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300mg Ketamine K-Hole from the Darkest Depths of the Void

LH_Oswald

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I'm on the heavy side, I weigh 225 pounds. So I had read somewhere that a proper K-Hole dose is approximately 1mg/pound.

Well after a couple weeks of messing around with this stuff and not quite getting into a full blown k-hole I decided enough is enough. The time has come to face it. Up to this point I had several very interesting dark warpy dreamy experiences just kicking back on my bed after snorting a small line like 100mg or so. Soon I would find that a true k-hole is nothing like those sub-hole level doses and trips.

So I'm a relatively chill guy. I'm almost 40 years old and I have tripped on LSD probably 200 times over the years. I love LSD tripping. I've also loved a lot of hard candy over the years and had many serious health problems. Probably the most troublesome drug in my past was MDPV. The places that drug took me are beyond the pale. I've seen it all, I've been it all, everything from high society to the lowest of lows even in prison for a few years once. Anyway, I've been around, seen a lot, but still I consider myself chill.

So ketamine was a drug i was never able to get ahold of over the years. In the states it's not easy to come by. So I procured a gram over the dark web to see what all the hype is about.

My first experiences with low doses under 100mg were kind of boring, like a drunk feeling, then I started increasing the doses a bit and was getting caught up in very strange dimensions of thought and space. Dark and warm I would say. The sub-hole doses were very interesting. They seemed to allow me to fly away from my body and mind and go on a roller-coaster ride into strange organic mental landscapes that were driven by the winds of my detaching thoughts and ideas. But even during these more intermediate trips I could snap out of them if I wanted. I would feel drunk and unsteady and the room would be very distorted but I was still intact mentally.

So here we are earlier this evening, I decided this was going to be it, and so it was. The k hole experience. I weighed out a dose of 300mg. The powder came from rocks of crystal ketamine that I crushed into a rather daunting looking line. I snorted the whole damn thing and let loose the kraken.

Right away I am feeling this intense come up. There's like this crackling tingling fuzziness starting. I'm a bit nervous but I think if I've been able to handle DMT, LSD, and Salvia, I should be fine... 3 minutes in and everything is starting to look like there is a layer of static on it, or as if there's motion blur and a bit of tearing. Also at this point, due to the extreme body load I am feeling I have become a bit afraid, and I am a little worried about whats coming. Still I am soldiering on through this, there is no going back.

I believe I may have been a bit tense at this point, right around 5 minutes in, when I started hearing an extremely loud ringing in my ears like a jet engine as my visual center was becoming more and more shredded and everything was ripping and tearing and spinning, sliding, like broken mirrors. At 6 minutes the drip was in full effect, I was swallowing back a bitter, but not unpleasant, chemical taste, all the while the whole experience was intensifying violently, this was not like the other trips at all. This one grabbed me by the shoulders and was swinging me around the room and yelling obscenities.

At 7 minutes in the room and my mind was becoming terribly violent and I knew I was heading towards a situation where I was going up against a drug who wanted to take away my grip on reality. At 8 minutes in the room is shredding and geometrically fractalizing out in all directions. I have a sense that my body and everything in my vision is speeding up and folding into these dark tendrils that look like the walls of an H.R. Geiger painting. At this point, maybe 10 minutes in, I realize I've gone to far and this is going to hurt, I don't like this and I want this over, only I know it wont be over any time soon.

Now the fight begins of me trying desperately to hold on to control but losing it bit by bit. One of the last sensations I had of my body was when I sat to try to get up and the sounds that made sounded like a rattlesnake and it sent a shiver up my spine. Dark undertones were becoming more and more overt. Fear was upon me. I imagined myself running through the streets naked like some PCP-dusted maniac, getting tazed, that might be my fate. I fought my hardest against the hole that was taking me away but I saw that it was futile. I was traumatized by the feeling of my body being violently ripped apart and my limbs were laying hundreds of feet apart but still I could feel them and use them. I no longer know how much time had passed. Here a deep soul-crushing panic sets in and all the happiness is gone from the ride. I'm sure I will be running through the halls of a psyche ward by the time this is over.

Filled with dread and fear, and now rapidly losing my bearings on the physical ordered dimension I was once a part of, my core began destabilizing. I laid back down into what felt and sounded like a spider-webbed abyss and fell down down down to a place where there was no longer 3 dimensions, there was no longer gravity. I was seeing explosions of geometric patterns that were also wet, dark, purply-black, globular and fractal in nature and were assuming bizarre forms all around me. At this point I could no longer understand anything. I could not understand language at all. I was hearing the distant sounds of talking on the TV but now the words had lost all meaning. I was awash in a dark void that was going to have its way with me.

