Shy or just quiet?

Some people seem to be quite outgoing and vociferous (or outspoken, just incase I picked the wrong word ) on the internet, while in real life they are a lot more restrained. Hell, some people's vocabulary is also improved online
So what's the deal? Well you're sitting behind a computer, you don't have people talking over you, you can take your time replying, you can think of what you are going to say before you actually say it... That doesn't mean I'm not gonna spew forth some crap once in a while, but I don't like saying something which is gonna get me in trouble or is gonna be taken the wrong way. If that happens online, its a simple matter to reply to whatever has been said and clear up the situation, but in Real Life the person I'm talking to could walk off in a huff, or someone else could but in, or the other person could start screaming at me
...So what the hell am I crapping on about now? Well just that I don't feel the need to fill all the silences with meaningless smalltalk, and if I have anything interesting to say I will say it, but a lot of the time that could be misconstrued (there goes those big words again, looks like it's spelt wrong tho, anyone wanna correct me? ) as being shy. Hopefully I make up for that apparent shyness in other ways...
Anyway, enough about me
Let me ask you, are you the same online and in Real Life? Do you spin as much crap on here as you do in person?
Also, do group situations do down any differently to one-on-one situations?
{edit} Umm and I guess you should think about what you're gonna post before replying to this 'cos the server is overloaded by all the crap that people post without thinking... co-incidence that I posted this at the same time? hmm.... {/edit}
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-=Common Sense isn't all that common=-
[This message has been edited by Tarsarlan (edited 05 December 2000).]

well i used to spin as much crap on here as i do in person..

well tarsarlan, you know me irl, so you know i'm pretty quiet until i start talking (if you know what i mean).. i dont say much til a subject i have something to say something about comes up. then i seem to have LOTS to say! and lots n lots... hehe.. same online i guess
but i dont do well at small talk. partly cuz i was painfully shy as a kid. partly cuz im socially retarded and dont know how. mostly cuz i just dont like it really. but then, how else do you get to the good stuff w/ someone you dont know too well? i dunno hehe
i've gotten over the shyness, but im still not good at smalltalk. i can stand on the pill testing stall and talk away to complete strangers no worries. hell, at meetups i'll talk to anyone, at least, if they talk to me first heh. but if i seem quiet, its just cuz i dont really know what to say
so, there. i dont know if thats how i come across in person, or on bluelight. i dont really care haha i'm just lil ol me for better or worse, nuthin much i can do bout it =)
oh yeah, and for some reason, when i'm rolling or often when speeding, i get quieter! very weird.
=)

Eeem, i guess i'm shy, till i get to know the person, then u can't shut me up!!
well actually depends on the person/situation/mood and lotsa other things.
but yeah i have to agree with atomica
when i'm on anything i get quieter!! can't talk at all!
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~~Parisa~~

atomica, we seem to be able to babble on with each other pretty well!
i guess it depends on the level with which we are comfortable with the other person.
and i think theres no need to dribble shit all the time... comfortable silences are good too.
but with pple who are very up-to-date with wats going on in my life, i guess theres just more to talk about. with those who are not, its not so much being shy or quiet, just a matter of not sure where to start?

i think eagleyes needs to reply to this thread!!

I agree.
I'm a different person online than in real life. But again thats only until you get to know me, then i open up. Talking online breaks down that first barrier you have to get over in meeting someone. You can be the person you wanna be online, or any person you want really. Here you can say what you want to people and not really have to care about what they say, coz ther not in your face and you may not know them (although that is becoming harder with nearly all BL's getting together for this huge National Meetup), but thats good, coz now your all friends. Imagine what would happen if we put all you guys in a room and you didn't know each other. WOW that'd be kewl to see, i bet half your friends now would be different. You can tell i studied Psychology at school can't you??
Anyway i'd be interested to hear from someone who is the same online as they are in person.
Interesting thread.
Keep the spirit alive~
DJC

I think that most of you guys that know me will vouch that I speak just as much crap in person.

