NGW
Greenlighter
- Joined
- May 9, 2017
- Messages
- 19
Hi all!
I'm new to this and this is my first post, understand there are probably many similar threads but just wanted to get this out!
About two weeks ago me and some friends went to visit some other friends at their apartment for a chilled get together (whatever you wanna call it) little did i know what was to come.
So back in august last year was when i had my first mdma experience which was at a festival - one of the best days of my life.
I have taken it a few times since then, second time being in October, third time in February this year which were all great experiences (all festival/rave environments) and just recently two weeks ago at my friends which is what i'm now getting at.
So we get to my friends and we are all chilling and i had been drinking since around 3pm, not heavily but i have had a few beers and what not. One of the people living there asked if anybody wanted any drugs picking up, i had agreed to buy some mdma for an event i'm going to at the end of this month.
Fast forward to about 12-1am and i had been smoking quite abit of weed (i smoke very rarely) and the occasional beer and one of my friends that was rolling has been bugging me to take a little bit of mdma with him so he 'wasnt alone' and i had refused many times.
Like an idiot i fell into peer pressure and agree'd to take a little bit with my other friend. So he took a small cup of water and entered two tips of a straw of mdma into the cup which was for me and my friend to share. We took a couple of sips each.
*At this point i'd like to make clear i've always been the most 'sensible' and most cautious out of all my friends, e.g researching as much as possible, testing mdma, spacing out rolls, all basic precautions that ensure a safe roll. I usually get told by my friends i worry too much but they're the ones who don't respect the drug.*
Anyway 20 minutes later i finish the rest of the cup of mdma laced water. Probably an hour later from first sips i'm not really feeling anything, i stand up to talk to my friend in the kitchen when all of a sudden i start to feel it creep up on me, that moment of realization when you feel yourself talking alot so you begin to smile and chuckle. I walk back into the room where my friends are and music is playing, i'm standing up moving around abit before i sit down on the bed.
This is where it all goes downhill..
As i sit down, i begin to feel it hit me, hard. I remember sitting there and feeling the tingles rush through my body, my temperature rise and my heart rate increase. It just happened so hard and fast, i wasn't prepared.
I'm sitting there on the bed and musics still playing and people are talking and i'm begging to feel very uncomfortable. I tell my friend (who took a couple of sips of the drink with me) i say "dude, it's hit me hard and i'm starting to freak out" i can feel my heart racing and i start panicking. He's telling me to calm down and all that but it all just becomes too much and i walk out of the room and head to the door for some fresh air.
I open the door and sit on the door step and try to calm down, but the more i think about it the more worked up i get, the more worked up i get the faster my heart seems to race.
Eventually i start having a massive panic attack, feeling really uneasy, thinking the worst of scenarios and that something bad is gonna happen to me. I tell my friend you might have to call someone because i was that scared haha.
My brain is on overload and my friends are trying to calm me down, one of them hands me some water and an ice lolly.
An hour or more later i begin start calming down but heart is still racing and temperature still high. I walk back into the room and sit down.
This continued til about 5-6am and eventually go to sleep. Those were definitely the scariest and most horrible 4-5 hours of my life.
I spent the next day mostly in bed and feeling absolutely guilty and annoyed at myself. I had absolutely no intention of rolling but i made a bad decision and suffered from it.
The day after that was even worse. I was travelling back home on a coach and long story short suffered from an anxiety attack, heart started racing again and started to panic and felt really uncomfortable, especially knowing i was stuck on the coach sitting next to a stranger. Baring in mind I've never suffered from any anxiety in the past.
I've never experienced a come down as such with my previous rolls but that was definitely the first proper come down i had, i felt slightly anxious the following couple of days and started feeling normal again about a week later. I feel fine now, and still regretting that night.
I still have the gram of mdma that i bought that night. I'm still going to the event in 2 weeks which will be exactly a month since i took the mdma.
I want to roll that night but i'm afraid of having another bad experience like last time and i start to freak out again. Just thinking about it gets me a little anxious.
Also, because in the past i have spaced out my rolls (which is one of the reasons i didn't want to roll 2 weeks ago) i'm not sure if i'll be giving myself enough time to recover.
Will i be okay to roll again a month later? It will only be a one off as i will be taking a 3 month break before i roll again at a festival at the end of august.
It's a shame because my previous experiences were great and it's kinda ruined that for me so i'm hoping if i roll this month it will make me love mdma again.
Could i have just taken too much? Could smoking weed have made me paranoid? Did drinking alcohol before hand affect me?
I hope that wasn't too long! i'd love to hear your thoughts and what you think i should do.
