• LAVA Moderator: Mysterier

do you ever give homeless people money?

I have a story about being hassled by beggars.

It was mid january in syracuse new york. I was living in a halfway house, had just gotten out of rehab. All I did was go to meetings and workout. I had just gotten off the bus and the sun was setting over my back, so it must have been between four and six pm. Two black gentleman in their early twentys got off the bus with me. One pretended to go the other way, while the other was walking and talking to me, so I was walking straight, he was walking backwards in front of me and the other guy had started following me maybe a couple yards at most behind me. I could see his shadow because of the setting sun. The first guy says first "let me get a newport man, let me get a newport.." I had cheap generics of regular cigs. I pull those out and offer him one he turns it down. so we are walking im getting closer to the halfway house and I have this apprehensive feeling come over me cos this guy has been steady talking to me and his buddy is obviously following me, so I stuck my hand in my pocket and my roll of quarters I had just got for laundry and just held onto that in my pocket. Next thing the guy says is "let me hold onto a dollar." Pretty much demanding it, so I think if I give him a dollar nothing will happen, so i grab a dollar out of my pocket hand it to him. he says "let me hold onto five dollars" I stop and say "Hold onto? are you going to pay me back?" now mind you the people in the westside dont shovel their walks and because people are walking back and forth on this street between the crackhouses it is all ice, as what happens when it snows, doesnt get shoveled, gets warm one day, then is cold. Its hard to walk on. So I hear rustling behind me, and his buddy is coming up behind me quickly because I can still see his shadow. I sidestep out into the road as he tries to throw a punch. He slips on the ice and is thrown off balance...he obviously thought he was going to connect. I then take my hand with the roll of quarters in out of my pocket and proceed to throw a haymaker as hard as I could. Praise my luck, it connected...it connected perfectly. That was an amazing feeling. I felt like a freaking ninja cos that guy went down hard, instantly knocked out cos I hit him right next to his ear. His buddy backs up and goes to start running but slips and falls on the ice. He didnt have his timberlands laced up right and his pants were too baggy...as was the style then. As he is getting up I start throwing punches at his face connecting with a few. At this point a couple people from the halfway house run out to see whats going on. They run up and the first guy runs off and just leaves his friend laying there knocked out, I mean what a coward right?. We check his pulse, and do a sternum rub on him to get him up. He stumbles down the street. These were two guys that were dressed a hell of a lot better than me...timberland boots, avirex jackets, designer jeans...they obviously expected to roll me cos they thought I was some suburban kid coming down to the projects to score. I grew up in a bad neighborhood. The first rule of fighting someone is make sure your shoes are tied and your pants aren't falling down...They took to calling me champ in the halfway house after that.

Living in that halfway house I came across a lot of crackheads, as the halfway houses in syracuse are in bad neighborhoods. There was literally a crack hotel across the street. I have had so many crackheads and alcoholics come up to me and ask "to hold onto a dollar." I don't give those people money, especially cos they are very insistent.

I do however give food and money to people on the street if I have it, and they didn't just walk out of a crackhouse. It is true most of those people are just down on their luck and really do appreciate the handouts. I however will "blacklist" a homeless person that routinely asks people for money and is rude or obnoxious. You get once with me and its like a job interview. If you mess it up, don't ever expect anything else from me. I also will almost always give money to young street junkies. I know what its like to be sick and just needing another couple dollars to get a fix. I have compassion in that situation, especially if they are honest.
 
I never give money to homeless people because 99% of the homeless people I know ain't actually homeless, there scrounges! They just go out begging because they know if they sit on the street floor outside a train station or in a busy and wealthy area looking like a tramp someone will hand them a few pounds.

Some that I know that do go out begging actually have a property payed for by the local council. There just going out begging to get extra money for there drug or alcohol problem.
 
I only ever give to entertaining homeless.
Like, there's this guy near my bank who juggles.. And there's this crazy old woman at the mall who talks about the rapture all day..
Whenever I see them, I give them a crumpled up dollar bill with a blotter hidden inside.
 
I admit usually I do not because I feel they do pester you. I have several times given homeless people food I wasnt eating but even that is rare.

But this weekend I was celebrating my birthday in a relatively big city. I was in a strange frame of mind. I hadnt slept the night before and was using various stimulants to keep going. I had a great meal and was just generally happy as it was my birthday as I mentioned. I went to a club and started drinking. This whole combination of events made me quite empathetic and positive.

I went out for a smoke and there was this homeless kid in his mid 20s. I didnt initially give him anything but just chatted with him. He admitted to being an addict but said he was clean. I have my doubts as he was nodding a lot but whatever. He said he actually went to school to learn masonry and completed the work, but a combination of addiction, having no address and the difficulties of getting a job in this particular city (unions or something, he wasnt too clear) led him to continue to live on the streets. I gave him a few bucks and bought him a soda.

Later in the night, I was walking to a pizza joint and an older guy, mid 50s maybe started telling me jokes. He walked with me and told me his story. He was dishonorably discharged from the Army for fighting and it has been following him ever since. Again I asked about drugs and he admitted crack was his thing. I ordered my food and we continued to walk and talk together. He offered to carry my food, which I believe was sincere, but I am not stupid and declined. Again, I gave him some cash and food, he gave me directions to my hotel and was gone.

Now I am sure my money went to drugs. I never felt threatened but still instinctively made sure I still had my wallet, phone, and money and prepared myself for altercation. Nothing like that happened but for whatever reason, I am glad I took a few minutes to talk to these guys. There are many people one bad incident away from being homeless and thousands who ready are on the streets. I am in no way rich, but comfortable enough to normally just see the homeless as ornaments of the urban landscape. It is not often many of us mingle with the less fortunate and doing so gave me a better perspective on both their and my own life.

