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Alcoholism Thread v. A sober life is a good life <3

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I don't get drunk nearly as much anymore (maybe once or twice a week), but I always want booze. I'm always thinking about it. I'm always craving that refreshing feeling of having just chugged down a bunch of liquor, and feeling it rush over me.
 
day 3

last drink, well, ha, i dont remember what it was. but it was sometime friday night, or should i say in the early hours of saturday morning. been drinking heavily for 3-4 years and only just turned 21. biggest pause in my drinking is usually only ever 2 days. biggest break was only ever a couple weeks. often go through all night/all day binges that turn into days and days of drunkenness if im uninterrupted. i dont know why they start. but i know how they keep going: waking up depressed, anxious, and shaking..and fumbling for the bottle and taking a swig, and another. repeat, repeat, repeat.

ive been knowing i cant control it. but an incident friday night brought up and confirmed a lot of reasons why i need to stop. im ruining myself in so many ways.

it's been 2 nights without a drink.

im getting a hold of benzos soon to help with the sleeplessness and anxiety. dont know how long ill be able to get those, but im aiming to have them to get through the next week and weekend..:|
 
okay. i did it. 3 nights & days without drinking. it's only gonna get easier. right?


except i woke up & turned on pandora and gucci mane's 'wasted' was the first song on. pandora is making fun of me. ha.
 
recieved an ambulance fee of around $380.00 in the mail yesterday............
FUCK!
should never have drunk such dangerous amounts of liquor that night.
on lighter terms.. since that morning when i woke up in the back of an ambulance i have drastically cut down my drinking patterns. and it feels great!! after a while without drinking the days & weeks become more like personal milestones :)
however i did have a few on the weekend :eek: :eek: :eek: safe amounts mind you!!!!!
 
^^ I've been in hospital two times because of alcohol poisoning... Now I drink so much that with my tolerance I would have to drink a shitload of hard liquor to get in that condition.
 
I figure it would take me a 5th-and-a-half of 80 proof in a night to put me in the hospital. That's 40 fl. oz, give or take.

Of course, I would never drink that much. I find alcohol to be self-correcting after a certain point. Even drunk, I can tell when the negatives are outweighing the positives. Of course, it doesn't help when I pop a few OC20s into the mix, as the combination of alcohol/opiates dulls the negatives, allowing me to drink more.

No drinks since last Friday, but it was a rough Friday. Have had a full bottle of vodka in the freezer all week. Haven't felt like opening it. Besides, gotta study. Exams coming up in 10 days!
 
I justify myself as a functional drunk. Ha, what a joke, just because i don't seem wasted when i am does not make it excusable to drink like i do

i am drinking for all the wromg reasons at the moment, to kill anxiety, i am 29 and instead of getting a coffee like everyone else in my office at morning tea i go to the pub and have a bourbon, i know i need to stop now as it's a habit thats only going down hill, but god damn i love a drink, on my last wine for the night now (only because there is no store near me open) and it's a depressing thought

sorry i have had to edit this as i realised it was a sober thread, not the pathetic idiot thread that i fit into, maybe i need to start a new thread
 
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I am pretty proud of myself - no alcohol for 50 days today! how time flies! Pretty good going seeings as I couldn't even leave it alone for a day....
 
damnit damnit damnit. it started last night with a shot of jim beam and ended up with me leaving in the middle of night (and hiding the fact that i went to buy more from my sleeping boyfriend) to buy another bottle after i finished the first. then i poured some of the second bottle into the first in a pathetic attempt to hide that i drank all the first bottle. it worked. and when i woke up and drank more jim beam, 2 beers at lunch, and popped a xanax i realized this is going to be harder than i thought. but i am going to do it. i am going to quit drinking.
 
Two days out of jail, 32 days sober and moved into a halfway house today... I WILL make it work this time.
 
im drinking again, not much, bottle of wine tonight maybe. Its not the drinking that i bother about i love being drunk, the days after i dont get the hangovers you get when you were a teenager, i get the hangovers where your skin is crawling, you're shaking, and so anxious you cant bare to get out of bed. Bah well, another glass!
 
I don't know how you guys do it. I am on a week sober after relapsing again for the 7th time. The longest I've went is about 2 years when I was living with a girl that asked me to stop if we were gonna get married, but when that fell through I went right back to booze and coke.

Really struggling with it. I feel as if I lost all my friends when I get sober, and, in general, I just miss the scene and being out and bars and shit. I feel so lonely and depressed, but I'm really trying to stick with it. I really am a menace to society and myself if even a drop of liquor touches my mouth. I can't even be around people drinking and not join in.

Sigh...curse the day alcohol was invented.
 
This week was stupid. I've been looking at the AA meeting schedule again 8)

I'm studying abroad this summer, and cannot be drinking while im doing that. I know i'll make some really shitty and dangerous bad decisions if i'm in another country getting wasted.

I have the determination to stop drinking---until about 9:30 each night.

I should be making art. Bbbrrrgggagagajjhsjnfdkhcdklludhflendlclsn
 
I gave up heavy drinking last July and could not be happier! After abstaining for a long enough time you realize how awful alcohol is on your body and mind. I drink in moderation (beer/wine) and enjoy it MUCH more than drinking to get drunk. It's just the way you think about it and your intentions for doing it, self medicating is not a REASON to drink.
 
promethazine, will it help or make things worse? trying to come off a recent drink and g binge.
 
bignbrown said:
promethazine, will it help or make things worse? trying to come off a recent drink and g binge.
Click to expand...

it may help settle your stomach (any maybe your nerves a bit as well) and help you get some sleep

can't see how it would hurt.
 
Today's the day. I normally start drinking at 5:30pm. I took an ativan instead. (I've been planning this, so I have a little stockpile.) I don't really crave a drink yet. Want one, of course, but it's the way I want dinner. In a couple hours, we'll see. I know I've got a shitty night ahead of me, but that's nothing new.

Mostly I'm nervous about the withdrawal symptoms.

I'll check in later to let you know.
 
I don't like to drink at all because if I do end up having alcohol I binge drink. The only time I do drink alcohol is to get drunk because if I wasn't going to I mine as well had a coke. My reasoning is pretty bad.... I'm not an alcoholic but an occasional drinker but I can see the possibility of it getting worse if I don't take precautions. Alcoholism runs on my fathers side so I try as much as I can not to drink. I'm not even twenty one yet which is the sad thing.
 
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