dating a non- drug user ?

Have any of you ever gone out with or are going out with a non drugie ? or even someone who used to use drugs but not any more but does not mind if YOU yourself use drugs?
does that even make fucking sense ? you know what i mean ,its something that has been on my mind alot lately ,you know does it work ? can it work ? what problems have any of you guys or girls experienced in one of these relationships ? did a search and came up with nothing so if anyone knows of any links it would be much appreciated.
thank you very much.
(() (() (() lifes pretty straight without spliffies (() (() (()

Yes, my last girlfriend didnt do ANY drugs, and she never understood the hugs, the non stop dancing and why my affection would be so HIGH when I was on pills. She found it dirty and disgusting. HMF!
BUT, the funny thing.. she HATED me doing it, yet her friends (which she had known longer than me) could rack up coke and speed and have pills, and she would have problems doing with them doing it.
She would justify doing them doing it by saying they don't do it as much as me.
I would say, unfortunately, that's what drove us to break up. Not because I used drugs from time to time, but because she would never try to understand my reasons. She did so much that I didn't agree with but I understood, yet it was too hard for her.
I would say it can be hard, but it really depends on the person you are dating.

me! and I couldn't be happier. Not only is my gf a non user but also a non raver ie - she doesn't enjoy the music - "it's just noise".
We've been going out for 3 + years now and never really had any probs. I'm glad she doesn't pill or party cause she helps me get balance in my life between parties, work and relationship.
The biggest probs we have is when I have a big saturday / friday nite and it puts me no mood to do anything the next day cause I'm either too tired / asleep / coming down. But I just make it up to her by taking her out somewhere like mcdonalds or kfc
I think you'll find that you may have to make some compromises re parties when dating a non user but isn't that what relationships are often about? And spending time with your gf is just as much fun as 'raving' except in different areas so you're really not missing out ...
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Shut up. If I wanted to listen to an arsehole, I would have farted.

tolerance and respect.
those two words alone will make or break a relationship... especially where drugs are involved.
not just on the partners behalf having to understand your habit, but you must also respect your parnters beliefs not to take anything, and at times, refrain yourself from taking stuff...
nuff said from me..
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Personally, I think its rather healthy.
This does not just apply to intimate relationships, but to your circle of freinds aswell. Some of the best and oldest freinds I have are not even remotely accociated with the scene or drugs. It really helps me to keep balance within my life, and have fun in ways that do not include going out and being a psychonaut. The scene we are in is one that is easy to get into, hard to get out of. Ignore this at your peril...
Basically, its always good to seek out and socialise with those out of your comfort zone.
I still love the scene and stuff, but there are other things I like to chase as well. To use a hackneyed cliche, variety is the spice of life! *cringe* (uhh, cant believe I said that)

Hey well on the same kinda note, maybe half semitone higher/lower Would anyone consider giving drugs up altogether or at least reduce their intake due to their partner dissaproving? Orrrrr has anyone considered dating a non drug user for the reason that they wish to give up drugs and that it would be easier this way?

Pigsney: i think if you were taking drugs often, and you started going out with someone who disagreed with it, you'd naturally start taking less and less drugs. If your partner wasn't going out, then in spending more time with them, you'd be out less, therefore having drugs less. maybe, anyway...
generally, one of my friends who pills with us occasionally (he's a bluelighter but he never posts) has a non-pilling gf. she doesn't disapprove (not actively anyway), but she's not into it in any way. she doesn't like the music or the scene, never been to a rave, actually. She doesn't mind him doing it tho, cos she knows he loves it. it's just not for her. their relationship is going great guns, so i don't think the drug thing is an issue at all...
on the other hand, my GF and i go out and take drugs together reasonably often. i love it! there's nothing better than peaking with someone you love. well, maybe one thing, but yeah, you can't do that in a crowded club
$0.02.

wanna bet DQ?????
the couple in the cubicle next to me at belfast didn't seem to think so.....
bk
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.... if only i'd have found you sooner, maybe you'd have found me saner ....

I've got a friend who's GF is VERY anti-drugs, and claims to not like him doing them at all. But he tells me that deep down she probably really likes it when he does drugs - something about "speed dick" apparantly... oh well, as long as they're both happy in their own special way...

^^^
Now thats a fetish I will never understand...

