Does Pain Medicine Access Get Removed After a Suicide Attempt?

[starlightchasin]

If I attempt suicide with my oxycodone and it fails—will I lose future access to pain management meds? Will my pain doctor stop treating me? Will there be a public record causing any future pain clinic to refuse to treat me?

No judgments, just honesty.

***Backstory:
I use oxycodone for chronic pain. I have a pain management doctor, and it is a completely legal prescription. It is necessary because I have several severe chronic injuries and chronic illnesses causing pain.

My life is horrible and hopeless and they’re really sick. All my family doesn’t care if they live or die. My boyfriend is abusive. I have no money for treatment. No money for medical treatment for severe illnesses that torment me. I have 100+ diagnosed medical problems. You choose an organ—I’ll tell you what is broken with it. I feel hopeless. I feel like I’m slowly dying. An agonizing death. It would take a miracle to save me. I just want to die faster so it hurts less.

edit to include: my sharp nerve pain is largely controlled by the oxycodone. And most of my whole body pain is controlled by the oxycodone. It’s not 100% gone. But it can’t get any better than this. Because other medicines make me throw up. And higher oxy doses make my head hurt with side effects. So my pain is decently controlled, not gone, but manageable.

So I don’t want to kill myself because of the pain.

But I have 999 other horrible symptoms. So many body systems are in agony. And I legitimately have a horrible bone infection that doctors keep messing up treatment with, and I’m scared it might kill me.

Worst of all is severe fatigue, and neurological problems.

i just want all the suffering to stop.

Let’s say I have about 30 pills of 10mg oxycodone right now. (Plain oxy, no Tylenol mixed in).

I am pretty sure that is a lethal dose.

But I am scared of the fallout, in case it fails.

1) What if, for some reason, it fails. (What if I throw it up. Maybe someone finds me and calls an ambulance and I miraculously live. I actually knows two different people who that happened to, and they survived overdose attempts. So weird stuff happens.)

So let’s say that I survive. And in the hospital after the overdose attempt, I successfully play along as a cooperative patient. I go through all the standard treatments. Hospitalization, inpatient psych ward, then outpatient therapy, etc.

Will my doctor cancel my pain management medications afterwards?

If I get caught using it to overdose?

Will a record of an overdose attempt blacklist me from receiving ANY pain medication from ANY CLINIC in the future?

I’m scared. Because if i fail and survive... and if doctors refuse to give me pain medication for the rest of my life...

It is a fate worse than death.

It will be pure torture. Constant agony.

I don’t want to get myself into a worse situation.

 

[PlowTsc]

ok first off take a deep breathe and relax, reach inside yourself and truly think about what you are feeling at the moment,

I have experienced my mind trying to take me to the dark side and I finally snap out of it and get to a crossroads where I say was it really worth feeling like this, how can I overcome such a ordeal?

It doesn't take overnight, its a process but don't resort to the worst, there is light at the end of the tunnel it just takes time

 

[PlowTsc]

Not only will you lose your meds, you will lose way more if you let the dark side take over you.

 

[BongoBrew]

If I attempt suicide with my oxycodone and it fails—will I lose future access to pain management meds? Will my pain doctor stop treating me? Will there be a public record causing any future pain clinic to refuse to treat me?

No judgments, just honesty.

***Backstory:
I use oxycodone for chronic pain. I have a pain management doctor, and it is a completely legal prescription. It is necessary because I have several severe chronic injuries and chronic illnesses causing pain.

My life is horrible and hopeless and they’re really sick. All my family doesn’t care if they live or die. My boyfriend is abusive. I have no money for treatment. No money for medical treatment for severe illnesses that torment me. I have 100+ diagnosed medical problems. You choose an organ—I’ll tell you what is broken with it. I feel hopeless. I feel like I’m slowly dying. An agonizing death. It would take a miracle to save me. I just want to die faster so it hurts less.

edit to include: my sharp nerve pain is largely controlled by the oxycodone. And most of my whole body pain is controlled by the oxycodone. It’s not 100% gone. But it can’t get any better than this. Because other medicines make me throw up. And higher oxy doses make my head hurt with side effects. So my pain is decently controlled, not gone, but manageable.

So I don’t want to kill myself because of the pain.

But I have 999 other horrible symptoms. So many body systems are in agony. And I legitimately have a horrible bone infection that doctors keep messing up treatment with, and I’m scared it might kill me.

Worst of all is severe fatigue, and neurological problems.

i just want all the suffering to stop.

Let’s say I have about 30 pills of 10mg oxycodone right now. (Plain oxy, no Tylenol mixed in).

I am pretty sure that is a lethal dose.

But I am scared of the fallout, in case it fails.

