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Vent/Rant Thread vs 3 (Triggering Content)

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Nutty - I'm sorry for what's going on, especially at Christmas. All you can do is take care of yourself. I can't/ wont give you any advice as I don't know the situation n it's not my place to but I am here for you n hope things sort out soon xxx
 
Ffs i'm extremely PISSED OFF! That school is so nickpicky n anal over the slightest thing. Put little one in after school club was busy a day n ran to the supermarket so get some things quickly as I'll have little one for two weeks n won't be able to get her stuff as she'll be tbere. The lady was anal n rushing off for an appointment. 1 if you've got an appointment get someone else to run the fkn afterschool club n 2 I was a few minutes late due to people over reacting over one fkn day. Really annoyed. I don't have a car to get quickly round or a fkn partner - I do it all on my own. I did not sot on my bum all day I went to the doctors , helped my mam with cash n carry as she's torn a muscle n obviously in pain. Then I went to collect some herbalife stuff I'd pre-ordered from the gym then to get a few more presents for child, then to a recovery meeting Do I get any understanding no. Well if it continues she'll go going elsewhere. So i had to rush to supermarket to get wrapping paper, cat food, milk etc.

Also why are they saying that no children go to afterschool club for tbe last hour of 4 to 5 pm????? Surely people work don't?!!! Well they need to put their children somewhere. Fkn wound me up this has.
 
rant about my hone

my grandfather just sit watching tv and permanently farts,thats ok,we all fart,problem is he open window maybe three times a year,he hates to spend money for hot water in radiator to bring up the heat of room that was lost in the time while his farts flew outa window into winterland


this affect not only living room but also central part of home

my grandmother smoke around whole house sometimes but allways atleast light up cigg inside before go to balcony,and even when she is outside whe never close the door and the smoke goes inside,she also drops ash everywhere mainly in sink on porcelain and cups.

remember that central part part of home that suffera from not enogh ventilation and farts? thats where we dry our laundry,i wash only in water,no toxic chemicals,but after i told my grandmother about health problems of these things i think she doubled the dosage,so the poisonous fumes stay i that unventilated part of house i need to go there everyday milion times parabens and phtalates are no joke.

my grand mother hates me for any kind of ventilation,the air in my home is low on oxygen,full of farts,chemicals,smoke toxins...

i have no authority here,any kind of effort to talk failed becose these people are stupid and old,age related mental decline is no myth


anytime i leave my room i hold breath,i do this for years tell me this is how normal family and home should be
 
I going to merge this thread with the vent rant thread.. as thats where a rant loves to live.. I feel for you though.
 
DOB said:
these people are stupid and old,age related mental decline is no myth

anytime i leave my room i hold breath,i do this for years tell me this is how normal family and home should be
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I hear you on the old age mental decline, but consider also elderly folks get set in their ways and feel happy that way. How old are your grandparents? My pops is only 67 but damn since he retired he started really slipping. You wouldn't last an hour in my house because he smokes at least 3 packs a day (in the house), doesn't shower and misses when he uses the toilet every time. I could go on but what's the use, believe me I know how it feels.

The farts part is disgusting. You can offer him some pro-biotic capsules, that's supposed to help for digestive issues. Another thing, I'm not sure what your budget is, you can buy an air purifier. I had an Oreck that worked pretty well in one room but they get dirty quick. At least your grandma smokes outside. It sucks having to deal with irritating family members. Noise pollution from the super loud tv is the worst for me, it's inescapable.

Good idea merging NSA, I could rant all day about this stuff.
 
^ I love your heart TC

Oh shit my kido might end up having the flu for christmas.. ugg,
 
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I need to vent. I've tried so hard to get rid of all that anger , to be a better person. I want to treat people how I'd want to be treated myself. If someone wants /needs support I want to help any way I can. So why are people trying to rile me n get me in trouble. I explained that It's my birthday in a few days n how things were last year n how this year I want/need tot to be different.
I really started to feel that I belong here on BL n I don't want to be the angry person I used to be. I understand that not everyone is going to like everyone n so I place people on ignore so not to get wound up over things. But it's upsetting when people try to wind me up to try and get me into trouble especially at Christmas. Why be so cruel n mean? I admit I haven't been an angel but I've tried to change all that just like most of us with addictions haven't been angels but are allowed to change. If people don't like me put me on ignore n move on. Vent over.

This has upset me n not how I want to feel this time of year.
 
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I did something so stupid yesterday and I'm actually really worried for once. I put my health on the fucking line again, and I hope nothing ends up resulting from this stupid mistake. It's not even the first time it happened, but the second, and this time I knew right from wrong. My cousin came home from work and I told her that I did something stupid again... she knew what it was before I even said it. She was so upset and then asked me if she could slap me. I told her she could and stood right up... she ended up slapping me, but it wasn't an actual slap. I wish she actually did though. Ugh. I really messed up this time and this mistake could truly flip my life upside down.
 
^stayfaded I'm not sure of the mistake you have done but let me tell you that I have done a lot of mistakes and fuckups myself. All I can say is that I've overcome them and accepted parts of the damages I've done. You can't turn back time and undo the mistake but you keep learning from these mistakes and you learn to forgive yourself in time.

Life is full of obstacles and pain but we need these to be stronger to be smarter. Without these challenges we will stay in the position where we won't be able to handle tough decisions and things that we are supposed to. So chin up and charge to experience.
 