I'm shy around strangers but im very open once i get to know someone.

yer..im pretty outgoing on here and stuff.......in real life....i start out kinda shy.....and some ppl mistake that for being snobby..when its totally the opposite..once i feel comfortable in a group...and open up....ill talk ya head off.....i love to meet new people..old people..ANY people
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StOp ThE WorlD...i WaNNa gEt oFF

I'm totally with atomica on this one.
I used to be really shy (a bit of a social outcast) as a kid in high school, and alot of that shows through today in my inability to do small-talk in real life. I like talking to people and I love meeting people, but I just don't know what to say most of the time.
One I get to know someone then I open right up, but I rarely get to that point with people. I guess thats why I'm terrible at picking up in Bars or at parties
This is also why I started, and continued, to take E. On it I can do some smalltalk, or cut right to the sort of talk I'd have with my best friends, and nobody minds the jump info familiarity because they know I'm E'ing.
However online I can take my time to respond, and I usually on respond to something I'm interested in.
Mort
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well i for one am much more outgoing on the net...im quite shy in person when i meet ppl for the first time...well in large groups in general. however when im around ppl im comfortable with i think im quite similar to the way i am on here.
at uni i study psyc so im a natural at watching ppl...find it fascinating...so it tends to be what i do when im in a large group of ppl.
one on one im easygoing and like i am on here

I'm the same person on here as I am the net - I gotta learn to stop rambling - just ask *sunflower* hehehhehe
[This message has been edited by haste (edited 05 December 2000).]

yeh i'm definately shy b4 i get to know someone but once i know them i will chat all day!
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Bars.

I think I fall into the category that most people here do - quiet until you get to know me. A lot of us are like that for a reason - the computer/internet! It's much easier behind a screen. More appealing to the shy/quiet type of person...
Though lately I have felt myself coming out of my shell somewhat, and can sometimes be as obnoxious as I am on here...
That may have something to do with nocturnal_chick. She is exact OPPOSITE. Hardly says much online, but in real life - YOU CAN'T SHUT HER UP!
A complete nutter - which is why I love her so

Well my problem is the opposite. online i seem to have to force myself to think of anything interesting to write, in fact if it wasnt that some of these post are quite interesting coupled with the fact that its hols and im bored i probably woudn't post at all. In fact i was a lurker for at least 9 months before i did post anything.
however in person i am very outgoing and will chat with anyone anytime (well at least i think so ) i believe my problem has to do with the fact that i am dyslexic (OMG that might be speld right) and that i generally dislike everything i put in writing whereas in social situations i find that i am quite loud and sometimes offputing
i cringe as i hit submit
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It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
[This message has been edited by Yoda (edited 06 December 2000).]

I knew this was going to come up sooner or later. Oh well I guess I can't avoid the truth for much longer.
Yes I am more outgoing on the internet, but I think that's because I find it easier to communicate with people easier on here than I do in real life. I wouldn't really say I'm shy though, maybe when I meet someone for the first time and then after a bit I'll start talking more.
So I'm just quiet not shy.

I guess I am like everyone eles. When I meet people for the first time I am pretty reserved until I feel comfortable in really opening up. Once I am feel comfortable with someone there is no shutting me up. I would post more on BL if my computer had not blown up and I had to use a internet cafe to post. If my computer still worked you all would think I ramble to much. Can not wait till I get a new one!!!!!

I class myself as shy. Although i have been told otherwise.
I think that it is easier to open up over the internet due to a few factors (other than whats already been mentioned).
We are communicating with people who have a similar interest. Mainly the people who involve themselves with a site, the subject matter of the board is a main interest in the persons life. Common ground is a great place to meet people, after which sharing of differences are learned from readily.
We are able to respond to questions without the unusual obstacles that hold a person back from being themselves. Like sharing your own opinion or just being quizzical.
We have nothing to hide. We have the freedom to express ourself with written language, in any way we choose.
This board attracts exceptionally open-minded people because of the subject matter. I think a lot of know about PLUR. And the people who know about PLUR soon get the drift, or they drift away.
Thats a lot to say for someone who does not visit the board often, i make my assumptions on my infrequent visits, and knowing a few people on the board, personally.
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"Be good, if you can't be good, be careful, if you can't be careful, buy a pram."

well ill put it like this, I can be who I am online if it's called upon. But ordinarily I'm quiet, and I'm really bad at talking to someone who I feel is on a different level.
Sometimes I just can't think of things to say, but more commonly it's because I'd rather be with just one or two friends and about drugs and weight training (note: a sport which you do by yourself), something I like doing by myself.
If I don't talk to someone it means I feel uncomfortable around them for the time being until I get to know them, and with me that takes a LONG time. Even if the person is nice as to me, its plainly obvious that I'm not comfortable or don't like them...so the trouble is a lot of people get fed up of waiting for me to get comfortable with them.