TDS The Suicide Support Thread

[Mafioso]

I think that's a good idea to talk to your doctor/psych, Audiobook.

In the meantime, if things start getting too intense.. try to take some deep breaths and remind yourself that some(maybe even a lot) of what your experiencing is the drug withdrawal. Self-harm is pretty common when coming off antidepressants, so I imagine that it must be pretty brutal to go through.

Is there anything else going on that you'd like to talk about? Or even just talk about how you are feeling, we are listening.

 

[RV Mystery Journey]

I had a guy tell me about how he recently tried to kill himself in the manner Robin Williams did at a job I just quit like an idiot failure quitter manchild loser but I ain't suicidal here.

I had no idea what to say like how do you respond to that effectively so I just poked "good to see you are doing better" and I have no clue but he liked the job and I hope being home with his mom now will help him find a better place but I am outta his workplace now.

The scary thing is I don't think that guy got help and is still drinking (hotel manager in Vegas found his kill setup with more than a few empty bottles of vodka against the wall before he moved back to his pleading mother, looks older very scary story). He would go into details you just don't need to at work with coworkers you aren't close friends with lol. Anyways the way he left the story is I don't know if he was still planning on it.

A girl told me who lives me she is and I need to treat her like a guest and keep her happy at all costs. I didn't know what to say but I feel if I need help I should call a hotline on her behalf and ask them what to do. Maybe tell someone she lives me for starters but it is like I can't right now. I did not kidnap her but I might have hypnotized her accidentally.

 

[Captain.Heroin]

I had a guy tell me about how he recently tried to kill himself in the manner Robin Williams did at a job I just quit like an idiot failure quitter manchild loser but I ain't suicidal here.

I had no idea what to say like how do you respond to that effectively so I just poked "good to see you are doing better" and I have no clue but he liked the job and I hope being home with his mom now will help him find a better place but I am outta his workplace now.

The scary thing is I don't think that guy got help and is still drinking (hotel manager in Vegas found his kill setup with more than a few empty bottles of vodka against the wall before he moved back to his pleading mother, looks older very scary story). He would go into details you just don't need to at work with coworkers you aren't close friends with lol. Anyways the way he left the story is I don't know if he was still planning on it.

A girl told me who lives me she is and I need to treat her like a guest and keep her happy at all costs. I didn't know what to say but I feel if I need help I should call a hotline on her behalf and ask them what to do. Maybe tell someone she lives me for starters but it is like I can't right now. I did not kidnap her but I might have hypnotized her accidentally.

Sometimes the only way to respond is "do you want to talk about it?" or "I'm glad you're still here". Maybe even a "if you are feeling that way, reach out to someone: people care".

It can be hard/impossible to respond to certain things like that.

A suicide attempt = normally a predictor for a future one.

Sometimes you can let a few days pass and hit them up/next time you see them (not sure if you have text/online contact?) and just say "hey was just wondering how you're feeling", that can help.

 

[Shady's Fox]

Now lemme confess my sin. Few years ago I had suicidal thoughts, gloomy swamp I was in. I've been in the fog, I got out. I saw snow, I knew I was conscious. The rush that I've felt in those moments, the panicking strike in those 15 Sec, I knew that I made the biggest mistake of my life. Then, I've learnt to trully appreciate human life, my life. Because if the curtain closes, I know I will spend my time in eternal nothingness and that's way too Shady for me, I am afraid. And so please, dear reader, whoever you are, there's light! We are here for you! Please, look up in the Sky, see those planets/stars/galaxies? We are unique, much love ♥

 

[sewerslide.666mg]

it's good to be safe but fascinated by death this is a cool thread

 

[Painful One]

it's good to be safe but fascinated by death this is a cool thread

I think I have come closer to death than almost anyone in this world.
I had an awesome Near Death Experience.
I have not read or heard of another that came close to my NDE.

It hurt like hell but I gained enlightened from it.

Death is not the end. It is just the beginning.

We need you ALL here though. You are so important and loved.
Way more than you know.

 

[TJ5]

Hey guys, hope everyones doing okay! Little background on me: Have been a heroin user for the past 6 years, hopping on and off from Subs and diesel, and even when I use very small amounts of suboxone, and or go on a 2 day dope bingem when I stop taking everything the withdrawals are quite unbearable, and it really starts making me go crazy, as if just ending it all would be such a relief to all this pain.
Will that horrible feeling ever go away? I have some weed and Xanax but I can never make it past the 2nd day and that's when the dark thoughts start clouding my mind.

