I've been casually using pills (by just consuming them orally) since I was 19 (I'm in my mid-20s now). Whenever I happen to be able to get my hands on oxy or whatever I basically just go slow to avoid building up a tolerance so I can stretch them as much as possible, use them all up, and then wait until I find myself with more pills again. But at this stage in my life I find myself so messed up from depression and anxiety and agoraphobia that I *need* to be high to stop myself from ending things. I've been experimenting using gabapentin and diphenhydramine to get more out of the limited pills I have but I need more. I've considered graduating to dope but I feel like that doesn't even exist anymore where I live, everything is fentanyl. I just really wish I could get a script, using oxy I am able to much better control my mental health issues and suicidal ideation more than I ever was able to with the dozens of antidepressants, xanax, and therapy I've tried. And speaking of xanax (which I have a script for), whenever I can't get my hands on oxy I find myself taking xanax and drinking and blacking out and doing stuff like totaling my car and getting raped by a stranger. So at this point I feel like opiates are my bigger friend and I just wish I didn't have to put myself in danger to find oxy. I just don't understand how everyone is sustaining their habits these days, is everyone just on fentanyl? Sounds miserable to me.
Opioids how do people sustain their habits these days?
- Thread starter oxygirl_
- Start date
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Welcome to bluelight you'll find this is a good place.
Have you tried kratom?
Its relatively satisfying if you take enough. Of course i tend to get sick of shoveling mouthfuls of powder 7 times a day, but at least you'll have unlimited amounts.
Have you tried kratom?
Its relatively satisfying if you take enough. Of course i tend to get sick of shoveling mouthfuls of powder 7 times a day, but at least you'll have unlimited amounts.
Cakesofpattie
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Dec 6, 2021
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I feel like I’m the only black user left. Everyone is all about those stinking blues
Cakesofpattie
Greenlighter
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- Dec 6, 2021
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Saying that I feel like it’s hard to keep up with life and our habits. I try my best but have weened myself to get high when I feel sad that’s usually at night so there I go.
Thanks for the welcome!
I keep forgetting to try Kratom. I was given a brief introduction into that world by a friend a while ago but never followed thru bc I think I was concerned about the whole shoveling copious amounts of powder for a minor buzz. What does it actually feel like compared to pills?
Robi
Bluelighter
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high there pattie! welcome to bluelight, i went from basically free narco, to the stinking blues, took a ton for a good year, i preferred them, though i almost died and tolerance grew fast upward, they are the debbil, dont try it, i spent an easy 500 a week towards the end, i worked twice as hard with the incentive to supply self with drugs, i sent money to my sister but not as mush as i should have, i was never over weight, but i didnt buy but food much, so i got under weight, trying to save funds for my disgusting habit, but yeah i worked my thin ass as off to ruin my health and sanity, want the best for you
- Joined
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6 grams of kratom is about 15mg of oxycodone in strength.
Catch is, if you push the dose too much it will push back with some nasty nausea/dizziness.
Its worth a try. Try 4-5 grams of a red strain (like red bali), you can get capsules if you don't like powder.
Cakesofpattie
Greenlighter
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- Dec 6, 2021
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Thank you.. I live around a bunch of blue peeps. We all used to do black but they are all blue users now and they have all attitudes and have gotten mean. I stick to black because the blues scare me to death
HeadphonesandLSD
Bluelighter
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- Oct 10, 2011
- Messages
- 1,710
I sustained an oxy/pill habit for decades. In my experience everyone ends up in the same places.
- Staying on oxy and the other pills
You will just keep having to figure out ways to hustle up the money. Pills will continue to get more expensive due to the nature of the market. You'll have to wade through a bunch of fake/bunk shit constantly. You'll have to deal with people not keeping their word. You're probably going to have a couple of weeks out of the month where there is nothing to buy because all the legit scripts sold out within a day. You will end up resorting to non-oxycodone opioids and dealing with the same types of problems.
People I know maintaining this habit long term know how to hustle. Getting the pills is the central aspect of their life and they do it at the expense of everything else. They're often into shady/illegal shit and resorting to things for the habit they wouldn't do otherwise. By that I mean: Girls sell sex and dudes sell drugs/guns/whatever. It's not a great lifestyle. Even if you start out rich you'll end up in this place given enough time.
- Official opioid replacement therapy
These are the ones that could no longer sustain a habit to their opioid of choice for whatever reason. They pay the equivalent of rent money every month for access to the program. You are provided an opioid that isn't as fun as the one you like. You pee in a cup, attend group, and spend a lot of your free time dealing with BS for access to the opioid. Depending on where you go they might not even trust you to take the opioid home. You'll drive to the clinic first thing in the morning and a nurse will watch you take the opioid. Hope you don't have any problems getting there on time because they aren't waiting up for you.