I doubt I will repeat what I did and I live in suburbia so rarely encounter the homeless. But I will certainly think about being a bit generous when I do see somebody on the street. But I wont reflexively through cash at every one begging. Like any level of society, there are terrible people who are homeless. I dont know how I will discern the good from the bad exactly but it felt good just hearing these guys issues and giving them shit was secondary. It turned those decorations into people and made me more inclined to not simply walk by one of my fellow human beings.

Ok I am rambling on. I guess the moral to me is, we are all in this world together. A simple act of talking to those unlike ourselves is the only way any problem can be solved. I think learning this is the key to our survival. But that is a totally different issue I dont want to get into.
 
...99% of the homeless people I know ain't actually homeless...
wow. you know a lot of homeless people. 99% is a very accurate figure. how did you gather the data which enabled you to come up with such an accurate analysis?

alasdair
 
I was recently in SE Asia. There, I found numerous poor souls in need of money. Dirty, bare foot, missing limbs. It was heart breaking. Just a $US for each put a massive smile on their faces.
 
I always give homeless people $5 when I have money on me , and for everyone saying they gonna spend it on alcohol or drugs go on YouTube and look up social experiment homeless people , basically this guy asks a lot of homeless people if they would rather a bottle of vodka and a pack of cigarettes or a subway voucher and every single one of them take the subway voucher I don't care what they spend it on there fucking homeless they have nothing but the clothes on there back I was homeless for 2 years and it sucked starving all the time feeling so depressed I would never wanna be in that situation again and I feel sorry for EVERY homeless person well that's just me
 
Yeah I give em weed before. Depends on how much I respect "their hustle". It feels nice to help out one person even if its just a fleeting moment.
 
I have been homeless and yes I used every cent that I recieved to support a heroin habit. I don't feel bad about this.
 
I happily live in the middle of bumfuck nowhere these days but my old city protocol was:
Loose change and smokes only, loose change goes to first beggar, other beggars get "sorry, already gave my change to some dude" unless I really like the beggar and he isn't surrounded by other beggars.
Figure the beggar knows what they need better than I do, and if that's something to help with boredom, or discomfort that's quite alright to me.
 
Yes...I almost always do. BUT...not if they're being rude to me. I judge everyone, homeless, not homeless, whatever by how they treat me. I really don't care why you need the money. I have been homeless. I do appreciate sincerity. If someone is trying to buy a bag, honesty goes far with me. Once, and while I myself was in active heroin addiction, a guy I often saw on the street asked me for $10...he said "please, I'm really sick. I'll pay you back" I gave him the money. I had it at that time...and he did in fact pay me back...or attempt to. It was the gesture that mattered to me. I told him to keep it and thanked him. At that time in my life, I was ok with money. I'm not the person to listen to probably...Ive been told I'm too generous, but I don't believe that's possible-to be "too generous"...but we're all different.

I also know the flipside of this. I had a friend I was staying with, and every weekend, he would beg in Center City, Phila....and make a fortune. I was not ok with that. I told him my position on it. I don't try to figure it out when I see someone ask for money. If I can, I will give something...I also will get someone food, etc...if I can. If I can't I tell them.
 
I do give.
My son was homeless for a little while.

One day, though, I was in a pissy mood when a homeless young man approached my car window.

I told him " my homeless son doesn't ask YOUR Mom for money."

He apologized and wished me a wonderful evening.
 
i do not. never have. work downtown and don't give homeless people money everyday. i don't second guess myself with the drunks. but the regulars just standing on the sidewalk who say hello as you pass by. it's all principle. and sometimes i feel like i'm fighting really hard to reason why not to give a fellow human being something that means almost nothing to me and will mean so much to them. so much that receiving it would result in them feeling joy and relief. but anyway, i never do.

do you?

You bet I do but I'm selective. Does he/she seem genuinely friendly and open? If they have a pet does the pet seem really attached and liking them? Then I give them money feel grateful that by the grace of fate than something hasn't put me where they are. Makes my day sometimes.
 
i give any loose change or perhaps a dollar or two depending on the person. where i live the majority of homeless people under 30 are scrounging up enough funds to score dope. more often than not the older folks buy food and alcohol. i give money freely and without judgement, unless the guy is some ungracious, aggressive, asshole.
 
If I'm in a good mood cuz fuck it.

Many "homeless" pull $200 a day begging and put it in their arm so fuck em, no sympathy or anything.

Never met a cool homeless person.
 
Yes I do because for some reason I have this huge fear that I am going to be homeless someday soon and if that were to happen to me and I had to resort to panhandling I would hope a kind human would help me out when in need. What goes around.. ya know.
 
In my town there are two small theatres that make organic, non-gmo popped corn and they use real butter if you so desire. If you buy a large it includes a free refill. I usually buy a large without butter for myself and when I come out of the movie late at night and there is no one on the streets but the homeless I find someone to give the refill (with butter ;)) to. I've done this so often that people are starting to say, "Hey! It's the popcorn Lady!"
 
If they're standing outside mcdonalds and want to buy some food sure. If I have to walk passed them on the way to work every day, never.
 
For drugs, booze, or healthy food I honestly do and have given a good amount to the homeless as I used to busk in a area with a lot of them. But for like fast food or sodas and stuff like that I really don't like to promote that behavior.
 
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