I thought my 60x Salvia trip was never going to be topped, but here it was being topped. And now my thoughts were becoming unrecognizable and detached like smeared versions of themselves that I could not decipher as hard as I tried. Even emotions became detached and were requiring more and more concentration to understand. The last intact idea I had was that I had exposed my finite body to the infinite and there was no coming back from this state. Space and time ended here. I was brain damaged, and possibly dead. I felt there was a presence there with me that was communicating to me through perception, there was no language and no emotion, only strange grainy perceptions and they were very dark. I was being interrogated and mentally raped. I was overcome by a surge of dreadful emotions as I kept falling deeper in to what looked like carnivorous plants that were devouring me over and over again in what seemed like a multitude of converging dimensions. I would have flashes of other peoples faces and felt fleeting familiarity with them but it was like I was looking at an alien species. What little thought I had left was appearing visually and fragmenting and I could only chase one of the bits the fragmented away, but the bits did not contain the whole so I felt all was lost. I gave in and surrendered. By now even my memories were taken from me and i was no longer myself. I had lost myself in this dark, evil, nebula and now I was just raw oscillating energy. I realized this was the source of all time and matter, the lattice of all the universes that ever were. My physical body was completely gone, memories were all gone, everything was abstract and dark and I merged with the void. I was at the place where only energy and potential exist.

Gradually coming back from the void into my physical senses was no more comfortable than having them stripped from me. I began the reverse journey into some semblance of consciousness and physics. Gravity returned and I felt the familiarity of 3-dimensional movement again. Eventually I realized that I was coming back to the light and I felt an extreme surge of relief that I was being given a second chance in this universe.

I have recovered now, approximately 4 hours since the experience began and I feel only slightly numb. I wish there was something meaningful I could have brought back. I guess I would say even an experienced psychonaut might meet his match in the K Hole.

Edit: after some additional reflection I have some more in site as to why I had such a bad reaction to the k hole. I have some trauma in my background. PTSD diagnosed. I also Borderline personality disorder diagnosed. I believe that these underlying conditions caused my rejection of the k hole. I have a deep seated fear of abandonment, and I believe I was afraid that I was being abandoned, by myself, in those moments, which caused a visceral panic reaction to a psychadelic experience of that magnitude.

I do plan to continue with the sub-hole / borderline dose trips.
 
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PYTH

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Good times.

The one anxiety I used to get while holing and still do, sometimes, is that I'm doing something I'm unaware of like wandering or taking calls or texting... or manipulating reality with my mind :alien:... but mobility is hard for me on K, which is one of its virtues. I'll occasionally stumble from A to B if I have to puke or think I hear an alarming noise before the hole fully sets in but at worse I end up crumpled / balled on the floor nearby or, in a few cases, clinging desperately upright to a door frame or piece of furniture as the hole overtakes me.
 

dopamimetic

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Nice report indeed. As somebody who never ever reached a hole, only plenty of this rollercoaster stuff and, strangely, a few times anesthesia. Never with K though, tolerance was already high when I did K the first time.

Thought all the dissos had a hole but K maybe the only which physically incapacites, making it safer to reach and same for anesthesia - once I almost trashed a room, so @PYTH I share your concerns..

For sure feels sometimes like dissoverse was a temporary universe bubble where a mind knowledged and powerful enough might manipulate either reality or somehow mess with multiverses, possibly the same - if every change creates a new one. Now maybe some firewall notices you lacking permission for that, so 'fixing up' things -> merge the new and old one, causing some disturbances which get 'written' in the matrix as random rage or similar. Or making you end up in a padded room so Nowbody Will Ever Believe™.

And imagine taking a full mania inducing PCP at supra-recreational doses before surgery (they used it medicinally before K was developed). Good luck fixating the poor patient.. But anesthesia with MXE is nothing special at all. You just wake up some hours later and a little hungover, wondering where the hours have gone to but neither I nor a friend had moved, nor was there any hole. Same with another one sold as 2F-DCK but probably was sth else. This had a hole but not for me.

But most of all, never imagined that entering the hole is auch a violent process given how euphoric and, at least once you got used to the weirdness, devoid of anxiety dissociatives are.

Thanks for sharing!
 
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Shady's Fox

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Nice report indeed. As somebody who never ever reached a hole, only plenty of this rollercoaster stuff and, strangely, a few times anesthesia. Never with K though, tolerance was already high when I did K the first time.

