lyricabuddy
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 31, 2011
- Messages
- 111
So, I believe this is my third thread on experiencing extreme hallucinations on nitrous which appear to be out of the spectrum of effects for nitrous, and possibly things from another dimension (please continue reading).
My first thread was about the first time I experienced said hallucinations, the second thread was when I hallucinated that I was experiencing catastrophic brain damage and I was concerned. Now, it's gotten even worse and much, much crazier.
It all started when I unfortunately decided to take some amphetamines (Sunday) (just 100 mg vyvanse, and I rarely do this anymore). The night before (Saturday) I had gone out drinkking and smoked a bunch of weed, and for some reason, when I took the Vyvanse, I just didn't feel quite right.
I decided to try some whippets. Big mistake.
By the time I got to the third box I was feeling things inside my head squirm around like crazy. Just like the other times, as crazy as it was, I brushed it off, just telling myself that I was tripping and that I will not be harmed by nos.
Today, I did some research, and found this is a common occurance leading up to the opening of the third eye, and possibly at least a partial explanation for some of my other hallucinations.
Next, I felt a series of events go on inside and around my brain. My understanding of what was going on, was that something was trying to warn me not to do anymore nitrous. For example first it was a chisel chipping away at my brain matter, then I heard what I interpreted as a chain saw making long cuts around the outside of my brain, then it was like little razor blade nicks starting on one side of my brain and working its way all the way around covering my entire brain.
Each hit was a new type of these hallucinations, and my interpretation was something was saying: "you better stop, or else..."
Finally, came the hallucination, and distinct feeling, that a stick (representing soomething like dynamite was being lodged into the center of my brain). My interpretation here was: "do you choose life, or death?" As in, are you willing to die to continue using nitrous, and death, as in a more general sense vs. acute death, but still...
Now, I know all of this sounds silly, that was my thought exactly, that's why I decided to take the next hit.
What happened next was I started feeling my brain essentially start to split open in the middle, and also elongate front to back, with little popping feelings. At this point I was like "huh, that's really wierd, and I'm not really having a good time, but honestly, what's the worst that could happen." So, I decided to take another, curious as to what would happen next, but I also didn't want to let something, or some thought control me, I felt like it was my right to do whatever I want.
And this is where the really freaky stuff happened, and I'm not expecting everyone to believe me, but I had to get this out there.
After that last hit, almost instantaneously a crater-like vortex opened up, consumung the entire right side of my head. It was like my skin and bone was gone and my brain was exposed via this crater, about the size of a softball. It was like an orb had penetrated in the right side of my brain, and it was swirling around in my head rapidly and making this really weird noise like something out of a video game. Like what you would expect something swirling around in flesh and blood really fast would sound like, only with the addition of an electronic element, like this low-pitched humming sound. This lasted for about 10-15 seconds.
This was 100% real to me as it was going on. My fiirst thoughts were: how am I going to live the rest of my life with this huge hole in my head, and what am I going to tell my parents, this will ruin them. At first I was even to afraid to touch what I thought was the inside of my head. After a while though, I finally did it, and to my complete surprise, there was no crater! But that doesn't take away from the fact that at that point my sanity was completely fucked with the prospect of something penetrating into my soul.
So, the next day, I thought I would be fine, right? Nope. Every time I take any drug, even phenibut and gabapentin. my head keeps splitting open in the middle and I keep ketting these swirling sensations inside my head where it feels like someone is licking their thumb and pressing / moving it around the inside of my head. It was very frightening when it happened at first and I was sober, then I got over it, but then it wouldn't go away and my forehead & middle of my head started getting sore so again, I got freaked out, and started reading the bible outloud, because I didn't know what else to do, and I've denounced Christianity to my entire family years ago. This is how worked up this thing has got me.
Of course I was freaked out, I'm seeing a priest today because I can't afford a psychologist. Plus, I know they will see me right away. But if any of you have any advice that would be huge. Not knowing whether or not I'm possessed is killing me. This is the second day after it happened and it still feels like things ar pressing up against the inside of my skull and moving around.
PS - The reason I'm inclined to think I might have gotten possesed, is that from the research I've done, opening the third eye under the wrong (malicious, hedonistic etc...) circumstances, can allow demons to enter, because it gives them ground to stand on. The fact that I continued to do more whippets after presenting myself with the question "do you choose life or death", I feel might have opened the wrong doorway for demons.
