Would love some comfort please.

[ahint]

Don't even know if this is the right place or what I'm looking for but I really don't know where to turn right now.
Feeling the lowest I've felt in a while.
Sick of having nobody to connect to, feel like all I have is 'busy' or 'lonely' no other emotions, I just want a frickin drink to drown it out but I don't have the money and I don't want to become an addict again.

The only person I used to connect to was my ex. And I don't know, just feeling so damn hopeless. I don't know what to do.
This isn't super urgent I guess. I'm too apathetic to do anything to hurt myself and enough self control (or lack of money...) to go out and get vodka.

EDIT: feels so much better just to talk about it... Sorry for creating my own thread about it.

 

[DrinksWithEvil]

sounds like you might benefit from a AA meeting. You wont feel alone, everyone there is going through the same feelings as you. time is on your side. these feelings will pass if you stay sober. goodluck =)

 

[n3ophy7e]

Hi ahint, don't apologise for reaching out for help! That is what this forum is here for
How long have you been sober for? It is very common for ex-addicts to suffer depression and anhedonia after they are clean, especially if you've gone through a break-up recently as well! So your feelings are completely normal and kinda expected.

That probably doesn't make you feel any better in itself but it might be reassuring to know that the way you're currently feeling doesn't mean that anything is wrong with you. It just means that you're going through a huge period of change and this is how your mind is reacting to that.

What kind of activities do you do on a daily basis? I personally think that something like exercise, or taking up a new enjoyable hobby of some description is a great method for getting through the post-addiction blues. Exercise in particular is immensely helpful because the endorphins released during/after moderate exercise act as natural mood stabilisers in the brain, so you actually genuinely FEEL better/happier afterwards. Other enjoyable activities act as a distraction from your low mood and inadvertantly make you feel happy because you're doing something productive.

DrinksWithEvil also makes a good suggestion of finding some local AA meetings or something similar, because that will take up time that you might be otherwise just sitting at home feeling depressed, and you'll be socialising and learning coping methods at the same time

Lastly, do you have anyone you can talk to about this at all? A friend or relative? If not, please feel free to PM me any time just to put your thoughts out on the paper, so to speak. Like you said, it really does help just to talk about it

 

[HeWhoHowls]

I can relate somewhat.
A couple months ago i moved from my beloved ghetto in Long Beach.
Seriously, I was never happier than that stage of my life.
I had to move in with my grandparents in another county.
The depression was crushing, homesick wasnt even the right word for it.
I dnt know anyone out here, I spend almost evry waking minute working on starting my adult life.
Shit was so monotonous yet hectic.
I became restless, stressed n irratable; let alone walkin around feeling like a sad pile of poop.
What worked for me was refreshing.
Find somethng to do that you havent done before but have interest in or take the time to do somethng that takes you away from it all.
Its like taking the time to shower n wash off the grime we collect in life.

 

[ahint]

Thanks for the replies.

DrinksWithEvil, cheers, I might look into trying to find a group near me. It sounds stupid but I've always been scared of defined 'alcoholic'. =P

n3ophy7e, thanks for being so welcoming. And I've been sober for about six months now (fricken long time for me), apart from night before last when I slipped.
On a daily basis, I pretty much just sleep in, go on here, read a bit, maybe go for a jog then back to sleep. Gosh that makes my life sound so sad, but I start uni in September so it's only temporary.
Thanks for the tip. Might go jogging more often, or I've always wanted to take up ballet but been too scared to do so...
I don't think I got anyone I can talk to about it, one of the problems is I don't really connect to anyone or have anyone super close to me. I have a psychiatrist, who's awesome, but it's not "talk about this and feel better" sessions, it's usually just doing work to do with my eating disorder. Thankyou so so much for the offer, I may take you up on it if it gets too much. You have no idea how much I appreciate how kind you've been.

HeWhoHowls, sounds like a rough period for ya. And yeah like I said I might take up ballet, always been scared to, but what have I got to lose... Thanks for the advice, really refreshing to find someone who can relate.

 

[HeWhoHowls]

Happy to help

 

[S.M.F.G]

It sounds like ur already on ur way there ahint....
presue these things u want to and have faith that you can succeed
be sure to let us know how things are going for you, theres alot of people here with alot of care and advice/support to give. All the best ul be kept in ma thoughts.

 

[n3ophy7e]

I have a psychiatrist, who's awesome, but it's not "talk about this and feel better" sessions, it's usually just doing work to do with my eating disorder. Thankyou so so much for the offer, I may take you up on it if it gets too much. You have no idea how much I appreciate how kind you've been.

No worries at all hun!
I failed to mention yesterday that I am an alcoholic, and I am currently attempting sobriety and getting counselling, so I can really relate to your situation. I also suffer from eating disorders so we've got that in common as well, so yep, please keep my offer to chat via PMs in mind. A lot of the time it just helps to get your thoughts out "on paper" so to speak
Oh and also, I realise that your psychiatrist is mainly helping you with your ED, but I really think you should mention this to them as well. It is more than likely that your ED and your drinking have some kind of connection in your subconscious, so it wouldn't hurt to just mention it next time you see your psych.
Take care hun

 

[Darksidesam]

Don't even know if this is the right place or what I'm looking for but I really don't know where to turn right now.
Feeling the lowest I've felt in a while.
Sick of having nobody to connect to, feel like all I have is 'busy' or 'lonely' no other emotions, I just want a frickin drink to drown it out but I don't have the money and I don't want to become an addict again.

I know where you are coming from trust me, i live quite a lonely and solitary life. However i dont drink (As i am extremly tight with my money )

Anywho, you can see your problem here , as can I. The root of your problem is lack of social interaction and lack of people you can depend on and have as part of your every day life.
Do you have any anxiety problems? have you/ or others moved away, How comes you dont talk to anyone anymore?
(I moved away to a diff country and came back so thats why i have so little contact with people)

What sort of interests do you have, are you a creative person by any chance?
You need to divert the energy away from the thoughts of drinking and perhaps put it into something creative. Or put the time into going out and socialising or even just going to music / Or other events ? (if thats what you like)


I met some people through facebook and now, Granted i dont see them very often , once a month say, But once a month i go out and have a good time. I could go and see them more but i cant really afford the train fair and stuff so. (Plus i think i can get a bit boring if im around people too long Lol)

I hope you can Resist, its for your own good, good Luck!

 

[miloserp]

Feel ya.

The best way to deal is to not make a straight line into a circle. By that I mean trying to make things go away by getting loaded only makes the circle go around and around and you'll never have a chance to make a good path for yourself. I have been getting over a relationship with a girl I loved dearly but things just didn't work out in the end and I'm still living with my past in that regard. From all my mistakes and experiences I have learned what I want myself to be like and what I can leave behind and it's just a matter of balance so you can live your life the way you want to. Find your path and what you want to be rather than living with that person you hate. Love conquers all.