I dated an X drug taker for about a year. It was harder on me than on her. I would say it is cool if you want too but I wont pressure you. Do what you want just look after yourself.
She hated me for doing it cause she knew what she was missing out on. She caused the only comedown I have ever had after a weekend out.
Damn it I cried to Armageddon
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Life is short, Roll hard

Nezo - "takin her out to Mcdonalds or KFC" - this is a piss take I hope...
Jeez My GF would want to go the Flower Drum if I played up all weekend...
BCR

Mr Samadhi and I have been together for 2.5 years, and we dabble in substances together...no probs...if i had to choose one person to come down with..he would be it. The beautiful thing is that we both tend not to talk when we're coming down on speed, except for the necessary questions...wanna coffee/drink?hehe. There are NO uncomfortable silences We also do lots of other things together, without drugs (drugs take up only a very small % of our lives tothether)
Having said that (sorry, off topic) we have lots of mates who don't use anymore/haven't used before, and like thoth said, it's very balancing.
We wont do it forever, we don't go hard, we roll at home and go out straight, i love having my fiancee as my best friend, lover AND partner in crime/party buddy, so to speak...works very well
[This message has been edited by samadhi (edited 17 August 2001).]
[This message has been edited by samadhi (edited 17 August 2001).]

i know of GF's who have stopped their partners from going out...because they disapprove of them taking drugs, despite the other person insisting that it isnt the case and that they are happier now, which is cool, but it does happen heaps. there are so many people in this society who frown so negativly at drugs and the stigma that surrounds them. many people cant and may never see past it all....
ive found non user/user relationships never last and its always harder on the user, cause the non user (and ecspecially if its a girl, we all know they can be hard to deal with) will claim the moral ground, and make you feel like your doing something wrong, each time you do somehting you enjoy... so thats why the relationships bust, becase:
A: no one wants to be with a nark who doesnt try to understand you at all and just forces their own opinions and beleifs upon you
B: the non user thinks so much less of the person for taking drugs and/or continuing taking drugs and bails
C: all of the above
Personally people with 0 tolerance on drugs shit me and i dont like to associate with them, cause i find them to be very close minded people (in regards to most things, not just drugs) and unless i was clean as whistle i dont think i would ever want to be with one.
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the secret to success is clean underwear and a good top hat

If I had a girlfriend, she'd either have to take drugs, or at least accept and not challenge my decision to take them.
However I highly doubt that a relationship between me, and someone of the mindset that drugs are bad and she shouldn't take them, would last long...
That said, I'm willing to be corrected, quite willing...
*nods to Stylin* While balance is important, and it's good to associate with people who don't take drugs, I'd have nothing to do with people who stubbornly insist that drugs are evil and you're a filthy low-life druggie if you take them. I'd try to enlighten them, and if they didn't listen... goodbye... And that goes for everyone, not just a prospective girlfriend...
[This message has been edited by Tarsarlan (edited 17 August 2001).]

I've been at both good and bad non-using partners.
I've had one partner who was TOTAL anti-drug. She used to come to raves, but never dropped and looked down on people (yes including me) that did. She tried to tell me she didnt think less of people who did, and all the rest, but you could tell that was a crock. She was one of the people who 'knows all about it and how it feels' without ever touching it. She didn't respect it, or me, so that one was never going to work.
Then I had one who was non-user as well. Came clubbing sometimes, but never raving (I was more clubber than raver at that point anyway). But I never once made to feel that I shouldn't be doing what I was. We respected eachothers choices and got on with the rest of our lives.
So yes, it can work, but only if the other person wishes to remain open minded. Hell, only if BOTH of you remain open minded.
Trust, respect and accept. Thats what counts.
--
MDMA-4-ALL (Er... except for that first ex)

thankfully my gf doesn't look down on me, well, at least not cause of drugs We have arguements about drugs but neither of us see it as a take it or leave proposition - I guess we agree to disagree.
BCR - yeah, I was kidding - but we saving to go overseas in oct so at the moment, there's a ring of truth...just not at that extreme...
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Shut up. If I wanted to listen to an arsehole, I would have farted.

cancle, I think we're going out with the same girl.
Likes the music, doesn't do drugs, does'nt break my balls.
and she is amazingly beautiful.
I couldn;t have it any other way.

tars: i agree about associating with non drug takers, but im talking about 0 tolerance, doesnt repesect drug takers and their choice, hard liners who reffer to people who take drugs as junkies etc...]
these people generally make me sick

my thoughts exactly Stylin.
as i said in my previous post, respect and tolerance.
it is unfair for one partner to respect the others CHOICE not to take drugs, but unfair if that partner does not respect the other's CHOICE to take drugs...
cant wait till the day it rains pills....
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