Maya said:
^stayfaded I'm not sure of the mistake you have done but let me tell you that I have done a lot of mistakes and fuckups myself. All I can say is that I've overcome them and accepted parts of the damages I've done. You can't turn back time and undo the mistake but you keep learning from these mistakes and you learn to forgive yourself in time.

Life is full of obstacles and pain but we need these to be stronger to be smarter. Without these challenges we will stay in the position where we won't be able to handle tough decisions and things that we are supposed to. So chin up and charge to experience.
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Thank you and I know I shouldn't dwell... but I really really fucked up!! It's a high chance of something going wrong :( hopefully it's not something that can never be fixed. I know shit happens and we need to get over obstacles, but if what I'm worried about happens.... I'm like 90% sure I'll kill myself.
 
I've lost a lot of motivation in life recently. Lost the girl I liked and had to cut all connection with her, then two days later I lose my job. Not the best way to move on after losing the girl you liked and talked to everyday for so many months, but shit happens?

I'm finding it really hard to get out of this rutt. I've been pretty good over the past few months with no abusing drugs. I would smoke weed a couple times in those few months and drink a bit. A month ago I abused weed and benzos and even used IV meth again. Since then everything's just gone down hill.

I don't know why I allow myself to get in these situations. I have to pay bills every week and repayments on loans. Yet last Tuesday I woke up and simply 'couldn't be fucked' smoked a bong and didn't even let my boss know I wasn't coming in until the next day.

This seems to happen at least once a year. The exact same thing happend this time last year, it's a bit funny. I was posting in here last Xmas about losing my job, losing friends and this girl I liked, not having any money for Xmas or new years..a year later, in the same position..accept a bit more stable housing wise back at my mums. She's not going to be happy when she finds out I don't have a job anymore and asks me for money I owe her.. Ergh.

All I can think about is smoking weed. Yet I'm broke, completely broke but still urge my mates to tick me.

I'm finding it hard to get that one step up in life again. Obviously I need a job, that is the priority ATM. But even applying to, or getting to job interviews is a task in itself. I've got some pretty serious social anxietys that I've never properly dealt with. I keep telling myself and others 'I need to see a psych already, the way I think isn't healthy' but I never take action. Subconsciously I tell myself 'I don't have a car, it's too much effort' but that's just a cover for 'I'm lazy as fuck and will use any excuse I can find'

I have a job trial tomorrow. It's a two hour train ride just there. It's not practical for me to even apply for this being so far away, but I need cash so I can buy my mother a Xmas present and pay a bill. I know it's not likely I will go to this job trial, as much as I need to do it..all these social barriers come up and all I can think to get me through it is 'I need Valium'
 
Awh floatingaround I'm very sorry this is happening to you.

It is hard to break ties with someone you like/love n it's hard losing a job. I can empathise but them happening together is tough.

If you have no other way of earning money take this other job in the meantime. Calculate the cost of travelling to n from there n maybe see if you could hire a room somewhere for five days. I'm assuming it's for five days Monday to Friday? Correct me if I'm wrong. If it's not practical then travel there until you find something better. Employers are more likely to hire someone who is in a job than someone who is not in a job. Plus you travelling to and from for two hours will show your employers.

Now about this happening to you once a year. Maybe that is due to the stress of the holidays??? Could you go for counselling to work through why why this happens in order to stop this happening over n over again?
Of course I can't tell you what to do n this is only advice. I really hope that things work out for you soon n that you can stop going through this hurt.

Evey
 
xstayfadedx said:
Thank you and I know I shouldn't dwell... but I really really fucked up!! It's a high chance of something going wrong :( hopefully it's not something that can never be fixed. I know shit happens and we need to get over obstacles, but if what I'm worried about happens.... I'm like 90% sure I'll kill myself.
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Aw stayfaded<3

I really hope what you're worried about does not happen, I'd hate to see you hurt yourself :\
 
Some birthday this is when no one can spend time cause they're all busy. I fkn hate having a birthday at christmas. Well used to blending in the background so what's new :(
 
That's sad if it's your birthday today Eveleivibe.
I guess folk who have birthdays over the xmas period must miss out a bit as everyones attention is focussed on Xmas instead.
You only have one birthday a year unless you are the Queen of course so when it is your birthday you want to be spoilt for the day and made to feel a bit special.
Thinking of you Eveleivibe.
 
Hiya Max, it's nothing compared with what you're going through? I was just venting lol. How are you doing? Plus I'm having a drink as my brother bought me a bottle of wine. Here if you ever need anyone to talk to xxx
 
I feel absolutely fine thanks Evel,looking forward to spending time relaxing at home with my best mate.
Enjoy your wine, drink & be merry tis the time of year and all that.
Thanks for the support mate. Hope you enjoy a good xmas and have everything you want in the new year. x
 
Hope your day turns out better Evey <3 Happy Birthday!

I opened a box with a Christmas snowglobe and as I wound it up, I started blubbering like a baby. I miss my son terribly.
I hate crying. This sucks!
 
Lets just say i'm in my overdraft by £900 n owe £4,000 to credit card n no matter how hard I try I cant get
Out of it. This happened from buying lots of codeine but hayho not a real addiction like herion eh hahaba i'm ding
My usua n denying it n acting like alls wel with world hahaha oh fuck its
 
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