The people I know in this place are usually depressed because they feel like a slave to the drug. They aren't getting high anymore. Well, they are but they can't feel it. It doesn't feel as good as their opioid of choice and prevents them from using their opioid of choice. Lots of them ping-pong between the opioid they like and the replacement to prevent getting sick. It isn't a fun time.
- Kratom
At first you really enjoy it because it's access to an opioid without all the bullshit. In time you learn to hate it as much as the others. I feel it's a better option than bupe/methadone if you have self control. It can cause all the problems with the others though. I live in constant fear that it'll get banned. It has its own set of unique side effects that you need to watch out for. There is no quality control in the kratom industry. I've found everything from human hair to bits of plastic in kratom. I've gotten bags of it that I knew were from very old leaf. You need to seek out good sources and be willing to pay for some quality. With a large habit it can get more expensive that some traditional opioids.
For you I'd suggest trying it. It's certainly less self destructive than an oxycodone habit
- Really going clean
Where everyone wants to be. Lots of people have different ways of doing it. Everything from cold turkey to taking Iboga. I remained clean for a long time a few years ago. It's really hard. Once you know that you can turn off all your pain with a pill it's hard to go back to a life without it. You will feel pain more acutely than the average person. Boo-boos start feeling like big boo-boos. The mental aspect is still there. I loved snorting oxy and to this day any time I see a straw I think about it. I haven't snorted oxycodone in a looooooooong time now.
You don't have to go all the way with one big leap. For you I'd suggest trying kratom and transition slowly into no opioids at all. It's important that you don't go back to oxy once you start the kratom. You need to do it in steps like this:
1) I will replace oxycodone with kratom
2) I will start to reduce my daily intake of kratom
3) I will only take kratom every other day and never two days in a row
4) I will only take kratom once a week on Saturday
5) I will only take kratom once a month on weekends
6) I will only take an opioid on my birthday (or some day that has meaning to you)
See what I mean? Set goals like that and slowly work towards them. When I quit methadone my goal was to go a week without taking any opioid at all. By the 9th day I decided I wanted to go a month. By the time a month rolled around I wanted to go three. Once I got to 3 months I didn't see much point in setting goals anymore. I had regained my self control. At least for the time being.
Don't get discouraged if you slip up. Addiction is a very powerful thing. It's the ability to lie to yourself. You will do mental gymnastics to justify using. We all do it. I am back on opioids now because someone closed to me died three years ago. I took opioids to feel better and numb the pain. I never stopped.
Best of luck to you.
- Staying on oxy and the other pills
You will just keep having to figure out ways to hustle up the money. Pills will continue to get more expensive due to the nature of the market. You'll have to wade through a bunch of fake/bunk shit constantly. You'll have to deal with people not keeping their word. You're probably going to have a couple of weeks out of the month where there is nothing to buy because all the legit scripts sold out within a day. You will end up resorting to non-oxycodone opioids and dealing with the same types of problems.
People I know maintaining this habit long term know how to hustle. Getting the pills is the central aspect of their life and they do it at the expense of everything else. They're often into shady/illegal shit and resorting to things for the habit they wouldn't do otherwise. By that I mean: Girls sell sex and dudes sell drugs/guns/whatever. It's not a great lifestyle. Even if you start out rich you'll end up in this place given enough time.
- Official opioid replacement therapy
These are the ones that could no longer sustain a habit to their opioid of choice for whatever reason. They pay the equivalent of rent money every month for access to the program. You are provided an opioid that isn't as fun as the one you like. You pee in a cup, attend group, and spend a lot of your free time dealing with BS for access to the opioid. Depending on where you go they might not even trust you to take the opioid home. You'll drive to the clinic first thing in the morning and a nurse will watch you take the opioid. Hope you don't have any problems getting there on time because they aren't waiting up for you.
The people I know in this place are usually depressed because they feel like a slave to the drug. They aren't getting high anymore. Well, they are but they can't feel it. It doesn't feel as good as their opioid of choice and prevents them from using their opioid of choice. Lots of them ping-pong between the opioid they like and the replacement to prevent getting sick. It isn't a fun time.
- Kratom
At first you really enjoy it because it's access to an opioid without all the bullshit. In time you learn to hate it as much as the others. I feel it's a better option than bupe/methadone if you have self control. It can cause all the problems with the others though. I live in constant fear that it'll get banned. It has its own set of unique side effects that you need to watch out for. There is no quality control in the kratom industry. I've found everything from human hair to bits of plastic in kratom. I've gotten bags of it that I knew were from very old leaf. You need to seek out good sources and be willing to pay for some quality. With a large habit it can get more expensive that some traditional opioids.