Thought all the dissos had a hole but K maybe the only which physically incapacites, making it safer to reach and same for anesthesia - once I almost trashed a room and imagine taking a full mania inducing PCP at supra-recreational doses before surgery (they used it medicinally before K was developed). Good luck fixating the poor patient.. But anesthesia with MXE is nothing special at all. You just wake up some hours later and a little hungover, wondering where the hours have gone to but neither I nor a friend had moved. Same with another one sold as 2F-DCK but probably was sth else.

But most of all, never imagined that entering the hole is auch a violent process given how euphoric and, at least once you got used to the weirdness, devoid of anxiety dissociatives are.

Thanks for sharing!
K-Hole it's beautiful, you find peace.
 

Flower Fairy

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Are you even sure that was K and not some RC because that doesn't sound like clean K to me, and I love my K lol, it's normally in crystals/shards anyway, so yours could of been K mixed up with an RC like 3-MeO-PCP or 3-ho-pcp or any of the other ketamine analogues mixed together and made into rock from, or even just an RC
 

dopamimetic

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K-Hole it's beautiful, you find peace.
The pre-hole, this either floating or hovering, sometimes rollercoaster like is pure zen like peace, yes. 10x better than any opioid if you ask me. But it's not losing contact with reality, it's a dream and i can forget about my body but it remains there, usually some little knowledge about my body remains or at least my human identity and I could open my eyes any time and even get up and interact with something.

Edit: Oh, second thought, it's possible I guess when you're fighting the complete dissociation as the OP describes. I vaguely remember panicking on an early DXM trip because I was ill informed and thought of respiratory depression when I stopped feeling my body. Now that I know it'll breathe by itself as needed on disso, it becomes peaceful not to feel any physical contact any more.. Lying down and close the eyes in a dark room or with psychedelic lighting is the best sett imo, soft music as random noise from TV can be very disturbing.
 
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LH_Oswald

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I got it from a reputable vendor with high reviews, many hundreds of positive good reviews. So I do believe it was genuine K. It functioned exactly as it should right up until I went in to the abyss. I really liked the sub-hole trips. They are super warm and peaceful journey into the mind. The hole is too much for me. Too alien. Personally I need an anchor. I have trauma in my background. PTSD diagnosed. Also Borderline personality disorder diagnosed. After some additional reflection, I believe that these underlying conditions caused my rejection of being overtaken. I have a deep seated fear of abandonment, and I believe I was afraid that I was being abandoned, by myself, in those moments, which caused a visceral panic which interacted poorly with a psychadelic experience of that magnitude.

I do plan to continue with the sub-hole / borderline dose trips.
 

dopamimetic

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@LH_Oswald Interesting. I have very similar conditions, and fell in addicted love with dissociatives by the very first contact now 15 years ago. The relief this zen mode comes with is imdescribable. Oh, borderline personality has officially been attributed to nmda receptors!

May I ask whether you too suffer from a constantly heightened inner tension, oversensibility to stress and anxiety? How do you react to very low doses of K, such that are barely noticeable? 🙂

Same reason why I have been afraid of serotonergic psychedelics for many years since a maybe not too unsimilar dreadful experience with 🍄 cubensis, which happened to be much stronger than expected. No ego dissolution and think I couldn't let go which caused some kind of fear of death.
 

nznity

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Are you even sure that was K and not some RC because that doesn't sound like clean K to me, and I love my K lol, it's normally in crystals/shards anyway, so yours could of been K mixed up with an RC like 3-MeO-PCP or 3-ho-pcp or any of the other ketamine analogues mixed together and made into rock from, or even just an RC
The effect u get from k Is dose dependant,he's going for massive doses. That's y i dont fk with k that much.
 

PYTH

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I mean, I guess it could be another weird disso but it basically sounds like a heavy ketamine hole to me, and I've had many, just one where the heaviness of the experience caught the OP off-guard and OP's mind desperate fought it, making for an unpleasant trip.

Nearly 300mg on functionally little-no tolerance, especially for someone who's never experienced a deep ketamine hole before, would be one hell of a punch.

The pleasant peaceful floaty CEV trips are sort of the 'plateau' before the reality annihilation 'plateau', I suppose. They tend to be acerbated by opening one's eyes.

edit: it's the kind of thing that's really hard to describe if you haven't been there. When I reach that stage my internal monologue isn't 'wheee, how cool, trippy' it's going 'ok brain, buckle the fuck up'. It's kind of like getting on a no-joke rollercoaster - it's fun because it's terrifying, and if you know what to expect and that you're essentially safe it can be pleasurable despite the fear. And once the ride starts there's no way off 'til it's over.
 