1) What if, for some reason, it fails. (What if I throw it up. Maybe someone finds me and calls an ambulance and I miraculously live. I actually knows two different people who that happened to, and they survived overdose attempts. So weird stuff happens.)

So let’s say that I survive. And in the hospital after the overdose attempt, I successfully play along as a cooperative patient. I go through all the standard treatments. Hospitalization, inpatient psych ward, then outpatient therapy, etc.

Will my doctor cancel my pain management medications afterwards?

If I get caught using it to overdose?

Will a record of an overdose attempt blacklist me from receiving ANY pain medication from ANY CLINIC in the future?

I’m scared. Because if i fail and survive... and if doctors refuse to give me pain medication for the rest of my life...

It is a fate worse than death.

It will be pure torture. Constant agony.

I don’t want to get myself into a worse situation.

Hell yeah theyre gonna cut you off!! Don't do it. You got a sweet script thats getting you by. Dont fuck that up. If you wanna die go get some fentanyl dope and a handful of Xanax bars. Have you tried communicating any of this to your doctor? Maybe he can up the dose or something?do you have a counsellor or therapist you can talk to? Dont kill yourself..

 

[starlightchasin]

Hell yeah theyre gonna cut you off!! Don't do it. You got a sweet script thats getting you by. Dont fuck that up. If you wanna die go get some fentanyl dope and a handful of Xanax bars. Have you tried communicating any of this to your doctor? Maybe he can up the dose or something?do you have a counsellor or therapist you can talk to? Dont kill yourself..

The pain isn’t the reason I want to kill my self. I have a slow infection and a liver disorder that’s killing me anyway. I’m alone and I don’t have anyone in a strange new city. My own friend/friend group was my boyfriends group and he dumped me for a new girl and then lied about me to everyone I knew that was a mutual friend.
I have a liver disorder and autoimmune disorder that makes me severely sick from mold. My immune system hyper reacts and produces tons of whole body inflammation if exposed to mold.
And guess what? Mold is 95% of everywhere.
So I’m sick EVERYWHERE.
worst of all it causes brain inflammation. Sometimes mold makes me have so much neurological problems, I become like an Alzheimer’s patient. Even on the best days, I can’t think as clearly as I used to. I hate it.

and I would get treatment for the mold poisoning. But the bone infection treatment blocks tbe mold treatment.
And I’ve had 3 doctors malpractice on the home infection. They keep saying it’s irk there. When I can feel the pain and infection feeling (its a very specific malaise) and they take me off antibiotics saying it’s fine. Then I relapse until I’m so sick I can’t get out of bed. Then someone believes me again, and the cycle starts again...

I’ve had 2 surgeries to debride the infection, that both failed. The next will cost $10,000 that i don’t have.
If I could even do it. I’m so weak and malnourished from the antibiotics destroying my digestion. No doctor wants to operate on me with a 10 foot pole. And I’m allergic to a lot of the IV’s they want to use to treat me.
I’m too sick to work, but disability keeps getting denied because I’m young and my illnesses are not well-known.
And I’m failing college classes because I’m too sick and depressed to keep up. I keep getting panic attacks when I try to do my homework. And why bother—the infection might kill me anyway.

I don’t see a way out of this . Unless it’s a miracle from God or death.

 

[starlightchasin]

Hell yeah theyre gonna cut you off!! Don't do it. You got a sweet script thats getting you by. Dont fuck that up. If you wanna die go get some fentanyl dope and a handful of Xanax bars. Have you tried communicating any of this to your doctor? Maybe he can up the dose or something?do you have a counsellor or therapist you can talk to? Dont kill yourself..

But yeah. It is a sweet script. I hate to risk it.
but I’m so exhausted and dying slowly. I’m tired.

 

[starlightchasin]

Not only will you lose your meds, you will lose way more if you let the dark side take over you.

The pain isn’t the reason I want to kill my self. I have a slow infection that’s killing me anyway. I’m alone and I don’t have anyone in a strange new city. My own friend/friend group was my boyfriends group and he dumped me for a new girl and then lied about me to everyone I knew that was a mutual friend.
I have a liver disorder and autoimmune disorder that makes me severely sick from mold. My immune system hyper reacts and produces tons of whole body inflammation if exposed to mold.
And guess what? Mold is 95% of everywhere.
So I’m sick EVERYWHERE.
worst of all it causes brain inflammation. Sometimes mold makes me have so much neurological problems, I become like an Alzheimer’s patient. Even on the best days, I can’t think as clearly as I used to. I hate it.

and I would get treatment for the mold poisoning. But the bone infection treatment blocks tbe mold treatment.
And I’ve had 3 doctors malpractice on the home infection. They keep saying it’s irk there. When I can feel the pain and infection feeling (its a very specific malaise) and they take me off antibiotics saying it’s fine. Then I relapse until I’m so sick I can’t get out of bed. Then someone believes me again, and the cycle starts again...