For you I'd suggest trying it. It's certainly less self destructive than an oxycodone habit
- Really going clean
Where everyone wants to be. Lots of people have different ways of doing it. Everything from cold turkey to taking Iboga. I remained clean for a long time a few years ago. It's really hard. Once you know that you can turn off all your pain with a pill it's hard to go back to a life without it. You will feel pain more acutely than the average person. Boo-boos start feeling like big boo-boos. The mental aspect is still there. I loved snorting oxy and to this day any time I see a straw I think about it. I haven't snorted oxycodone in a looooooooong time now.
You don't have to go all the way with one big leap. For you I'd suggest trying kratom and transition slowly into no opioids at all. It's important that you don't go back to oxy once you start the kratom. You need to do it in steps like this:
1) I will replace oxycodone with kratom
2) I will start to reduce my daily intake of kratom
3) I will only take kratom every other day and never two days in a row
4) I will only take kratom once a week on Saturday
5) I will only take kratom once a month on weekends
6) I will only take an opioid on my birthday (or some day that has meaning to you)
See what I mean? Set goals like that and slowly work towards them. When I quit methadone my goal was to go a week without taking any opioid at all. By the 9th day I decided I wanted to go a month. By the time a month rolled around I wanted to go three. Once I got to 3 months I didn't see much point in setting goals anymore. I had regained my self control. At least for the time being.
Don't get discouraged if you slip up. Addiction is a very powerful thing. It's the ability to lie to yourself. You will do mental gymnastics to justify using. We all do it. I am back on opioids now because someone closed to me died three years ago. I took opioids to feel better and numb the pain. I never stopped.
Best of luck to you.
Juniper Bruhmomentius
Bluelight Crew
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- May 10, 2019
- Messages
- 20,620
Bupre/benzo habit is luckily very cheap. Ketamine, pcp-analogs and heroin once or twice a year.
king of nod
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2014
- Messages
- 6
"6 grams of kratom is about 15mg of oxycodone in strength"
How did you come to that conclusion?
GetMeOutOfThisCRAP
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Dec 20, 2017
- Messages
- 1,938
I can't. Its WAY too much money so....
I had my time. It was genuinely fantastic *until the tail end of my "lets eat oxy all the time forever" run that proved to be financially and spiritually hard to maintain*. I'll drop oxy into mouther and swallow those cute lil colored pills on occasion because it is very hard to not indulge lol. The cravings accelerate until....
I really enjoy life so much better off opioids on the constant. The threat of withdrawal was really wearing me down, and especially towards the end. I would only get high for 15 minutes from 30 milligrams of Purdue's finest M30 blues. Then, just want more and more. How can anyone even wealthy afford that? The price has gone up to 2 dollars per milligram. Everyone and their grandmother knows that opiates ALL the time forever really fucking suck. We all know its better on occasion than 6 doses or more per each day. It takes time to adjust to that less constant use and it will never happen overnight. I thought about oxy quite a bit today and could've scored, but chose to just wait lol. Now at least when I do eat the pharmaceutical special brew that ruined the US, the euphoria is very present and the layers have returned that were no longer there from eating 3-4 blues a day.
Our options are to graduate to heroin and become top of the class (at ruining your life), or occasionally indulge and save your money for something fucking way better than oxy LOL. There's something wrong with opiates and we've all felt it. Something feels wrong even when the high pops up so strongly in the beginning. You just know that its both good and evil. The evil part is coming for you and you know that every single time you swallow or put it up the snorty snort. I don't know if opiates/opioids are supernatural but the closest thing I can call something supernatural would be opiates and the poppy plant. Something is wrong with it lol.
