• S E X
    L O V E +
    R E L A T I O N S H I P S


    ❤️ Welcome Guest! ❤️


    Posting Guidelines Bluelight Rules
  • SLR Moderators: axe battler | xtcgrrrl | arrall

Anyone ever had a bad experience with BDSM?

Haha. I talked to a few people on there but I didn’t find anyone I really liked. There’s a lot of female subs and not a huge amount of male Doms in Sydney on there. They do meet ups too! I deleted my account a while ago though.
 
Lol sorry I was just wondering about any stories you could share. Supposedly my university has a BDSM club so that might be an ideal place to start
 
thegreenhand said:
I'd love for a girl to dominate and have her fucking way with me but most that I meet don't quite seem the type for that sort of thing..
Click to expand...
They're around!
I suppose depends what you are after exactly ... i think there's lots of women (me included) who'd "pounce" more often or at least be more likely to initiate sex if it wasn't for the lingering taboo against female sexual aggression. When I used to try to iniate sex with my ex, he'd often reject me, and somehow if you're a woman, getting rejected makes you feel sort of grotesque and ridiculous ... makes you doubt your attractiveness too.

I realise men have got to risk rejection all the time, but it seems like it
might not be quite as embarrassing for a guy ... it's as if getting rejected sometimes is still seen as sort of an "occupational hazard" of being a man rather than something personal?

Course I am 46 so all
of the above might be a bit "old hat" but in my 20s such ideas still seemed to prevail....
 
Yeah exactly, men have to handle rejection all the time (some gracefully others not so much) but I haven’t met a woman who could do the same. Even I hate initiating and the thought of rejection. I guess because the more you do it you get desensitised but we don’t do it enough.
 
MrsGamp said:
They're around!
I suppose depends what you are after exactly ... i think there's lots of women (me included) who'd "pounce" more often or at least be more likely to initiate sex if it wasn't for the lingering taboo against female sexual aggression. When I used to try to iniate sex with my ex, he'd often reject me, and somehow if you're a woman, getting rejected makes you feel sort of grotesque and ridiculous ... makes you doubt your attractiveness too.

I realise men have got to risk rejection all the time, but it seems like it
might not be quite as embarrassing for a guy ... it's as if getting rejected sometimes is still seen as sort of an "occupational hazard" of being a man rather than something personal?

Course I am 46 so all
of the above might be a bit "old hat" but in my 20s such ideas still seemed to prevail....
Click to expand...
Well idk exactly what i'm after haha. There's one girl I work with who went on a date/hung out with once that i think may have some of that female sexual aggression you mention but given that i work with her the age old adage "Don't shit where you eat" keeps popping into my head. Though I'm not one to be bothered by post sex awkwardness so maybe I should go for it. You don't think it's weird to be upfront about how that's what i'm looking for right? We've already joked a little about kinks anyways.

I definitely take it personal rather than "occupational hazard" but that could just be me. I've never been one to be super forward about my physical attractions (often to my own frustration). I'm not particularly an alpha male, if you will, so you don't catch me just hooking up with too many people. Not that I'm against it I just often lack the balls to initiate it. And as you said it's rarely the girl that does so the hard part is left to me.

Ya know now that I write all this out I'm thinking I really need to ask her out again and say how i feel. Say that I'm really into her and if that goes well then I let on to my sexual fantasies haha.
 
thegreenhand said:
Well idk exactly what i'm after haha. There's one girl I work with who went on a date/hung out with once that i think may have some of that female sexual aggression you mention but given that i work with her the age old adage "Don't shit where you eat" keeps popping into my head. Though I'm not one to be bothered by post sex awkwardness so maybe I should go for it. You don't think it's weird to be upfront about how that's what i'm looking for right? We've already joked a little about kinks anyways.

I definitely take it personal rather than "occupational hazard" but that could just be me. I've never been one to be super forward about my physical attractions (often to my own frustration). I'm not particularly an alpha male, if you will, so you don't catch me just hooking up with too many people. Not that I'm against it I just often lack the balls to initiate it. And as you said it's rarely the girl that does so the hard part is left to me.

Ya know now that I write all this out I'm thinking I really need to ask her out again and say how i feel. Say that I'm really into her and if that goes well then I let on to my sexual fantasies haha.
Click to expand...
why not ask her out?
my only advice is maybe wait until things are getting intimate before confiding your sexual fantasies at great length - unless she identifies openly as a "Dom" of course. I am only recommending this because IME it's sexier if it's more spontaneous. Also you don't want her to get the idea you are just sort of coldly experimenting.....there are a thousand little ways you could kind of make your wishes known once you're actually in a clinch. no doubt if the relationship progressed you could get more explicit about your hopes ...
 
I second the Fet recommendation but for us it's mostly to find social gatherings/events and read a lot.
It's one of those places that has a lot to offer if you don't get sidetracked by the random thirsty idiot (usually married and cheating) or predator in general.
(Unless you're into that. )

To the original question though.

6 months ago I instinctively sweeped my hand to block a crop like device instead of using words to convey I needed it to slow down and got a tiny fracture in a finger.

I mean, I tripped over my cat.🥴
 
Last edited:
So how would one start bdsm?? I like to get naked and fuck lol byt ladies let me know
 
IDK what to do but I would for surely rub my hard cock all over mrs g's face and slap.force it through her lips but idk...Sorry guys I am just so hard again. No pills jsut sex!
 
Very bad and horny all dayyyy..I don't know bsm but wow I would give it to you hard..I love nasty fucking being controlled and obviously making a mess on pretty faces..like yours....Damn I should probably jack off now...;.Come over pleaseeeeee
 
MrsGamp said:
why not ask her out?
my only advice is maybe wait until things are getting intimate before confiding your sexual fantasies at great length - unless she identifies openly as a "Dom" of course. I am only recommending this because IME it's sexier if it's more spontaneous. Also you don't want her to get the idea you are just sort of coldly experimenting.....there are a thousand little ways you could kind of make your wishes known once you're actually in a clinch. no doubt if the relationship progressed you could get more explicit about your hopes ...
Click to expand...
Yeah haha I wouldn’t be THAT forward about it. Just once we start to get more intimate/physical. The spontaneity is a good point, I hadn’t really thought of that before. I’m gonna be out of town for the next week so once I get back I’ll see if she wants to hang out... I’ll keep yall updated ;)
 
thegreenhand said:
I'd love for a girl to dominate and have her fucking way with me but most that I meet don't quite seem the type for that sort of thing..
Click to expand...
Believe me, they exist, but I can't recommend anybody do what I did...

The good news is that, while you probably shouldn't say on the first date "I want you to have your fucking way with me", there are plenty of signs that might indicate whether a woman has any interest in that. Like if she seems to enjoy scratching your head or being the big spoon or something else like that. It's not a guarantee of course.
 
atara said:
Believe me, they exist, but I can't recommend anybody do what I did...

The good news is that, while you probably shouldn't say on the first date "I want you to have your fucking way with me", there are plenty of signs that might indicate whether a woman has any interest in that. Like if she seems to enjoy scratching your head or being the big spoon or something else like that. It's not a guarantee of course.
Click to expand...
Do you think a woman being bisexual may indicate this to some extent? Since that might mean that they are used to taking the lead in the bedroom maybe?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top