I dont regret ever taking drugs, but I regret I was unable for such a long time to have any control over my actions...
I fully believe in hedonism and I see drugs as a natural right, as a necessity for mental and emotional survival, it is in a way - for as far as my secular mind can give meaning to such a thing - something divine, its transcendental, it feeds the soul and I dont know if I can explain what Im going to say any further but to me drug use has something very primal, it can feed very basic instincts, like dulling fear, numbing sadness and pain, and because this is so primal this is by definition also very quintessential...
Since ancient time man has used drugs and attached deep meaning to its expierences, and this fact simply by itself doesnt need to change for me, and even ppl who recognize nothing in what I said, if users, will probably romantisize their experience; their high, their drug, their ROA, so in this way value extra muros is already created.
To me the criminalizing of if only personal use a violation of some of my essential human rights, and Im willing to make a change in such things, Im willing to participate in new movements striving to make a difference (When I was young I volunteered at Jelinek to give basic drug education to students in middle school, that was at the time a new project and they were looking for volunteers my age and I ended up updating the website with the newest information like a new study was published and such, I also got to assist in the lab a few times becsause my supervisor really became a friend and he knew I had great interest in everything they did and he gave me the chance to come into closer contact with several area's and learn a bit more about them. Later on I was in charge of getting into contact with all the supliers and fix all the drugs for the series druglab, where in every episode a drug is tried out, and after a while they wanted to meet up with a dealer, film while he cuts his coke etc... And I was in charge of doing the screening, I had to present the options, possibly not being recognizable, different voice but I also had to figure out why they wanted to go public with such things so I asked them why they did this and also to calculate possible risks like what if we are sitting here with several ks coke and cuts and the police should storm in, this was a real concern since both in their media contract as well in my contract with a Jelinek this didnt exist, so we could not say it was at that time our job to be there...
This were very interesting experiences for me, I learned a lot, came into contact with some fascinating ppl who more or less charised a similar vision as me, they organized several protests and petitions urging for progress also in those things I joined, but less since I dont want to be really political, but I find it a great thing that over here more ppl want to see the dawn of a new world when it comes to drugs and that it is generally accepted that I while back there were such protests to - just like with H - give severe addicts three free doses of clinical grade C a day, and since some yrs they actually started doing that and Im proud to be a part of this movement...
Im sorry that I spent so many words on this but these things feed a drive in me and then I just lose myself in my own fascination...
In short: drugs carry in every way great and significant importance to me, and I know ppl who find this pathetic of me, that someone actually finds meaning in drugs is absurd to them, I just think by myself if they would be able to feel just a fraction of my passion and drive they would lead a lot richer life and so I feel sorry for them...