Best short term drugs for suicidal depression and PTSD prevention

Urgent: Best short term drug for suicidal depression and PTSD prevention (triggering)

I took Kratom, 6g (strong as 20mg hydro), tramadol 50mg, and diazepam 2.5mg at 8:00pm, and 10mg of Norco at t+1:00 and the Temaz 15mg and Clonaz 1mg at t+1:30.

I am suicidially depressed at the moment, and something terrible happened happened tonight, so I am wary of taking any more benzos/any alcohol that might synergize and cause a blackout or a loss of inhibition to go ahead with the plan, but am by no means "benzoed out" due to my moderate tolerance. This is all the equivalent of 30mg diazepam taken over time.

My question is, which extra medications can I take JUST for tonight (short-term) to prevent me from killing myself? I really want help, and the benzos helped me get my mind straight tonight after a particularly intense situation and realize that I didn't have to kill myself. I am thinking about taking Remeron if it gets bad, never taken a Rx AD before but I have Remeron I was thinking to take at 7.5 to knock me out, 15mg for anxiolysis, or 30-45mg for the AD effect, but since that dosage acts with NE, I'll wait for my panic attacks to subside and anxiety to fade in to a hopeless and disappointing depression. I also have anticonvulsants like Neurontin and AD's like Zoloft, and Cymbalta.

They are wearing off a bit, and I am moderately opiated and a moderate level of benzoed. I feel like I need to take a bit more Kava-Kava, L-Theanine, or Gabapentin to keep anxiolysis going until tomorrow (I'm not allowed to sleep tonight), I just am wondering if my judgement is skewed with the benzos I'm on now. I am thinking more opiates (15mg hydro and 37.5mg tram) shouldn't hurt now, but I don't want to do non-benzo drugs like Theanine or Gabapentin and potentiate the shit out the nice, albiet low, dosage of benzos I'm on right now.

I've told my parents that I would give them my benzos if I seriously considered killing myself like I did a few days ago, and I tried to tell them so I can help myself not do it. Opiates are usually a godsend for suicidal depression, (a bit of Kratom/hydro) yesterday and I'm not particularly dependant (3-5g of kratom each morning for a year), but have used enough hydro over this summer to make it safe. The reason I'm posting this and why I told my parents is beacuse I don't want to die right now, and want to prevent myself from getting too benzoed but also prevent myself from getting underbenzoed and overly anxious. This shows that I'm fighting for survival, that some part of me still thinks life is worth it, it's just the facts of dealing with serious chronic pain, social isolation, family hositility, and a felony conviction in the early 20's that's making me not see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Would beta blockers help in preventing PTSD from tonight? I can't fall asleep, though, need to take care of something in the home before morning time.

Edit: Totally forgot about cannabis. A lot of people have problems with it causing anxiety, but indicas are very relaxing and anxiolytic to me. I am very tolerant now, so indicas act as a pure anxiolytic if I am smoking alone, that always made me feel better this week when I the serious depression got even more severe. And, it prevents PTSD from forming if administered in a timely fashion after the incident.

I am starting to nod a bit from the opiates, I think this clonazepam and temazepam is now peaking (t+3:15), amazing clear-headed anxiolysis from the clonaz with a nice physical relief aspect from all three benzos (they are all great muscle relaxants). I will take a booster dose of hydrocodone, as I believe opiates are the safest and most effective occasional medicine for suicial nights, just don't get dependent on them...

Edit2: I took a 20mg dose of hydrocodone at t+

Hi there, ErgicMergic.

Because the content of your thread involves multiple references that may be considered triggering to those in recovery on addictions, I am going to move this thread to the forum Ither Drugs. I am confident you will receive the advice you seek there.

Be well, and good luck!

~ Vaya

Wouldn't it be best to add to the title (MAY TRIGGER) and keep it in the dark side. The darkside does have threads purely involving certain substances, so its not like there aren't already some triggering threads in existence, and people know if the title says Opioid addiction help, that there may be some talk about opioids within it. I don't think OD is the best place for this thread by a long shot.

I wouldn't mess with weed even if it normally relaxes you because it isn't fully predictable. I don't see how beta blockers would do anything more than sedate you more, and I don't know how they interact with what you have already taken. If Remeron will knock you out then go for it. I have taken Seroquel when I was feeling shitty and just wanted to fall asleep.

The other option is more opioids, but what goes up must come down. Actually opioids aren't bad in that respect, I meant more from a tolerance/dependence standpoint. I'm sure you know to be careful with mixing that with the benzos though, so maybe that is best left alone.

I say go with the Remeron.

quetiapine will knock you into a sleep, but it does fuck all to improve mood, at least for me.
benzos have worked for me in this regard, however there's always the risk of rebound symptoms with those. straight up strong opioids are probably the best bet, but like the poster above me stated, there are again a lot of risks involved. after my last smack binge i felt like utter dogshit for a day or two.

Cloudy said:

Wouldn't it be best to add to the title (MAY TRIGGER) and keep it in the dark side. The darkside does have threads purely involving certain substances, so its not like there aren't already some triggering threads in existence, and people know if the title says Opioid addiction help, that there may be some talk about opioids within it. I don't think OD is the best place for this thread by a long shot.

Click to expand...

OD mods, in consideration of this insightful reply, pease determine whether or not this thread belongs here in OD or feel free to move it back to TDS.

Thanks, Cloudy.

~ Vaya

After suffering from depression for years, I can honestly say that sobriety + occasional ketamine usage are the only things that genuinely help.

Here's some info regarding therapeutic ketamine use: http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/...al-Ketamine-Regimen!-(V-1-5-UPDATED-11-22-10)

Definitely avoid benzos!
Good luck.

Please don't follow through with any plans of suicide.

You really need to go get professional help.

Long term use of drugs can cause your symptoms. Withdrawals can cause you to feel like this.

When the chemicals in your brain are off you feel depressed and suicidal.

Please go seek medical treatment.

I hope you are ok. Please respond back when you wake up.

Your a really cool person. Please stay with us.

out of personal experience i would not take rememeron,
it made me even more suicidal/depressed they day after,
in a such a way i would follow through with the plan as you say

if cannabis works, smoke it!
i dearly miss cannabis right now, how it alleviates my anxiety/depression/ptsd is much needed :c

best of luck my friend

GHB is the best drug for lifting my spirits right away..

belfort said:

GHB is the best drug for lifting my spirits right away..

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i second this. it can be horribly addictive though.

I'm sorry I just don't think this thread is appropriate for OD, and it's too triggering for TDS. I'm going to make a judgement call and close this, its essentially a what do I take thread with a serious motive, and I offer you my support EM, feel free to PM me.


Drugs aren't usually the first line of treatment for suicidal ideation anyways and the medications they use later are not fun. At the hospital, they'd probably give you IV lorazepam and when that fails, a major tranquilizer/antipsychotic