I am a slave to pharms. Specifically, oxycodone. I get a monthly supply of them that most people would envy; but they never last the entire month. I wish I knew how to make them last and still be comfortable; but I am afraid that the medication has become embedded into my personality.
I feel like a completely different person when I am on the meds; I feel like I can accomplish anything, and I usually set out and do it. I am searching for a way to have that same euphoria without the drugs. I am also torn between continuing to take the medication and then deal with the few days of depresion and withdrawals; or kick the meds completely. Both options are like figured on my shoulder; trying to pull me in either direction.
Also, I must mention that I have legitimate pain; I was in the military and suffered a broken back in the line of duty. After I came back to civilian life; I continued to work as a medic and have been a medic up until about a year ago. (I still have my medical license; but I no longer practice.) I exacerbated my back injury and found that I no longer had the physical capability to continue to lift and move patients. Not to mention that I lost my ability to show compassion to the sick individuals that I would come into contact with. A career in medicine can destroy both your body and your mind.
I live with a few mental health conditions and I try to do the best that I can o control them; but the more I seek help, the more medications they throw at me. Surley there has to be a way to treat these disorders; other than just trying to subdue the mind with anti-psychotics! I am so frustrated with this entire ordeal.
I joined BL a few years ago and have silently browsed through the catacombs of posts; trying to find the best way to get the most out of my medications. I just recently decided to introduce myself and make my own mark and share my own experiences with various medications. I really appreciate the presence of this site and it's helpfulness to people like myself, can be overlooked. I can't note how many times information from this site has helped prevent me from making some serious mistakes in my self medication.
I don't do any illicit narcotics and I will rarely buy off of another person as it is so easy for me to obtain additional prescriptions from my doctor. However, I feel like I am coming dangerously close to venturing outside of the oxycodone and trying something else. I am looking for that wonderful euphoria and I think I am now ready to try and see if I can locate it and keep it forever. I really don't want to lose my creative side, though. That is my money maker and that is the problem that I am having with medications for my mental health issues. All those pills seem to do is 'disable' parts of my brain and re-route my thoughts. I hope that makes sense...
At any rate; I am glad to finally be a participating member and look forward to interacting with the forums and learning new things.
Ms
I feel like a completely different person when I am on the meds; I feel like I can accomplish anything, and I usually set out and do it. I am searching for a way to have that same euphoria without the drugs. I am also torn between continuing to take the medication and then deal with the few days of depresion and withdrawals; or kick the meds completely. Both options are like figured on my shoulder; trying to pull me in either direction.
Also, I must mention that I have legitimate pain; I was in the military and suffered a broken back in the line of duty. After I came back to civilian life; I continued to work as a medic and have been a medic up until about a year ago. (I still have my medical license; but I no longer practice.) I exacerbated my back injury and found that I no longer had the physical capability to continue to lift and move patients. Not to mention that I lost my ability to show compassion to the sick individuals that I would come into contact with. A career in medicine can destroy both your body and your mind.
I live with a few mental health conditions and I try to do the best that I can o control them; but the more I seek help, the more medications they throw at me. Surley there has to be a way to treat these disorders; other than just trying to subdue the mind with anti-psychotics! I am so frustrated with this entire ordeal.
I joined BL a few years ago and have silently browsed through the catacombs of posts; trying to find the best way to get the most out of my medications. I just recently decided to introduce myself and make my own mark and share my own experiences with various medications. I really appreciate the presence of this site and it's helpfulness to people like myself, can be overlooked. I can't note how many times information from this site has helped prevent me from making some serious mistakes in my self medication.
I don't do any illicit narcotics and I will rarely buy off of another person as it is so easy for me to obtain additional prescriptions from my doctor. However, I feel like I am coming dangerously close to venturing outside of the oxycodone and trying something else. I am looking for that wonderful euphoria and I think I am now ready to try and see if I can locate it and keep it forever. I really don't want to lose my creative side, though. That is my money maker and that is the problem that I am having with medications for my mental health issues. All those pills seem to do is 'disable' parts of my brain and re-route my thoughts. I hope that makes sense...
At any rate; I am glad to finally be a participating member and look forward to interacting with the forums and learning new things.
Ms
