I've had social anxiety since I was about 17 which lead to bad depression, I'm now 24.
Managed to force myself to get a job about 2 month ago and force myself to get into social situations rather than avoid them but I'm about as lively as a fucking wet fish and basically sit on the sidelines listening to everyone else and laughing at the jokes other people make n shit as not to look like a miserable cunt.
Can't hold a conversation with people for shit and basically just ask simple questions and laugh but can't contribute to any conversation or say anything about myself, make people laugh or anything and this is me making a conscious effort to be more social otherwise I'd just be quite asf and not really have much to say at all.
Basically if this carries on I'll never have a gf or even any friends really, and if that's going to be the case I feel like life will be pointless, I don't have suicidal tendencies really but I do feel like there will be no point living if this is the way shits going to be for the rest of my life, and I'm just not happy at all and havn't been for a while, my head is really fucked.
Been to the doc but due to the fact I can't really explain whats going on in my head they just throw some shitty ass zombie pills at me that help to some extent as they make me not give af whether I act social or not, but that's never going to help my situation I'll just always be the same but just not give af about it which is useless really.
So just wondering how have people who have been depressed and socially anxious how did you deal with this shit, I just want to go back to enjoying social situations and enjoying conversations with people rather than when people try to talk to me just wanting to end it asap and not being able to keep up with conversations one bit.
Tried 10mg Diazepam which don't really do much and tried Xanax but ended up drinking on them and blacking out on them for a full night so didn't really have the chance to test them in a social situation.
Just wanna go back to being the happy person I once was who actually liked people and didn't just want to avoid them at all costs.
Managed to force myself to get a job about 2 month ago and force myself to get into social situations rather than avoid them but I'm about as lively as a fucking wet fish and basically sit on the sidelines listening to everyone else and laughing at the jokes other people make n shit as not to look like a miserable cunt.
Can't hold a conversation with people for shit and basically just ask simple questions and laugh but can't contribute to any conversation or say anything about myself, make people laugh or anything and this is me making a conscious effort to be more social otherwise I'd just be quite asf and not really have much to say at all.
Basically if this carries on I'll never have a gf or even any friends really, and if that's going to be the case I feel like life will be pointless, I don't have suicidal tendencies really but I do feel like there will be no point living if this is the way shits going to be for the rest of my life, and I'm just not happy at all and havn't been for a while, my head is really fucked.
Been to the doc but due to the fact I can't really explain whats going on in my head they just throw some shitty ass zombie pills at me that help to some extent as they make me not give af whether I act social or not, but that's never going to help my situation I'll just always be the same but just not give af about it which is useless really.
So just wondering how have people who have been depressed and socially anxious how did you deal with this shit, I just want to go back to enjoying social situations and enjoying conversations with people rather than when people try to talk to me just wanting to end it asap and not being able to keep up with conversations one bit.
Tried 10mg Diazepam which don't really do much and tried Xanax but ended up drinking on them and blacking out on them for a full night so didn't really have the chance to test them in a social situation.
Just wanna go back to being the happy person I once was who actually liked people and didn't just want to avoid them at all costs.