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Drugs and Family

Bomboclat

Bomboclat

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Oct 25, 2008
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ITT: talk about family in relation to drugs.

How did your parents deal with your drug use?

How would you deal with your kids drug use?

How do you feel about parents who use when they have kids at home?

For those who arent a parent yet but someday will be:
How has using drugs swayed your judgement as to how you would view your childs use if they were to start using? Or has your use swayed your judgement at all?

How would/do you feel about younger siblings drug use?

Did your older siblings influence your decision to begin using drugs?

Do you discuss drugs, prohibition, etc with your family?

Also, feel free to just say what's on your mind when it comes to family and drug use.
 
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I myself am not a parent, but who knows, maybe one day I will be (I dont really want to though, im not a fan of kids much, but that's an entirely different story)

If I were to be a parent and I were to find my kids using I dont think I would have such a huge deal with it as modern day parents would, as long as it was somewhat under control.

Not saying I would advocate the usage, as I never do, but if my child were old enough to understand what he/she was doing and seemed to have control over it (i.e. they werent spiraling downward) I dont think I would react as parents these days would.
 
i think with this generation coming up, i wouldnt be surprised to see more parents doing drugs with there kids then anything.

if i were a parent though and i caught my child, id sit it down and ask what all it has been using, ask why, and go from there. no way would i go ape shit, it only makes them want it more.
 
definetly my parents resentment to any kind of drugs except alcohol has changed my mentality toward how i'd act toward my kids. i wouldn't freak out over weed, and would prefer they smoke mostly in the house. i would set conditions for good grades and shit. i'd understand they'd want to experiment with other shit like mdma, opiates, w/e and if they do i'd tell them the dangers of it and how it's important not to abuse the shit. i'd just want them to be completely honest with me, not have them running around behind my back tellling me lies.

my parents chose to restrict every drug including weed like it was heroin (except alcohol :!), so if i want to do anything i have to do it behind their back

i know they're scared of me becoming an addict and by doing so they're killing a lot of bond and connection between us

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Now playing: Ice Cube - Once Upon A Time In The Projects
via FoxyTunes
 
My parents were (and are) weed smokers. I ended up an opiate addict. do the math, i guess.... they did not approve of any of my drug use but it is a long story with lots of factors.

i don't talk to my dad at all anymore. I do talk to my mom. They're potheads both of them, but lead otherwise successful lives , aka gainfully employed etc.
 
After trying most of the big, bad drugs at this point I would sway my kids from usage. I'd be honest with them and tell them that I thought it was all fun and games at one point too and then bam, you start to see that dark side they warn you about creeping up (and this goes for all drugs including weed). I would not freak out at them if I caught them or anything I would ask them why they felt the need to use and would try to get them to take interest in other activities as I know that drug usage really doesn't do much besides open your mind with those first couple uses.
 
Ya know, I haven't really though about how to appraoch this when the time comes. I would *hope* to be like Swift Serenity, but I guess you never truly know until the time comes.

I myself dappled heavily into coke, and e, and after a 5 year break, now adderall. I can only hope and pray that my child (ren) inherit their father's gene to not give in to peer pressure and resist, but I know that that probably is unlikely. Hopefully when the time comes, I too can say been there, done that and trust me .... it's not worth it. IDK what to say to prevent them from going down that tempting path ... but hopefully it will be enough.
 
My parents know all about my drug use, but can't do shit about it. And I'd never have kids... drugs or no drugs, so dealing with my own kid's drug use wouldn't be an issue for me. I know a few people who are drug addicts and have kids living under the same roof. It's not exactly a good situation for the kid to be in, but I'm not gonna start telling people how to raise their kids.
 
I think it depends on the drugs and the rest of the parenting situation. As a child, I didn't get any specific guidance whatsoever from my parental figures in re any drugs, even alcohol, and I went through my various phases and some things stayed with me and others didn't. I think moderation in alcohol consumption practiced openly was the unspoken theme, but ultimately the message was, please kid, don't get yourself in trouble, and even more importantly, don't get me in trouble. Worked pretty well, although of course I'm not sure how much they knew.

using that as a guideline as a parent, it's of primary importance to me to regulate my behavior to prevent any blackmail-type situations from a child who temporarily loses his good sense about things. but this goes past just drug use. what they don't know about me could only hurt me. i think that could result in the dont-ask-dont-tell-dont-get-caught philosophy I grew up with, but then again, like i said it worked out pretty well for me.
 
my parents were open with me about their own (and the rest of my family's) drug use. when they discovered that i was using anything, they educated me on moderation. they try to keep involved in what's going on with me to make sure there's no underlying reason other than experimentation/having a good time occasionally to any of my use. then again, they don't know about my current opiate addiction or it's severity.

when i have kids though, i plan to educate them on different substances and explain to them the effects as well as repercussions. i want my kids to be open with me as i feel it's better to know what's going on and have any experimenting be under my own roof/watch. i'd want to know what the reasons behind their use would be to make sure it's not from some deep seeded issues that need to be addressed and handled in other ways. i'm also going to be honest in talking about my addictions and how they affected my life as well.

i also view my addiction to opiates as being life-long; meaning i'll be using after i have children (though never during carrying, of course). i have enough discipline to keep myself under control and limit my intake to a level where i am a fully functional individual of society. other than the people i choose to inform about my use, no one even suspects. opiates are part of my daily life not necessarily to get high (though it sure is nice when i do catch a nice body buzz), but more to maintain and to feel normal.

i definitely think that views on drug use have evolved drastically from previous generations and that it's more widely acknowledged, accepted, and discussed among parents and children. this has both positive and negative aspects though, like everything else!
 