My first thread was about the first time I experienced said hallucinations, the second thread was when I hallucinated that I was experiencing catastrophic brain damage and I was concerned. Now, it's gotten even worse and much, much crazier.
It all started when I unfortunately decided to take some amphetamines (Sunday) (just 100 mg vyvanse, and I rarely do this anymore). The night before (Saturday) I had gone out drinkking and smoked a bunch of weed, and for some reason, when I took the Vyvanse, I just didn't feel quite right.
I decided to try some whippets. Big mistake.
By the time I got to the third box I was feeling things inside my head squirm around like crazy. Just like the other times, as crazy as it was, I brushed it off, just telling myself that I was tripping and that I will not be harmed by nos.
Today, I did some research, and found this is a common occurance leading up to the opening of the third eye, and possibly at least a partial explanation for some of my other hallucinations.
Next, I felt a series of events go on inside and around my brain. My understanding of what was going on, was that something was trying to warn me not to do anymore nitrous. For example first it was a chisel chipping away at my brain matter, then I heard what I interpreted as a chain saw making long cuts around the outside of my brain, then it was like little razor blade nicks starting on one side of my brain and working its way all the way around covering my entire brain.
Each hit was a new type of these hallucinations, and my interpretation was something was saying: "you better stop, or else..."
Finally, came the hallucination, and distinct feeling, that a stick (representing soomething like dynamite was being lodged into the center of my brain). My interpretation here was: "do you choose life, or death?" As in, are you willing to die to continue using nitrous, and death, as in a more general sense vs. acute death, but still...
Now, I know all of this sounds silly, that was my thought exactly, that's why I decided to take the next hit.
What happened next was I started feeling my brain essentially start to split open in the middle, and also elongate front to back, with little popping feelings. At this point I was like "huh, that's really wierd, and I'm not really having a good time, but honestly, what's the worst that could happen." So, I decided to take another, curious as to what would happen next, but I also didn't want to let something, or some thought control me, I felt like it was my right to do whatever I want.
And this is where the really freaky stuff happened, and I'm not expecting everyone to believe me, but I had to get this out there.
After that last hit, almost instantaneously a crater-like vortex opened up, consumung the entire right side of my head. It was like my skin and bone was gone and my brain was exposed via this crater, about the size of a softball. It was like an orb had penetrated in the right side of my brain, and it was swirling around in my head rapidly and making this really weird noise like something out of a video game. Like what you would expect something swirling around in flesh and blood really fast would sound like, only with the addition of an electronic element, like this low-pitched humming sound. This lasted for about 10-15 seconds.
This was 100% real to me as it was going on. My fiirst thoughts were: how am I going to live the rest of my life with this huge hole in my head, and what am I going to tell my parents, this will ruin them. At first I was even to afraid to touch what I thought was the inside of my head. After a while though, I finally did it, and to my complete surprise, there was no crater! But that doesn't take away from the fact that at that point my sanity was completely fucked with the prospect of something penetrating into my soul.
So, the next day, I thought I would be fine, right? Nope. Every time I take any drug, even phenibut and gabapentin. my head keeps splitting open in the middle and I keep ketting these swirling sensations inside my head where it feels like someone is licking their thumb and pressing / moving it around the inside of my head. It was very frightening when it happened at first and I was sober, then I got over it, but then it wouldn't go away and my forehead & middle of my head started getting sore so again, I got freaked out, and started reading the bible outloud, because I didn't know what else to do, and I've denounced Christianity to my entire family years ago. This is how worked up this thing has got me.
Of course I was freaked out, I'm seeing a priest today because I can't afford a psychologist. Plus, I know they will see me right away. But if any of you have any advice that would be huge. Not knowing whether or not I'm possessed is killing me. This is the second day after it happened and it still feels like things ar pressing up against the inside of my skull and moving around.
PS - The reason I'm inclined to think I might have gotten possesed, is that from the research I've done, opening the third eye under the wrong (malicious, hedonistic etc...) circumstances, can allow demons to enter, because it gives them ground to stand on. The fact that I continued to do more whippets after presenting myself with the question "do you choose life or death", I feel might have opened the wrong doorway for demons.
Last edited:
J/P, well, kinda