I’ve had 2 surgeries to debride the infection, that both failed. The next will cost $10,000 that i don’t have.
If I could even do it. I’m so weak and malnourished from the antibiotics destroying my digestion. No doctor wants to operate on me with a 10 foot pole. And I’m allergic to a lot of the IV’s they want to use to treat me.
I’m too sick to work, but disability keeps getting denied because I’m young and my illnesses are not well-known.
And I’m failing college classes because I’m too sick and depressed to keep up. I keep getting panic attacks when I try to do my homework. And why bother—the infection might kill me anyway.

I don’t see a way out of this . Unless it’s a miracle from God or death.

 

[PlowTsc]

Believe in the miracle, if you need help with your classes, you can message me and I can help you with that. What I learned here is that I found my other family and family helps each other.

 

[starlightchasin]

ok first off take a deep breathe and relax, reach inside yourself and truly think about what you are feeling at the moment,

I have experienced my mind trying to take me to the dark side and I finally snap out of it and get to a crossroads where I say was it really worth feeling like this, how can I overcome such a ordeal?

It doesn't take overnight, its a process but don't resort to the worst, there is light at the end of the tunnel it just takes time

The pain isn’t the reason I want to kill my self. I have a slow infection that’s killing me anyway. I’m alone and I don’t have anyone in a strange new city. My own friend/friend group was my boyfriends group and he dumped me for a new girl and then lied about me to everyone I knew that was a mutual friend.
I have a liver disorder and autoimmune disorder that makes me severely sick from mold. My immune system hyper reacts and produces tons of whole body inflammation if exposed to mold.
And guess what? Mold is 95% of everywhere.
So I’m sick EVERYWHERE.
worst of all it causes brain inflammation. Sometimes mold makes me have so much neurological problems, I become like an Alzheimer’s patient. Even on the best days, I can’t think as clearly as I used to. I hate it.

and I would get treatment for the mold poisoning. But the bone infection treatment blocks tbe mold treatment.
And I’ve had 3 doctors malpractice on the home infection. They keep saying it’s irk there. When I can feel the pain and infection feeling (its a very specific malaise) and they take me off antibiotics saying it’s fine. Then I relapse until I’m so sick I can’t get out of bed. Then someone believes me again, and the cycle starts again...

I’ve had 2 surgeries to debride the infection, that both failed. The next will cost $10,000 that i don’t have.
If I could even do it. I’m so weak and malnourished from the antibiotics destroying my digestion. No doctor wants to operate on me with a 10 foot pole. And I’m allergic to a lot of the IV’s they want to use to treat me.
I’m too sick to work, but disability keeps getting denied because I’m young and my illnesses are not well-known.
And I’m failing college classes because I’m too sick and depressed to keep up. I keep getting panic attacks when I try to do my homework. And why bother—the infection might kill me anyway.

I don’t see a way out of this . Unless it’s a miracle from God or death.

 

[BongoBrew]

Fuck it dude youll be fine. Dont worry about the debt, you have plenty of time to pay that off. I mean if your literally dying I'd say have as much fun as possible. Smoke some weed and get some speed too... Try and relax and not worry so much. Or get you a cat or dog or something. Even if your vessel through this life is causing you pain, that doesnt mean you can't still enjoy the ride. Embrace that shit. Are you spiritual? Hows your diet? Do you excersize? On any antidepressants... Sorry for all tge questions just trying to get a better understanding of your situation.

 

[BongoBrew]

Do you use marijuana for any of the nausea or inflamation your experiencing?

 

[Jabberwocky]

If I attempt suicide with my oxycodone and it fails—will I lose future access to pain management meds? Will my pain doctor stop treating me? Will there be a public record causing any future pain clinic to refuse to treat me?

No judgments, just honesty.

***Backstory:
I use oxycodone for chronic pain. I have a pain management doctor, and it is a completely legal prescription. It is necessary because I have several severe chronic injuries and chronic illnesses causing pain.

My life is horrible and hopeless and they’re really sick. All my family doesn’t care if they live or die. My boyfriend is abusive. I have no money for treatment. No money for medical treatment for severe illnesses that torment me. I have 100+ diagnosed medical problems. You choose an organ—I’ll tell you what is broken with it. I feel hopeless. I feel like I’m slowly dying. An agonizing death. It would take a miracle to save me. I just want to die faster so it hurts less.

edit to include: my sharp nerve pain is largely controlled by the oxycodone. And most of my whole body pain is controlled by the oxycodone. It’s not 100% gone. But it can’t get any better than this. Because other medicines make me throw up. And higher oxy doses make my head hurt with side effects. So my pain is decently controlled, not gone, but manageable.