THANKS FOR READING X
I'm new to this and this is my first post, understand there are probably many similar threads but just wanted to get this out!
About two weeks ago me and some friends went to visit some other friends at their apartment for a chilled get together (whatever you wanna call it) little did i know what was to come.
So back in august last year was when i had my first mdma experience which was at a festival - one of the best days of my life.
I have taken it a few times since then, second time being in October, third time in February this year which were all great experiences (all festival/rave environments) and just recently two weeks ago at my friends which is what i'm now getting at.
So we get to my friends and we are all chilling and i had been drinking since around 3pm, not heavily but i have had a few beers and what not. One of the people living there asked if anybody wanted any drugs picking up, i had agreed to buy some mdma for an event i'm going to at the end of this month.
Fast forward to about 12-1am and i had been smoking quite abit of weed (i smoke very rarely) and the occasional beer and one of my friends that was rolling has been bugging me to take a little bit of mdma with him so he 'wasnt alone' and i had refused many times.
Like an idiot i fell into peer pressure and agree'd to take a little bit with my other friend. So he took a small cup of water and entered two tips of a straw of mdma into the cup which was for me and my friend to share. We took a couple of sips each.
*At this point i'd like to make clear i've always been the most 'sensible' and most cautious out of all my friends, e.g researching as much as possible, testing mdma, spacing out rolls, all basic precautions that ensure a safe roll. I usually get told by my friends i worry too much but they're the ones who don't respect the drug.*
Anyway 20 minutes later i finish the rest of the cup of mdma laced water. Probably an hour later from first sips i'm not really feeling anything, i stand up to talk to my friend in the kitchen when all of a sudden i start to feel it creep up on me, that moment of realization when you feel yourself talking alot so you begin to smile and chuckle. I walk back into the room where my friends are and music is playing, i'm standing up moving around abit before i sit down on the bed.
This is where it all goes downhill..
As i sit down, i begin to feel it hit me, hard. I remember sitting there and feeling the tingles rush through my body, my temperature rise and my heart rate increase. It just happened so hard and fast, i wasn't prepared.
I'm sitting there on the bed and musics still playing and people are talking and i'm begging to feel very uncomfortable. I tell my friend (who took a couple of sips of the drink with me) i say "dude, it's hit me hard and i'm starting to freak out" i can feel my heart racing and i start panicking. He's telling me to calm down and all that but it all just becomes too much and i walk out of the room and head to the door for some fresh air.
I open the door and sit on the door step and try to calm down, but the more i think about it the more worked up i get, the more worked up i get the faster my heart seems to race.
Eventually i start having a massive panic attack, feeling really uneasy, thinking the worst of scenarios and that something bad is gonna happen to me. I tell my friend you might have to call someone because i was that scared haha.
My brain is on overload and my friends are trying to calm me down, one of them hands me some water and an ice lolly.
An hour or more later i begin start calming down but heart is still racing and temperature still high. I walk back into the room and sit down.
This continued til about 5-6am and eventually go to sleep. Those were definitely the scariest and most horrible 4-5 hours of my life.
I spent the next day mostly in bed and feeling absolutely guilty and annoyed at myself. I had absolutely no intention of rolling but i made a bad decision and suffered from it.
The day after that was even worse. I was travelling back home on a coach and long story short suffered from an anxiety attack, heart started racing again and started to panic and felt really uncomfortable, especially knowing i was stuck on the coach sitting next to a stranger. Baring in mind I've never suffered from any anxiety in the past.
I've never experienced a come down as such with my previous rolls but that was definitely the first proper come down i had, i felt slightly anxious the following couple of days and started feeling normal again about a week later. I feel fine now, and still regretting that night.
I still have the gram of mdma that i bought that night. I'm still going to the event in 2 weeks which will be exactly a month since i took the mdma.
I want to roll that night but i'm afraid of having another bad experience like last time and i start to freak out again. Just thinking about it gets me a little anxious.
Also, because in the past i have spaced out my rolls (which is one of the reasons i didn't want to roll 2 weeks ago) i'm not sure if i'll be giving myself enough time to recover.
Will i be okay to roll again a month later? It will only be a one off as i will be taking a 3 month break before i roll again at a festival at the end of august.
It's a shame because my previous experiences were great and it's kinda ruined that for me so i'm hoping if i roll this month it will make me love mdma again.
Could i have just taken too much? Could smoking weed have made me paranoid? Did drinking alcohol before hand affect me?
I hope that wasn't too long! i'd love to hear your thoughts and what you think i should do.
THANKS FOR READING X
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