I should really be feeling better by the 3-4th day for sure, am I correct? its mainly the restless legs that drive me mad. I cant tell if im just being a bitch about it or im just that mentally week, but for some reason I just cant mentally handle it.

Any tips would be appreciated on how to mentally break through this barrier. Im gonna start working out and eating well, with hot baths and shit and hopefully that will help. we'll see.
how can I mentally distract myself, and convert all the negativity to more positive thinking

- d-nihl

What I did was to keep my mind and my hands occupied. For me, that usually involved a lot of typing. I would also try soft music and meditation or go on youtube for some guided meditation.

 

[matthew m]

Welcome to the new Suicide Support Thread.


The last edition can be found here in TDS archives section.

We also have an extensive list of mental health support and resources, which can be found here!

Please do not hesitate in venting out your feelings in here.

And don't hesitate to send a personal message to myself or any other Recovery moderator if needed ​

Welcome to the new Suicide Support Thread.


The last edition can be found here in TDS archives section.

We also have an extensive list of mental health support and resources, which can be found here!

Please do not hesitate in venting out your feelings in here.

And don't hesitate to send a personal message to myself or any other Recovery moderator if needed ​

personally I believe strongly in suicide though it goes against the grain of our culture (you can make it if you try, true grit, etc.) I don't think lifer is inherently worth living, I don't believe that kindergarden shit about how we all have a unique purpose or destiny. The fact of the matter is killing yourself is difficult. But if you really were going to go through with it think that at that moment you can do whatever you want i.e. act with no inhibitions. Camus said something like that then he died in a car accident. Plus he was smart and good looking so why was he mulling suicide. Here's a depressing stat. most people who do themselves are old men. you slave away your whole life and after retirement you have shit to look forward to. sorry but it's true. They ought to found a company, a suicide squad, (not the movie), who kill you (painlessly?) for a fee. darknet type shit.

 

[matthew m]

personally I believe strongly in suicide though it goes against the grain of our culture (you can make it if you try, true grit, etc.) I don't think lifer is inherently worth living, I don't believe that kindergarden shit about how we all have a unique purpose or destiny. The fact of the matter is killing yourself is difficult. But if you really were going to go through with it think that at that moment you can do whatever you want i.e. act with no inhibitions. Camus said something like that then he died in a car accident. Plus he was smart and good looking so why was he mulling suicide. Here's a depressing stat. most people who do themselves are old men. you slave away your whole life and after retirement you have shit to look forward to. sorry but it's true. They ought to found a company, a suicide squad, (not the movie), who kill you (painlessly?) for a fee. darknet type shit.

 

[matthew m]

I fucking hate sobriety. the world is such that I want to walk through it completely fucked up. I wish there was a God so I could hate Him. I hate life. Life is a fucking waste of energy. Does anybody realize that Sartre's being and nothingness is basically a philosophy of depression?

 

[mal3volent]

What's got you thinking like this man? Maybe take a break from the philosophy stuff?

 

[Lil'LinaptkSix]

I fucking hate sobriety.

I feel ya. I am never complexly sober at any time. Gave up one that a long time ago. Just had to tweak my usage so that it becomes manageable and quality of life is raised in my domain.
Hope all is manageable on your side?
What substance(s) do you like the most? Got a job or riding out the fuckin virus like the rest of us almost homeless MFs without? LOL JK but they need to get rid os this pretzle shoit before the next mutation comes along. Damn.
Holla back?
One
ptah

 

[empeebee]

IMO? My 2c?

There are only 2 conditions under which this action is acceptable to the 'self'.

1. Suffering with an unbearably painful, incurable, terminal disease in which medicine cannot help relieve your suffering & where those you care about you understand and can live with your action without pain
2. Where the rest of your life, however years that may be, are 100% guaranteed to cause more pain and suffering to those who care about you than your action (emphasis on guaranteed, but ironically, there are no guarantees in life).So what needs to be done in this situation is to create a list of everyone you've ever know and ask them if they if they would be sad if you performed the action. Even if only one of them says yes, then you should reconsider the consequences of your action.

