Heroin advice on getting off H- please help

[ShroomySatori]

When are people most likely to relapse? I am in the second week of an abrupt taper. I find the oxycodone withdrawal to be particularly harsh. I think that duration of use matters as much as dose does. My dose isn't anything crazy, but my duration of use is very long. I am still taking 40mg and the withdrawal is extreme. that is 1 quarter of what I was taking before and it was what I abruptly tapered to. Don't get my wrong the withdrawal could be so, so much worse and I have a lot of weed and diazepam but I don't feel right. I heard it takes 10 days or so for the brain to start producing endorphins again. I've never made it past where I am now and last time I relapsed I sniffed 20mg oxy and I regret it so bad. I had been bedridden for a week and couldn't take it anymore. That's how I feel right now except 9 months later the withdrawal is hellishly worse, and I have way more responsibilities.

Why can't I ever make it easy on myself and quit when I have the free time.

I am writing because I feel a strong urge to relapse. I have so many of them laying around. I want the pain relief, the worst symptom has been my back pain coming back full force. I have been at war with myself for over a week now while trying to appear normal at work. I am very restless. I can't sleep at night. If I have been fucking around with this stuff for a few years, I am just wondering how long it takes to stabilize.

I can see myself starting to take more and feeling really good. I take great care of myself on pills. Healthy diet, good work ethic, social... then I completely fall apart when I try not even ct just a taper. It's fucked how addictive this stuff is, I can literally feel my bones aching for it. I guess I am looking for somebody who understands that going back to a high dose might help me in the short term but in the long term I'm screwing myself over. I know that's true but the draw to those pills is very strong.

 

[Sw1tch]

Don't do it. You can get through this. You should check out other people's stories in the addiction forums and see how they made it through. I personally have come off heroin and that's a bitch in it's own right. The best thing I'd suggest is try kratom while it's still legal which helped me significantly. All you have to remember is doing it one more time means going back to being dependent on a hellish drug prescribed by big pharma.

Think about the pain you're experiencing now from withdrawing. Don't let it be for nothing or you'll soon have to suffer again. It's NOT worth going through withdrawals only to end right back where you started. Please for the sake of everyone stay strong!

 

[Ilove2nod]

I heard there is this dragon, that only plays. The dragon runs and runs, but get this, you can't catch'em. At first it's pleasant, but eventually, it gets old and .... I heard Valium is much friendlier if you have a nice shrink.

HAHAHAHA! very good way to put it Speed King!

And Flakka: Don't do it. Don't even think about it. Heroin is like this. It starts out feeling godly I wont lie, then very quickly turns into spending hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars chasing the high you once felt that first time and have to keep doing more and more of it just to keep from being dopesick. And that high you once felt eventually just gets harder and harder to get again. Not to mention its dangerous as hell to play with, its not like playing with fire, its more like playing with an atomic bomb! Not worth all the money it costs, the risk of overdosing at any time(especially with all the fentanyl laced dope all over), the risk of getting locked up trying to get it on the streets(as that is where it usually is), also the waiting game while your dopesick blowing up every person you know who has it while having them all say "I'm not around right now, wont have anything til later." until you are so desperate you will go to any hood and ride around trying to find someone open-air that you don't know at all who just might rip you off... the list goes on and on why you should not try heroin. Don't.

 

[Effect]

Not to sound like a hard ass at all, but rather just to make sure your approaching this with the right state of mind and not with one that is clouded by a temporary lack of funds.

A lot of people in your spot, when the money is gone and they can no longer afford their drug of choice, think in their heads that what they want is to get off the opiates (not to say that deep down you truly don't want to rid yourself of that evil monkey on your back) and quit for good, but in reality if they came up on a decent sum of cash, the first person they'd be calling is their dealer.

Like I said, in a perfect scenario, you really would do what's best for yourself and take the good advice that people gave and go through the few rough days of acute withdrawals and spend the next few rough months of post-acute withdrawals getting by on the knowledge that this will be the only time you'll ever have to do this and that easy passing week will be a little better than the last, but the majority of people (myself included) aren't able to make this a reality and it's not due to a lack of will power, but that addiction is truly a cunning enemy and people that just started doing heroin who hang on to the attitude of "I'm not that bad because I have not and will not ever use a needle" are actually just still in the early stages of where their using can potentially take them and in your case it might be even more difficult because the reason you started with opiates in the first place is based on an underlying medical condition that is linked to and causes chronic pain that hasn't been thoroughly treated/cured.

I'm really not trying to tell you what you don't wanna hear to be a dick and I'm definitely not trying to tell you not to give quitting a good attempt, but just don't want you to go into the process blindly just to be let down if you aren't successful.

I'd look into trying a proper kratom taper (while you can still get it legally before the ban goes into effect or using a reasonable and responsible dose of clonidine and benzos to try and get off while minimizing as much discomfort as possible especially if finding buprenorphine (suboxone/subutex) is not a viable option in your area.

 

[Hipster427]

I havent touched H in over 3 weeks, and btw, I never touched a needle-
So I switched back over to my love of Roxie's and my homeboy tried hard to get me to use a needle, saying that I would cut the number of pills I snort in half. But I didn't give in ( yay me!)
For everyone wanting to know if they should try H, I wouldn't do it. Yeah it is a lot cheaper than pills but your tolerance seems to build up a hella lot quicker with the h. I went from spending like 70$ a day or two to spending 200-250$ every other day or so. For me, only the first couple of days did I get high from the H. Maybe I wasn't doing enough or it could have just been shitty h. Those first few days of doing the h, I would feel good and get my nod on a little bit but it just kept making me go to sleep. It made me so sleepy that I didn't even have to take my ambien and that's very unusual. But, I don't recommend anyone doing H,tolerance builds up too quick and becomes VERY expensive, you never know exactly what you are gettin or how it's gonna make you feel, and frankly it's not worth the risk of having to go pick it up and ride around with it. For the short time I was doing the h, I felt SO guilty. Like the amount of guilt I was carrying around just fucked with my mind and my anxiety. I couldn't believe I had actually gave in and tried the shit, much less did it for a few weeks. All I could think about while doing it was " if only my girl (who is the love of my life) knew about this shit she would put me in rehab or leave me. And that would be the end of the world for me. That's literally all I could think about- was the heartbreak I would be causing the love of my life. ( sorry for being cheesey)
So imo, I wouldn't give in and try it. You'll regret it later. Sorry for the long post.