Very true. I am writing a paper at the my moment that landed in my inbox from a client on the stages of addiction - I usually travel write, blog and dabble in journalism as my livelihood but this looked interesting (considering I have been through and still am fighting an addiction).
But back to the point: Yeah, stage 1 is realisation. Loads of things can trigger this 'awakening', from having an overdose, your marriage fall apart, the threat of going to jail to hit that "rock bottom" place where suddenly you see with perfect clarity all the harm you have caused to yourself and others and how actually your drug of choice has the control over you, not the other way round anymore. These are just a few examples.
But then some hit another transitional phase between this and seeking help: A lot of people think once people realise they have a problem with drug use they will automatically go and seek help and immediately cut down their use lol No, it doesnt work like that. Often people will be so despaired at what they can see now they have done that will actually escalate their use for a while until they hit a deeper kind of "rock bottom" - or they might try getting off the drug themselves and fair and relapse harder (and this is where most the heroin overdoses occur - because users forget their tolerance goes down even after a few days of opiate abstinence so they use the same amount as when they had a tolerance). Then they will go and get help.
The old cliche is that "seeking help is half the battle" and in some ways this is true: No one likes to admit they are vulnerable infront of a stranger (be it doctor, rehab worker etc.) and we've been conditioned socially to think we are "weak" if we need some help in our lives. This is absolute nonsense. Everyone needs help, more than ever in this world, at certain stages of their lives. This is why it's though mental health problems occur in 2 in 3 (not 1 in 3) people at some point in their lives now, an dgod knows how many more are undiagnosed. It doesn't make you weak. It's a reflection of our society that is becoming less and less social, and less community orientated. Lots of people are isolated. The Dalai Lama calls it "Compartminlisation": You go to work in an isolated office cubicle, you get to/from in a cubicle on pubic transport or in your car, you get home and often your apartment is a cubicle too: Everything is basically a compartment in many people's lives and the fear driven into people by media makes people afraid of each other, afraid of smiling at strangers or chatting to them. For many this is the only life they know, and it's deeply sad and lonely. Is it any wonder mental health problems are an epidemic, addictions included?
But even once you get past that fear, many addicts then have the fear of change. Even if there lives were really shitty and they were having to steal everyday, lie to their loved ones everyday, do some awful things: Believe it or not they can still miss that life because they got so used to it. Like how war veterans get so used to horrific warzones they may get PTSD but still struggle deeply to adapt to 'normal life' back in the civilian world and they start to wish they were back out in those horrific conditions in warzones on the other side of the world. That's the funny way humans work and adapt to situations and environments that are hell.
But this is what most drug counselors understand completely, so there really is nothing to worry about. It's usually first on the list in therapy addressing all these fears of change and being stigmatised as an addict or losing friends: Most eventually soon see it as a wonderful opportunity to get past any mental health problems, get past their addictions and then really start discovering themselves more: New hobbies, going back to school (many end up becoming counselors themselves), even realising they are actually really good at art, writing etc and can make a living off of it. The opportunities start becoming clearer and clearer and more exciting. Suddenly sobriety doesn't seem so boring and daunting and you get a new sense of freedom now you have control of your life and self back, and you are wondering why you ever bothered with drugs.
Of course relapses to certain drugs happen a lot - but as long as lessons are learnt and it doesn't go back to full blown addiction then it's just a mistake - everyone makes them. It is how we learn and grow.
So yeah, be patient. I think you will be fine. It takes effort to make lifestyle changes and is scary as hell, but once you get passed that and the longer you stay sober and have a good support structure behind you it gets a lot easier day to day, week to week.
See this as an opportunity rather than a disaster and keep up your courage and I know you will be fine.
F'loki