Every other circumstance you find yourself in, no matter how down you are, no matter how shi* you perceive the world to be, no matter how malevolent you think the universe is (it isn't - the universe isn't even aware of your existence) is repairable and with time, effort, dedication and the support of your friends, even if you don't know how much they care about you, things will get better. Just ask Keif'

./empeebee

 

[THECATINTHEHAT]

I fucked up and I'm having to go through withdrawal again.

I'm so tired of this cycle, I'm very lonely. I probably would have killed myself by now if it wasnt for my rabbits.

 

[MagickalKat777]

I fucked up and I'm having to go through withdrawal again.

I'm so tired of this cycle, I'm very lonely. I probably would have killed myself by now if it wasnt for my rabbits.

Hang in there. All of us fall down. Withdrawal sucks but there are so many worse things in life. Withdrawal is temporary and death is permanent.

The world is totally fucked right now, give yourself a pass.

 

[THECATINTHEHAT]

Yeah I just need this cycle to end because it's getting so tiring living it.

The withdrawal is only part of it really, just tired of constant inability to be stable mentally.

I'm doing everything to try and get well by doing therapy and staying clean as much as possible. Psychiatric help is a bit of a lottery though, it's kind of just a suck it and see approach from what I can tell.

I'm probably going to try mirtazapine and see if it helps, that's what has been suggested. It's not an anti-psychotic so I can be grateful of that at least.

 

[empeebee]

Hey @THECATINTHEHAT - feel bad that you're feeling bad. Remember there is a difference between feeling lonely (a trick our minds play on us) and being alone (where you have no-one around you -Tom Hanks Castaway movie kinda thing- or you think that nobody cares for you). What's causing your down?

 

[MagickalKat777]

Yeah I just need this cycle to end because it's getting so tiring living it.

The withdrawal is only part of it really, just tired of constant inability to be stable mentally.

I'm doing everything to try and get well by doing therapy and staying clean as much as possible. Psychiatric help is a bit of a lottery though, it's kind of just a suck it and see approach from what I can tell.

I'm probably going to try mirtazapine and see if it helps, that's what has been suggested. It's not an anti-psychotic so I can be grateful of that at least.

I think the problem with psychiatry is that they view people who think differently as broken and try to fix what they see as a problem when the reality is that very few conditions actually warrant modification with medications (schizophrenia and psychotic episodes for example). I have been on a ton of those damn meds and they’re all pretty fucking awful. I told my therapist once I get off the benzos for good I’m not taking another psych med.

I don’t know specifically what you’re trying to treat but mirtazapine is well known for making people gain a ton of weight. Proper diet, exercise, and CBT are more effective on depressive disorders than any medication too. I am not one to talk since I’m awful about two of those things but the side effects of antidepressants isn’t worth their marginal efficacy over placebo.

Unfortunately there isn’t much I can say about the mental health stuff. I have plenty of down days myself, especially dealing with benzo withdrawal, and if I didn’t have my therapist to let me unload all of it in our sessions once a month I would have lost it. I don’t even know what really keeps me going either. I guess I have just accepted that life is going to suck for the foreseeable future so it doesn’t affect me as much. I am a rapid cycling bipolar and totally unmedicated other than my benzo taper. Things literally change day to day for me so trust me, I know the cycle all too well. This COVID-19 BS isn’t really helping anyone though so give yourself a break.

 

[empeebee]

Hey man, someone I love dearly is on Sertraline so yeah, psychiatrists really are only 'best-guessing' but you can't really blame them. Science and technology are only just scratching the surface of how the mind works.

I don't know where you're at but MagicalKat777 is right by saying "proper diet, exercise, and CBT are more effective on depressive disorders " tho'. Get out your place, take a stroll to the grocery store. Buy some sh*t you don't need, even if just a box of breakfast cereal, and interact with the guy/gal behind the till, even just to say 'hi, how you doin'. Take a stroll to your nearest green space with some left-over bread, tear it up and feed the birds.

Sending you strength and determination.

./empeebee

 

[THECATINTHEHAT]

Thankyou for the kind words.

As for what's causing me to be down? I guess I'm only just starting to work that out but its probably to do with disordered attachments mean I'm constantly looking for acceptance and comfort and to protect myself from emotional wounds but the strategies I developed for doing this were very dysfunctional and now as an adult make it more difficult for those things to come in to my life.

I'm not alone though I'm lucky, i have a friend coming to cuddle me and comfort me in a second.