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Mental Illness Support Thread V. How do you feel?

schizopath

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So I finally got confirmation for why my best friend quit hanging around with me. Hes the type of person to not say things when need to. But anyways, half a year ago I sold one item he bought for me and because my memory is shit and stuff I sold it. I really didnt realize or remember it was his or I never would have sold it. Then few months ago I bought 16-20 concertas for half free from our mutual friend. Well I promised to give him and our other friend some. I gave both 5 and left 6-10 for myself. He thought it had 30 concertas and I cheated him. I also paid for the concertas and gave them away for free. Fuck these misunderstandings. He also still remembers the times I was prescribed benzos and was a horrible junkie. I hope in time we can be friends again. As Im taking steps to normalize life I think its possible.
 
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sewerslide.666mg

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So I finally got confirmation for why my best friend quit hanging around with me. Hes the type of person to not say things when need to. But anyways, half a year ago I sold one item he bought for me and because my memory is shit and stuff I sold it. I really didnt realize or remember it was his or I never would have sold it. Then few months ago I bought 16-20 concertas for half free from our mutual friend. Well I promised to give him and our other friend some. I gave both 5 and left 6-10 for myself. He thought it had 30 concertas and I cheated him. I also paid for the concertas and gave them away for free. Fuck these misunderstandings. He also still remembers the times I was prescribed benzos and was a horrible junkie. I hope in time we can be friends again. As Im taking steps to normalize life I think its possible.
dam,
i feel ya , ive had frends like that,
how long have u been frends?
ive had some frends come and go but the ones ive known for years, even if there not around we will always be frends
 

schizopath

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We were like the Best friends and lived together and stuff. All of his friends he knows through me. He hasnt blocked me do Theres a chance... Need to talk it out and get my shit together. He didnt wanna go Hard on drugs though, and i had ublimited money to spend on drugs back then
 

schizopath

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Sirena Oscura

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I’m not looking forward to work tomorrow.

I’ve been rather anxious today about it and other things, granted now the clonidine has dampened that.

Still... I’m tired. I’m sunburnt. I’m bored with the work. I hate waking up so early.
 

madness00

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I’m not looking forward to work tomorrow.

I’ve been rather anxious today about it and other things, granted now the clonidine has dampened that.

Still... I’m tired. I’m sunburnt. I’m bored with the work. I hate waking up so early.

Work and BL are the two things keeping me connected to the world, otherwise I'd be an antisocial fa-REAK. Wait.. :unsure:

How is work going? You been there long? Is it boring?
 

Sirena Oscura

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Work and BL are the two things keeping me connected to the world, otherwise I'd be an antisocial fa-REAK. Wait.. :unsure:

How is work going? You been there long? Is it boring?

Ive been back from leave for two weeks and I’m very bored. I’ve been stuck at a COVID drive thru testing centre. The people are great, but the work is monotonous and being outdoors in 30+ degree weather is really awful. I want to go back to ward based nursing.
 

schizopath

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Im sorry, I said some stupid shit. But I meant that.

A lot of Australians, surprisingly, want to visit Finland. Idk why.
 

schizopath

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My next suicide attempt will not fail. Fuck my life from the childhood to adulthood. But fuck theres the issue with since I have brothers and shit. Fuck. But nevertheless we ll see how shit turns out. Ive already caused partly 2 deaths.
 

madness00

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My next suicide attempt will not fail. Fuck my life from the childhood to adulthood. But fuck theres the issue with since I have brothers and shit. Fuck. But nevertheless we ll see how shit turns out. Ive already caused partly 2 deaths.

Dude you sell yourself pretty short in regards to being a good person.

You're a great person.

And have a lot of potential to do whatever you want.

Just be you my ninja - we love it.

 

The Axe

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Counting the minutes till I can go to bed, to sleep perchance to dream. Managed to make breakfast for the wife and kids, walk the dog, and do a little yard work. Still, I extremely bored and anxious. What to do what to do. I'd like to get therapy but my HMO is pretty week, plus you have to be 100% clean and sober, which they test for, or you don't get treatment.
 

madness00

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Bored AND anxious?

Sounds uncomfortable.

I had weird dreams today. Someone was following me around, trying to throw up on me. So i took his head and shoved it toward the floor and he fell in his own vomit 🤷‍♂️

I'd rather be anxious than bored.

I hope your family is doing well. Even though IDK you well - no creeperino.
 

schizopath

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Life is life. I need to move forward and stop Chasing women. That brings 60% of my suffering. Get my shit together and use alot fucking less drugs
 

The Axe

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Anxious and panicking again, need to meditate and control my breathing. My head is fucking noisy today, a lot of self blame, panicking that I'm fucking crazy. Can't help no how no way, the answer is always the same. What a fucking fright to be alive and your head is fucking exploding, maybe need some more zyprexa. This is really fucked right now. Ouuuuch, my fucking entire Nero is sysytem is fucking going out of my fucking head. Need to calm downnnnnnnn. I'm know I'm going,g to die but I don't know when or how. Its like I'm, no it is, like I'm trying to figure out how and when I did. Its fucking insane. Think ill take another 10 mg zyprex on top of the ten I took just now.
 
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The Axe

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I'd like to go smoke a malboro going take zyprexa 10mg. My experiment with cannabis failed so I through the rest of my gram out - about 2/3. The problem for me is mental illness and the cannabis is not helping. Going to try to focus of my diagnosis.
 
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