Shit man. Am I gonna die?

deadendgame

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 23, 2014
Messages
356
Hello. I am a 25 year old schizophrenic drug addict. It has been confirmed by my doctor that I am schizophrenic. I take lithium and zyprexa everyday to prevent me from being crazy. I try to lead as much of a normal life as I can. But due to my condition, I cannot go to school. I been trying to get multiple jobs but I keep screwing up because I hear voices and have tremors. Sometimes I'm so confused. How do I handle the voices? There are many sounds in my environment and I have a hard time distinguishing the sounds that are important and noise. Like when multiple people speak, whose voice should I listen in on? Sometimes the voice is generated in my own head. How do I deal with the sound in the environment? If someone is telling me to call 911 and another person is asking me to get high, I will get high and fail to call 911. Why are people so hard on me? I'm not a bad person. I try to be the best person I can be and I attempt to express my compassion as best I can, but people will still misunderstand me. There is a timer and that timer will go to zero when all my resources from my parents like money and time are sucked up. I will be on the street and starve to death. I know this is an inevitability, so how can I delay this?
 
I feel you on this. Dual diagnosis is tough. I'm dealing with similar issues right now and it can seem hopeless at times. It is possible to put the pieces back together, bit by bit, step by step. I know it seems impossible at times but it's not. There is help out there, you just have to be persistent and keep reaching for it. Thinking of the worst possible outcome as being an inevitability will only keep you from helping yourself enough to prevent it, it will become a self fulfilling prophecy. A lot of addicts fall into this trap, i know I have, I'm still trying to break free of it. Get yourself whatever help you can right now. If that means rehab, therapy, the fucking psych ward even. Do something. I know you've heard it all and nothing seems to help but you have to keep trying. Either that or you can just give up, roll over and die. Don't know if any of that helps, just wanted to let you know there are others out there struggling with you. Don't give up.
 
IMO you a experiencing the beginning of an evolution in the human mind. The voices are the first step in two traditionally separated portions of your own brain being able to verbally communicate.

I would develop communication in this fashion. The difficulty in this is what part of your mind your communicating with. If you look at the voices I think you will find they can easily be correlated with normal human emotion though they now take verbal form. You really need to realize what part of you doing the talking;)

Is It Possible To Live With The Voices In Your Head? Eleanor Longden

If you can work this right it may end up being a great gift
 
I started having this problem in 2013. luckily, I mastered my verbal ability and analytical skills before then. now I'm just becoming more retarded as I have trouble learning new things
 
IMO you a experiencing the beginning of an evolution in the human mind. The voices are the first step in two traditionally separated portions of your own brain being able to verbally communicate.

Yeah hearing voices telling you to kill yourself and wandering around the street barking like a dog is evolution. 8)

I'm pretty sure we've had this disagreement in the past.

Oh and the people that violently attack relatives because they think they're being poisoned or that they're plotting to do them harm... Yeah definitely evolution.
 
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Isn't that devolution? Something kind of mind control? They are trying to make humans remotly controlled since 1960th.
I think if its really evolution - we can talk only with our minds and can turn it on and of.
And with usefull adivices - I would really call it evolution.

Voices in the head - hmm, many answers from diffrent persons:
Normal doctor - you are mind ill
Shaman - will tell you that they are ghosts
Esoterik - Something will talk to you (channeling)
etc...

Can you provide more informaton?
 
It's difficult to imagine what you're going through. Have you tried going to a treatment facility that specializes in dual diagnosis and mental health?
Most treatment facilities have scholarship programs which can make it easier on the pocket. Please get professional help.
 
What dosage of the olanzapine do you take? Have you heard the voices before, over an extended period of time, and how did these experiences change when you got on the medications, especially the olanzapine? What drugs have you been addicted to, and how did they affect your symptoms?

It's a quite potent anticholinergic. Many if not all of these antipsychotics are very probably based on a completely flawed theory back from the 50's and can and do hurt more than help! Maybe you could improve when you switch to an anti-excitatory agent like pregabalin / gabapentin / valproate / tiagabine / GABOB / memantine / riluzole or just by tapering the olanzapine down & the lithium alone is calming enough...?

I know antipsychotics are still standard these days and prescribed all over the way, but I strongly feel it's wrong and some share my opinion. There is less evidence in my eyes for the dopamine blockade (and even less for the choline blockade, which just 'alleviates' the adverse effects from dopamine blockade at the price of potential delirium!) than against it!

Addictive behaviour as well as psychosis / schizophrenia has recently been linked to glutamatergic (excitatory) dysregulation. The separation between mental and neurological disorders is somewhat obsolete considering these findings ...

Really wish you'll find a treatment that works better for you! :)
 
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Yeah. I know right? I told them that these medications do no good. These assholes put me on 40 mg of zyprexa when I was in the hospital. I couldn't refuse because it would delay my discharge. I started hearing voices after I took the drugs. I never heard voices before. I know it was a bad choice but that was only because I was addicted to adderall. I thought maybe the meth would be a little more potent and I was doing that so I could ween myself off the adderall. Olanzapine does no good. That's what I've been telling them. I keep getting these nasty side effects and have yet to reap the therapeutic benefit. So I stopped taking it. The lithium I still take because they built up such a high serum concentration of it in my blood that it's hard to come off.
 
You need to stop the olanzapine then really. It's not that uncommon for this drug to actually induce hearing voices (listed as a 'common' side effect) and in your case it seems to be true. If you need an antipsychotic, try to get switched to risperidone or (ami)sulpride which don't share this particular mechanism but probably you don't need it on the long term.
 
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