RRJ31337
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 24, 2016
- Messages
- 70
Hey, so basically like 4-5 months ago back in about september i was smoking crack , shooting , snorting coke and heroin , popping xanax like candy, smoking pounds of pot, snorting as much trazadone as i could before my nose clogged Absolutly depressed.
I met a girl (long story short she found out she was moving in a few months so we couldnt date) well she made me promise not to do anymore heroin and ever since ive just been depressed.
I still have my crackpipes and dealers number but its like when i even think of getting high off crack or coke i just become more depressed. I was in a very specific mental state when i was smoking crack and i know if i did id go right back to that state. I have no desire to do coke because all it makes me wanna do is more and more and drink a bottle then i wake up with no memory of the fun but 100 bad consequences.
(the last time i got very coked out i got into a fight with my ex and she wrecked my car and i have no memory of it)
All i do now is smoke weed, i want to quit it so bad but ive attempted it several times and it takes me to a very bad mental state.
I really really dont wanna bitch about things that everyone goes thru but basically, this girl that i made the promise too asked me to move in with her in the state that she went to. I told her how i loved her and basically ever since then theres been less and less communication daily. I used to talk to her ALL night EVERY night and that became my new addiction.
Before we started talking every night my vince to pacify my mind was drugs.
Now the thought of them depresses me, all i want is heroin because it made me not care but i know better. Ive been drinking every night for the past week. I just wish i could turn my mind off.
Has anyone else ever gotten too depressed to do drugs?
Edit: (Sorry if this post seems kinda everywhere, like i said ive been drinking for the past week and tonight is no exception)
I met a girl (long story short she found out she was moving in a few months so we couldnt date) well she made me promise not to do anymore heroin and ever since ive just been depressed.
I still have my crackpipes and dealers number but its like when i even think of getting high off crack or coke i just become more depressed. I was in a very specific mental state when i was smoking crack and i know if i did id go right back to that state. I have no desire to do coke because all it makes me wanna do is more and more and drink a bottle then i wake up with no memory of the fun but 100 bad consequences.
(the last time i got very coked out i got into a fight with my ex and she wrecked my car and i have no memory of it)
All i do now is smoke weed, i want to quit it so bad but ive attempted it several times and it takes me to a very bad mental state.
I really really dont wanna bitch about things that everyone goes thru but basically, this girl that i made the promise too asked me to move in with her in the state that she went to. I told her how i loved her and basically ever since then theres been less and less communication daily. I used to talk to her ALL night EVERY night and that became my new addiction.
Before we started talking every night my vince to pacify my mind was drugs.
Now the thought of them depresses me, all i want is heroin because it made me not care but i know better. Ive been drinking every night for the past week. I just wish i could turn my mind off.
Has anyone else ever gotten too depressed to do drugs?
Edit: (Sorry if this post seems kinda everywhere, like i said ive been drinking for the past week and tonight is no exception)