So I don’t want to kill myself because of the pain.

But I have 999 other horrible symptoms. So many body systems are in agony. And I legitimately have a horrible bone infection that doctors keep messing up treatment with, and I’m scared it might kill me.

Worst of all is severe fatigue, and neurological problems.

i just want all the suffering to stop.

Let’s say I have about 30 pills of 10mg oxycodone right now. (Plain oxy, no Tylenol mixed in).

I am pretty sure that is a lethal dose.

But I am scared of the fallout, in case it fails.

1) What if, for some reason, it fails. (What if I throw it up. Maybe someone finds me and calls an ambulance and I miraculously live. I actually knows two different people who that happened to, and they survived overdose attempts. So weird stuff happens.)

So let’s say that I survive. And in the hospital after the overdose attempt, I successfully play along as a cooperative patient. I go through all the standard treatments. Hospitalization, inpatient psych ward, then outpatient therapy, etc.

Will my doctor cancel my pain management medications afterwards?

If I get caught using it to overdose?

Will a record of an overdose attempt blacklist me from receiving ANY pain medication from ANY CLINIC in the future?

I’m scared. Because if i fail and survive... and if doctors refuse to give me pain medication for the rest of my life...

It is a fate worse than death.

It will be pure torture. Constant agony.

I don’t want to get myself into a worse situation.

Yes. Firstly If you attempt suicide you will not only be flagged but institutionalized until a Doctor “deems” you fit. That being said I don’t see you’ve had a good experience with them so why put yourself in your hands if you fail. Secondly let’s hope you respond, you should definitely wait on this idea for Atleast three days. I can’t tell you not to wanna die, I think it’s natural and some of us are suffering more then others but take it from me, your pain will just be transferred onto everyone who loves and cares for you even Bluelight. I’m wondering if your oxycodone isn’t causing some suicidal ideation. Opiates have a powerful effect on our moods. I can see you’ve got quite a lot to deal with and it would be selfish for me to say for you to just deal with it if that’s truly not your wish but you should think about this seriously long and hard you’ve spent this long on earth what’s an extra week. Take things week by week or day by day or second by second if you have to. I think to be honest, you should look into ego death and having a psychedelic experience I know this doesn’t answer the question and is stupid advice but maybe an ego death is what you need. Please do not take my advice but on taking psychedelics and only observe it because I’m a disabled SoundCloud rapper not a licensed anything. But it might be something that would be of interest and perhaps you can see what it’s like to be dead and separated without having to do it. Again don’t take my advice about this just observe it. But I do think you should wait on this idea if only for a little longer and talk to us. Our dms are always open each and everyone one of us even if it’s just to shoot the shit please dm me I don’t wanna talk about everything if that’s not something you’re comfortable with.

 

[TheInvisibleStoner]

Smoke some weed and get some speed too...

This is really not good advice for this person.

Probably the last thing they want to do is put either of these into them.

I have no advice aside to not kill yourself. You wont do it anyway with those. You would fail and be taken away into a ward and probably given nothing.

You have to obviously stay away from mold. I have issues with mold where my nose can run like a faucet, and there is certainly mold everywhere. Just stepping into a room I will know since the sniffles comes immediately. To being in the room forever and running like a faucet. Getting better, but from destroying my nostrils with sniffing anti histamines. Turned my nose reverse. So have learned to avoid it.

You should be taking immune boosting supplements and food to extreme levels as well in the meantime.

 

[hydroazuanacaine]

taking those pills will almost certainly result in a failed suicide attempt.

sorry to hear you are in such anguish.

 

[Jabberwocky]

taking those pills will almost certainly result in a failed suicide attempt.

sorry to hear you are in such anguish.

I’m kinda confused by this though,

But yeah. It is a sweet script. I hate to risk it.
but I’m so exhausted and dying slowly. I’m tired.

The fact you’re still worried about the script gives me hope with this. We all are dying slowly by I sympathize with what’s happened to you. I’ve been psychologically fucked by doctors and they get away with it cause of a failed diagnosis behind a practice that has no medical basis. But that’s another story. Doctors aren’t perfect. But they aren’t there necessarily to fix the problem either. Modern medicine isn’t designed for a prevention it’s designed for a cure.

 

[✿Dai₷y✿]

I've heard of this mould in some medical shows. and it takes months and months to treat with horrible antifungals, youll also have to sit in the sun as much as possible, get as much information from all sources you can find d as doesn't iv light beds help?


Dont do suicide with your pills, it will end your s ript and I suggest seeing someone about your feelings that you would just end it.

There are other ways that can be researched but you do that, its better ro get help coping whith what you have and havi ng a possible good out come