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Yeah I'm OK

syd

syd

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 18, 2005
Messages
273
It’s hard to believe all those people were just here.
Broken and trashed with alcohol related everything, drugs and apathy helping them fake it.
They talk and they talk and they fucking talk.
All the while you sit and try to hear to the song on your stereo.
What’s up man?
And this stranger, this fucking guest of a guest, had the balls to ask you the question you loath above all others.
You alright?
And what exactly were you supposed to say to that.
No, I’m not alright.
I am constantly on the verge of some sort of unacceptable behavior.
Constantly worried my life will never add up to anything more than empty bottles.
Everyday pushing people further away before they have a chance to hurt me.
I’m worried my various addictions no longer have any redeeming value.
I’m always throwing up my hands, always shrugging my shoulders, always saying, “I don’t know,” or “I gotta go,” or my favorite, “I forgot.”
My life has become a series of long longings.
I can’t talk.
I have diarrhea of the mouth when I do.
I think I’ve got cancer, emphysema, heartburn and an ingrown toenail.
I sabotage myself so I’m never let down.
Instead of saying any of this you looked towards you drink, and downed it while mumbling something about being tired.
 
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Oh man, you have no idea much I relate to this at the moment... it's like you've extracted my very thoughts and written them far more eloquently than I could hope to.


Thankyou for posting this :)
 
I am really beginning to warm to your writing. I was always a little unsure because a lot of the things you write are on such a similar theme... and always downbeat in my eyes.

But it seems, the more I read your writing, the more I see a snapshot from your head!

I imagine you pacing the floor, ranting, when I read your work, the very picture of eloquence.

Glad I kept on at your work, it's always a pleasure to read it :)
 
Thanks for the replies.

I am really beginning to warm to your writing. I was always a little unsure because a lot of the things you write are on such a similar theme... and always downbeat in my eyes.
Click to expand...

A much better writer than myself once wrote “you should always write what you know.” Drinking/drugs, loss, pain and complicated woman are all pretty familiar to me, hence the repeating themes.

Also I find it much more difficult to write about how wonderful something is rather than what it’s like to loose it.

Thanks for reading. :D
 
Hey, I identify with that... I write about the same one thing over and over pretty much :)
 
thumbs up, once again.




I was always a little unsure because a lot of the things you write are on such a similar theme... and always downbeat in my eyes.
Click to expand...


As to comment on the comment: That is what makes his writing so fucking awesome!
Because I sure as hell know that not everything is upbeat... hell, for me, I find the fucking misery in everything I do. And that is not necessarily a bad thing.
Nothing he says is candy-coated. It's straight facts.

Anyway ....
=D
I saw another floating around I must read.......
 
And what exactly were you supposed to say to that.
No, I’m not alright.
I am constantly on the verge of some sort of unacceptable behavior.
Constantly worried my life will never add up to anything more than empty bottles.
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Great piece i really like you writing :)
 
Raw freaking truth in my book,,, glad it was to the front page so i didn't miss it....... I think we all wonder if we will really grow up,,,, and afraid if we do... .Welll put !!!
 
you are just wonderful, u know that??
everything i ever wanted to put into a poem/prose, only better.
 
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