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December '14 -- SL Getting & Staying Sober Thread

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I've been living with one for sometime. :\
Hang in there Blue!
 
It's been 52 hours since my last line of dope.

Suboxen (very small amounts) and booze have kept me down enough to fight the cravings. Its not sober but, hey, its something...

After 3 years straight i think I've finally hit the point of being the fuck over it and all the bullshit that comes with it. But the stomach cramps....

Oh, the stomach cramps.... I can barely walk :/
 
ShipwreckedSage said:
It's been 52 hours since my last line of dope.

Suboxen (very small amounts) and booze have kept me down enough to fight the cravings. Its not sober but, hey, its something...

After 3 years straight i think I've finally hit the point of being the fuck over it and all the bullshit that comes with it. But the stomach cramps....

Oh, the stomach cramps.... I can barely walk :/
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You have youre immodium and kratom right??
 
Together we will beat this this week. We will sweat a lot, we will make mistakes, but we will move on and be as clean as we get,lol big love, cfz
 
aq. said:
I never knew how addictive poppy seed tea could be... I have been using it "recreationally" on the weekends, but now I crave it everyday. I was so sick from it that it made me vomit, hallucinate, sleep for about 20 hours etc.

This was a tough year, and I was on and off with opiates. Maybe January will be better for me, but December is so fucking hard right now.
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I feel you. A few years ago I was on poppy tea everyday. Came off it with Tramadol, then came off Tramadol with Kratom tea, the latter of which I've been on everyday for the past several months. This is the last year I'm addicted/dependent on anything. I'm going off it all cold turkey starting tomorrow. I know I'll be in hell the next few days but I need to get through it. And I will.
 
CfZrx said:
Together we will beat this this week. We will sweat a lot, we will make mistakes, but we will move on and be as clean as we get,lol big love, cfz
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I'm with you guys too this week. After several years of daily use I'll be going through opiate withdrawal starting tomorrow. Wish I could be put in a coma for it.
 
Still clean, getting sick though (its an Xmas tradition for me fer reals)
 
9 months off opiates and benzos

Wow can't believe its been that long but its been worth it for the most part. My life is a lot better today, i mean it's still life so it sucks sometimes but at least i'm not consistently miserable anymore. I still drink every other week on Fridays but i've been able to control that fine. It's never been a problem, I can stop after a couple beers. I did have a few slips along the way. In the summer at a phish show I did Weed, Acid, and Molly each once. Then I did MXE for a week in October which was a problem but I was able to cut myself off before it got too bad. Basically I don't think total abstinence works for me at all. I get isolated and depressed, then I start obsessing about using. Though this doesn't apply to Benzos and Opiates, I have to completely avoid them because they are way to addicting for me to ever use recreationally. I graduated IOP and now i'm almost finished with outpatient treatment. Staying accountable and talking about shit has been huge in keeping me clean. Hopefully, i'll OK once it's finished since it's sorta become a big part of my life. Good luck to everyone if I can stay clean this long anyone can.
 
^ hell yeah

good night all<3

NIGHT.jpg
 
As of today I have one week completely sober! No weed, no alcohol, not even an aspirin.

I have noticed my anxiety levels have dropped considerably since stopping the marijuana but I still crave it pretty constantly. Quitting and staying off weed has always been especially hard for me and I am actually more proud of myself for abstaining from cannabis products than for staying off opiates.

I hope everyone else is doing well, for me the holidays are an especially though time of year.
 
Congrats! It gets way better. Weed can be a real biatch. I am sick as a dog but I love being able to spend time with my family clean. I am laying in bed now, GF is going to pick me in a few hours and we are going to hitup a meeting (my home group)
 
I also sometimes crave cannabis even though it's been years since I used any. But I realize it's just a craving/obsession, and that it will pass. I don't have any access to it, and I don't even own any paraphernalia for it since I gave that away.

I also was sick with a minor cold or something recently, and it made breathing normally difficult and I did think back about how when I used to smoke/vape herb how my allergies were always a lot worse then, and I did run and do other types of cardio exercise while I used cannabis but ever since I quit I am in better physical condition than when I used cannabis.

Have a wonderful Christmas everyone, and a safe and happy New Year.
 
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Congratulations everyone! 120 days off the H for me today.

Last year today during the holidays I was taking care of some pets in a beautiful home across the city. BUT, I was not sure if I was going to die there and make it through to New Years, or ever be able to work again without opiates. Having to use to work and basically live, and fix to get out of bed in the morning so I could feel my arm was the best it got as that's all I looked forward to in life. That morning dose.
I would wake up and couldn't feel my arm up into my body, some sort of respiratory nerve spinal related issue that only using would take care of. Extreme pain to instant 'seeming' normalcy on a daily basis. It's not the way I want to live my life now and don't have to… Sometimes I wonder If I'm still here every day I awake in the dream.

It's good to be back and have choice without relying on something outside of myself to function… I still have a sick sense of humor but I don't have to use it.. well, sometimes…. :) <3
 
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congrats Smoky :) THat's amazing. And I think a sick sense of humor helps us get through life without going crazy ;)
 
Decision time as to my future coming up soon....

Just got off the benzos and opiates again, need to have a serious think about the possibility of abstinence really. I totally don't know if it's what I need but it's definitely a consideration. I'm feeling pretty good at the moment, I have no compulsion to hit the booze hard or anything like that at all. Just the opposite in fact, one or two drinks and I just feel done, it's weird. I'm aware all that can change very easily though.

Confusing, confusing, confusing.....
 
just got off a little opiate run. I've been using at least 3 times per week for the last few months, and more recently half gram of H a day. I hate it! I got off easy with suboxone in very low doses. Sober yesterday and today - no sub, no nothing - but today I feel like using, I'm not going to lie! Going to get osme exercise later to get my mind off of it.
 
I am having a really shitty day. Really bad anxiety, some of the worst I have ever had. I only slept like 2 hours last night which makes the anxiety exponentially worse. I have already talked myself into relapsing although I haven't done it just yet. I will likely end up getting either some weed or beer (or both) and telling myself that at least I am not taking opiates or benzos, this is true but it is a cop out. I've justified it in my head already by saying it is almost the new year so I will just fuck up for now since this year has already been wasted and start over for 2015.

fuck
 
straightrazor said:
I am having a really shitty day. Really bad anxiety, some of the worst I have ever had. I only slept like 2 hours last night which makes the anxiety exponentially worse. I have already talked myself into relapsing although I haven't done it just yet. I will likely end up getting either some weed or beer (or both) and telling myself that at least I am not taking opiates or benzos, this is true but it is a cop out. I've justified it in my head already by saying it is almost the new year so I will just fuck up for now since this year has already been wasted and start over for 2015.

fuck
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2015 means shit. Its just one more day after the end of 2014.

Can you just stick it out one more day? Get a good nights sleep and see how you feel. But I know that feeling you have right now.. And I know you just want a break from it all.. But using is only going to make it that much harder when you try again.

And I do promise you this, that high won't be what you remember. It's never the same.
 
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