My father said I was a drug addict.
And convinced my mother I was to.
They pretty much sent me into this depressive downward spiral...

I could only really get ahold of myself a few months after I got out of the house and cut ties completely with them......

I would be okay with my kids using some drugs responsibly. It would be really complicated but I would want them to know they can be completely honest with me.
 
I have asthma so when they found out I was smoking weed and almost exclusively hanging out with people who smoke cigarettes they took it pretty hard.
They never really relented in their comments and conversations to quit, but they always gave me space to do what I wanted.
They were in total denial when it came to opiates.
Once they couldn't ignore the fact I was stealing my father's prescription any longer they confronted me and sent me to rehab. After which I was clean for a good 8-9 months before relapsing.
I think denial and passive worry could characterize the vast majority of their interaction with my drug problems.

When I have kids I am going to be much more proactive. Telling them what I went through, and exactly why they need to avoid doing what I did. I am not ever going to give my kids the benefit of the doubt if I suspect them of using hard drugs because I know too well how addiction can strike anyone, no matter how intelligent or talented. I am not going to be a total hard-ass on them, but I am going to do whatever I can to get through to them short of kicking them onto the street. I will never kick them out because I know that only makes the situation worse.
Assuming they don't have asthma I am going to be totally accepting of them smoking weed, but I am not going to let it get in the way of school, or abused as a boredom replacement. In fact I would prefer they smoke weed to binge drink. I won't actively smoke with them until they are well into their 20's however. I think it would be utterly irresponsible for me to introduce drugs to my kids when they are still in their teens.

Basically my parents were in denial and passive, and didn't tell me about their own experiences with drugs until after I got into trouble myself. I am going to be proactive and assertive explaining the healthy relationship one can have with mind altering substances, it's not just a matter of what's illegal or not. It's a matter of why you're using, who you're with, etc.
 
My parents know about my drug use, and while they seriously enabled me for the first couple years of my use, they still were worried about me a lot and wanted me to quit, but they couldn't really do anything about it. When they thought I was getting too out of hand they pulled me out of school and put me in oupatient rehab, and then when they found out I was still using they put me in an inpatient rehab. They don't want me living with them anymore, because they don't completely trust me, but they are helping me pay to live in a sober living home.

As far as parents using with kids in the house I don't think it's that big of a deal if you can be responsible and use in moderation.
For those who arent a parent yet but someday will be:

If I had a child and found out they were using I wouldn't get upset at them, but I would make sure they are informed about what all they're putting in their body. My use and experience with my parents has certainly swayed my judgement about how these types of situations should be handled
 
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My mother's sister committed suicide at age 21 I think back in the 70s and blamed it on an acid flashback in her note. Thus my mother absolutely abhors any and all usage of drugs by me, and regularly lets me know how sad she is that I do any drugs at all. If/when I have kids I think I will encourage them to be completely open about their habits with me and I will operate from a harm reduction standpoint unless their drug use starts to negatively affect their grades, mental health, etc. That said, I will not discuss my own use with them unless it is relevant to a particular incident.
 
My parents, especially my dad, hates any kind of drug usage, as well as alcohol. They basically went apeshit on me. Honestly, my relationship with my mom was good, and my dad was....eh. Now my relationship with my mom is bad and I can't stand my dad (well I could never stand him..but still.) They never gave me a chance to do anything responsibly, they just assumed I was using drugs because I couldn't cope with problems like a normal kid (wtf?).

Anyway, when I do become a parent, I would definitely let my kid know about my drug use. I'd encourage my kid to not do drugs or drink, but of course they'll want to. As long as my kid is responsible and let's me know what's going on with his use. If my kid would be completely honest with me, then I think it would work out.

IMHO: If you want to have an honest relationship with your kids when they're doing drugs....start that honest-relationship part early on in life. Don't wait till they're teenagers and are out of control to ask to be all honest 'n shit.
 
I'd teach my kids about pharmacology and teach them how to use drugs properly; and how to conceal them from law enforcement.

I mean, my dad's usually asking me for shrooms and shit.
 
I'd ring a drug councelling service or something to have someone to talk to abo0ut it.
 
I don't know, this makes me wonder how my parents feel about me ;(

(no i don't prostitute myself, but i've made the foolish decision to steal from my mother from drugs once to many times in the past)
 
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