OP don't be too concerned about the hold it has over you. I know what thats like probably better than most people and have played the game for several years (maybe as long as you if not a bit more). It always works out in the end. Seems like you'll never be happy again every time you go through the withdrawal and some of that is physical--yes, but need I remind anyone if they do need to get off it from regular daily use.... of course you will be happy again. Literally everyone is happy again *in time* off opiates and you renegotiate and find for once.. something just "different" than constant pills that take away your positive and negative emotions/parts of yourself that you forgot were there. I'm not a saint.. I've done oxy several times this year after kicking cold turkey a moderate habit from the quarantine. I just like the ability to enjoy other things and indulge on occasion, and I can't see myself using everyday for months on end to years. It was a very bleak situation... I actually feared my life being taken away from me (literally/not literally) because of how enticing they were and how long it had been without me being able to stop fully. Opiates everyday = huge horror from each user knowing that something bigger than they are is controlling them at the end of it all. They make you your bitch when you're a daily user for years. Also, yes this class of drug is far more powerful than any one person. Its so much greater than us.. just look at the damage done by its existence and how widespread/suffering opiates have already tarnished the world with alone.. That is a lot bigger than any of us. Its ok to be defeated by it--and I'm not talking about sobriety off them. I'm talking about how it defeats us all when we are on them full-time or not. Sometimes they get the best of your psyche for sure. They definitely SMITED my bank account. Absolutely wrecked that "account" as in probably never had money.. spent it all on oxy and food to survive.
I had my time. It was genuinely fantastic *until the tail end of my "lets eat oxy all the time forever" run that proved to be financially and spiritually hard to maintain*. I'll drop oxy into mouther and swallow those cute lil colored pills on occasion because it is very hard to not indulge lol. The cravings accelerate until....
I really enjoy life so much better off opioids on the constant. The threat of withdrawal was really wearing me down, and especially towards the end. I would only get high for 15 minutes from 30 milligrams of Purdue's finest M30 blues. Then, just want more and more. How can anyone even wealthy afford that? The price has gone up to 2 dollars per milligram. Everyone and their grandmother knows that opiates ALL the time forever really fucking suck. We all know its better on occasion than 6 doses or more per each day. It takes time to adjust to that less constant use and it will never happen overnight. I thought about oxy quite a bit today and could've scored, but chose to just wait lol. Now at least when I do eat the pharmaceutical special brew that ruined the US, the euphoria is very present and the layers have returned that were no longer there from eating 3-4 blues a day.
Our options are to graduate to heroin and become top of the class (at ruining your life), or occasionally indulge and save your money for something fucking way better than oxy LOL. There's something wrong with opiates and we've all felt it. Something feels wrong even when the high pops up so strongly in the beginning. You just know that its both good and evil. The evil part is coming for you and you know that every single time you swallow or put it up the snorty snort. I don't know if opiates/opioids are supernatural but the closest thing I can call something supernatural would be opiates and the poppy plant. Something is wrong with it lol.
OP don't be too concerned about the hold it has over you. I know what thats like probably better than most people and have played the game for several years (maybe as long as you if not a bit more). It always works out in the end. Seems like you'll never be happy again every time you go through the withdrawal and some of that is physical--yes, but need I remind anyone if they do need to get off it from regular daily use.... of course you will be happy again. Literally everyone is happy again *in time* off opiates and you renegotiate and find for once.. something just "different" than constant pills that take away your positive and negative emotions/parts of yourself that you forgot were there. I'm not a saint.. I've done oxy several times this year after kicking cold turkey a moderate habit from the quarantine. I just like the ability to enjoy other things and indulge on occasion, and I can't see myself using everyday for months on end to years. It was a very bleak situation... I actually feared my life being taken away from me (literally/not literally) because of how enticing they were and how long it had been without me being able to stop fully. Opiates everyday = huge horror from each user knowing that something bigger than they are is controlling them at the end of it all. They make you your bitch when you're a daily user for years. Also, yes this class of drug is far more powerful than any one person. Its so much greater than us.. just look at the damage done by its existence and how widespread/suffering opiates have already tarnished the world with alone.. That is a lot bigger than any of us. Its ok to be defeated by it--and I'm not talking about sobriety off them. I'm talking about how it defeats us all when we are on them full-time or not. Sometimes they get the best of your psyche for sure. They definitely SMITED my bank account. Absolutely wrecked that "account" as in probably never had money.. spent it all on oxy and food to survive.
Last edited:
- Joined
- Jul 21, 2002
- Messages
- 12,042
Using a typical 1.2% mitragynine content, 6 grams of kratom will contain around 70mg of mitragynine. Mitragynine is around 1/3rd the strength of morphine and so 6 grams of kratom should have the analgesic efficacy of around 25mg of morphine. Which is around 15mg of oxycodone.
I've ordered 150x 600mg of Red Indo Kratom. Apparently high quality [price removed -negro]
I've given up the Oxys for few days and stopped the pods for about a week.
Just sticking with morphine, diazepam and Kava.
ķ kratom going to be something different enough that I'll feel the effects from?
Thanks in advance ccunij9ùllķkķķ
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What was the total daily oxycodone dosage?
Kratom will help withdrawal caused from maybe up to 120mg/day of oxycodone. Maybe even more. Not sure.