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LH_Oswald

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@LH_Oswald May I ask whether you too suffer from a constantly heightened inner tension, oversensibility to stress and anxiety? How do you react to very low doses of K, such that are barely noticeable? 🙂
Yeah I'm like that. I have learned to live with it, and other neuroses. It is not such a part of my every day life anymore. I'm not normal, my whole life is a bizarre acid trip. I'm just along for the ride.

I really liked the low level dosing of ketamine and I intend to keep experimenting there. I did find a very peaceful feeling there, far away from the typical buzzing of my fears and anxieties.
 

Flower Fairy

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The effect u get from k Is dose dependant,he's going for massive doses. That's y i dont fk with k that much
Fucksake its a fucking lines worth don't you start, it's a massive dose for an RC even mental psychotic type dose for a certain pcp analogues,people need to stop saying 300mg is a high dose as its pissing me off, yes it's high for people with not much experience with K in which case why even answear his question lol

Who knows more about K? People who take it often, this wasn't K thats why fucked him up, buying off the dark web not testing it, and he snorted it didn't he? You lot are making me feel like a fucking K junky when so many people do so much more K and drugs that I couldnt do, sorry if I've gone off on one I'm fucking ill and wake up to this
 

Atelier3

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This is a really helpful and interesting review. Thanks for taking the time to write it up. I’ve been thinking about trying ketamine but am scared of getting caught in just the kind of experience you describe. I’ve always had a bit of a problem with LSD where my mind works too hard to keep a grip on reality leading to bad trips. The few times I’ve been able to just let go my trips have been life alteringingly wonderful but more often its like I’m on a train leaving the station but trying as hard as I can to keep one foot on the platform and getting pulled apart. On the other hand the intensity you describe at the beginning sounds about the level of mainlining coke which I love (maybe because it only lasts a few minutes before he return to sanity)
 

Flower Fairy

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This is a really helpful and interesting review. Thanks for taking the time to write it up. I’ve been thinking about trying ketamine but am scared of getting caught in just the kind of experience you describe
Test the K mate, start on 50mg, wait 30-45 minutes see how you feel, you should start small and if you feel it, maybe enjoy that feeling and then try a little more, don't be scared just don't enjoy it to much and end up like me, K addiction is no joke
 

nznity

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This is a really helpful and interesting review. Thanks for taking the time to write it up. I’ve been thinking about trying ketamine but am scared of getting caught in just the kind of experience you describe. I’ve always had a bit of a problem with LSD where my mind works too hard to keep a grip on reality leading to bad trips. The few times I’ve been able to just let go my trips have been life alteringingly wonderful but more often its like I’m on a train leaving the station but trying as hard as I can to keep one foot on the platform and getting pulled apart. On the other hand the intensity you describe at the beginning sounds about the level of mainlining coke which I love (maybe because it only lasts a few minutes before he return to sanity)
From experience I've noticed that only like 1 in 5 Ppl that try K like it but those who try it FUCKIN LOVE IT.
 

Flower Fairy

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From experience I've noticed that only like 1 in 5 Ppl that try K like it but those who try it FUCKIN LOVE IT
Yeah sounds about right, I've had bad K holes where I thought I'd be stuck like it forever and "I've finally done it this time now you're fucked mentally stuck like this" or dead and yet I still take it agsin, having bad K holes used to put me off for months on end, now I pass it off as a bad K hole
 

nznity

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This is a really helpful and interesting review. Thanks for taking the time to write it up. I’ve been thinking about trying ketamine but am scared of getting caught in just the kind of experience you describe. I’ve always had a bit of a problem with LSD where my mind works too hard to keep a grip on reality leading to bad trips. The few times I’ve been able to just let go my trips have been life alteringingly wonderful but more often its like I’m on a train leaving the station but trying as hard as I can to keep one foot on the platform and getting pulled apart. On the other hand the intensity you describe at the beginning sounds about the level of mainlining coke which I love (maybe because it only lasts a few minutes before he return to sanity)
K's Soooo different compares to LSD. In fact u can't compare it yo anything. It's the most bizarre drug out there AND it only lasts 20min.
 

nznity

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Yeah sounds about right, I've had bad K holes where I thought I'd be stuck like it forever and "I've finally done it this time now you're fucked mentally stuck like this" or dead and yet I still take it agsin, having bad K holes used to put me off for months on end, now I pass it off as a bad K hole
That's me with cocaine xDDD
 

Flower Fairy

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K's Soooo different compares to LSD. In fact u can't compare it yo anything. It's the most bizarre drug out there AND it only lasts 20min.
K is to weird to comprehend but it lasts longer than 20 minutes
 
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