But there is a certain point of opioid dependency when kratom does absolutely nothing in relieving the symptoms and in fact makes the withdrawal worse. Not entirely sure where the line starts, but I do know that I have been far past wherever that line begins. Years ago I tried to take kratom to relieve withdrawal from very high dose opioids and it only made me feel worse. Seems to work fine on me these days though.
If your opioid use i'snt astronomical I'd start at 4-5g every 4-6 hours.
Just keep in mind 150 600mg capsules is not going to last long if you need 8 of them every 5 hours.
Not long term, I only had think it was 50x Oxyneo 40s. I was putting 2 or 3 in glass of coke for about 12 hours. The 1st 35-40 I was really feeling and then instantly nothing.
I've also totally stopped the pod powder. I'd be having 200-300g of high quality pod powder using your coffee maker method and wasn't feeling that. Thats been about a week off, I was taking every day since end of August and stopped feeling those as well.
The last week has been really really rough. I'm having 200mg Oramorph a day, only get a 500ml bottle a week, so I'll have to have 2 days where I do have pods. Hoping that after 10 days I'll feel something from the powder??
I'd been saving up my diazepam a bit only taking 20mg out of my 40mg for few months. So had 100-200mg daily, not even feeling that.
Got some Kava, ordered the Kratom, ordered some 5htp as well.
Really struggling mentally and physically, beginning to feel bit better. Anything else I can order, in UK, that'll help me.
After 6 months daily pod powder how long is it likely to be before I'm likely to feel them again? Still got think 10kg (22lbs) left. I'm generally throwing the seeds away, think I've got dunno roughly 5-10 kg of seeds. I know that seeds aren't as strong as the pods but is there anything in them that might mean I'll feel them as I've never bothered with them?
Many thanks
I've also totally stopped the pod powder. I'd be having 200-300g of high quality pod powder using your coffee maker method and wasn't feeling that. Thats been about a week off, I was taking every day since end of August and stopped feeling those as well.
The last week has been really really rough. I'm having 200mg Oramorph a day, only get a 500ml bottle a week, so I'll have to have 2 days where I do have pods. Hoping that after 10 days I'll feel something from the powder??
I'd been saving up my diazepam a bit only taking 20mg out of my 40mg for few months. So had 100-200mg daily, not even feeling that.
Got some Kava, ordered the Kratom, ordered some 5htp as well.
Really struggling mentally and physically, beginning to feel bit better. Anything else I can order, in UK, that'll help me.
After 6 months daily pod powder how long is it likely to be before I'm likely to feel them again? Still got think 10kg (22lbs) left. I'm generally throwing the seeds away, think I've got dunno roughly 5-10 kg of seeds. I know that seeds aren't as strong as the pods but is there anything in them that might mean I'll feel them as I've never bothered with them?
Many thanks
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LucidSDreamr
Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 23, 2013
- Messages
- 7,316
You switch back and forth between bupe and oxy. That's how inalways managed it
Opi_Kid_Rock
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 13, 2018
- Messages
- 933
I went from buying t3s, to percocets, to oxy(real ones 5 years ago), briefly touched the fent, then got (free)script for Suboxone and am still on Suboxone with the plan of getting off all opioids in 2 months from now. I’m blacklisted from ever being prescribed opiates ever again in my Country of course.
I’ve been treating my depression with opioids all this time and I feel that I’m strong enough to give it all up because my life has improved and don’t feel that I need the crutches anymore. I have overcome the worst of my past traumas while working a job that I find rewarding.
I’ve been treating my depression with opioids all this time and I feel that I’m strong enough to give it all up because my life has improved and don’t feel that I need the crutches anymore. I have overcome the worst of my past traumas while working a job that I find rewarding.
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Juniper Bruhmomentius
Bluelight Crew
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- May 10, 2019
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Mental health can pay what my wallet cant?
My Kratom arrived today. Trying to stop pod usage totally at moment......
Would rather just stick to my weekly
--Oramorph (500ml/1000mg)
--Diazepam 40mg daily
Plus I have 250 Methacarbamol, Cyclizine, 5htp, ashwagandha, Kava (not much).
I've already had my daily quota of Oramorph (5.30 pm). Want to try the Kratom now!!!! It's 1.5-1.8% Mitragynine (600mg Red Indo capsules).
Plus I have 25mg of diazepam left, for theday.
What would be a sensible starting dose as the percentages are bit higher.
What makes the most sense in terms of what to have when and with what
. Should I normally just have the Kratom if I'm not having any Morphine as well.I'll take 5. Any advise would be appreciated .
Ťhanks in advance