Benzos are definitely only a treatment for people who already know that it isn't a cure. No mental progress gets made while you're on benzos toward solving the underlying problem. I wouldn't know how to solve the underlying problem; I've always been a benzo addict since a teenager 10 years ago. But I do know that taking them means permanent bad news.
I honestly believed it WAS a cure, actually lol. This is due to the fact that I was prescribed them for a few months when I was a teenager. I had begun to have the worst anxiety in the world; when I got off the xanax, I literally had no withdrawals and my anxiety was gone; it didn't come back until recently (that would be about 7 years later!) So from that point until about two months into my current xanax prescription, I genuinely believed Xanax was a cure-all for anxiety. But of course, now I'm old enough to realize that I should do my research about the things I'm taking, so now I know it wasn't the Xanax at all. In reality, the thing that actually "cured" my anxiety was two things: quitting meth, and finally getting out of a very toxic, emotionally and mentally abusive relationship I was in at the time, as well as discontinuing associating with certain people. I don't know what's up with the whole not having withdrawals thing though.
As for knowing how to solve the underlying problem, that's easy. You just have to pay very close attention to what your triggers are and figure out what it is that's causing your anxiety. At that point, you can either try to solve it yourself (if it's something that's easily fixable)... or you can solve it through counseling (if it's due to PTSD or some sort of traumatic event you haven't yet worked through.) You're right about one thing though, taking them does mean bad news... not sure about it being permanent, but then again, I haven't been on them for ten years and I don't plan to. I'm actually in the process of tapering off right now with the help of an amazing addiction specialist.
Speaking of, have you looked into seeing one of those? Not trying to force anything on you here, but it seems like you're not exactly happy about the fact that you have anxiety and have to take benzos for it, and it sounds to me like you WANT to fix it, you just don't know how. An addiction specialist can definitely help you with that. If they're a good one, they'll help you decide what the best way to taper off is, the best medication(s) to take to help and which ones to start taking instead while you work through the underlying causes, as well as setting you up with all types of counseling programs, support groups, hotlines, etc. that specialize in whatever your addiction is. For instance, mine has been reducing my dose by half a pill a month... a VERY slow taper, which is the best way to go when it comes to benzos if you don't want to go through hell and have to worry about seizures and all that other mess. He also set me up with a variety of programs to choose from that specialize in opiate and benzo addiction/dependence, as well as a good counselor. But he took his job one step further - he didn't forget about the fact that I still have anxiety, so instead of just helping me taper off the benzos and leaving it at that, he helped me find the best medication to replace the Xanax. He put me on Vistaril, which is a non-addictive, non-benzodiazepine anxiolytic that works wonders. That way, I don't have to keep taking more Xanax to get rid of my anxiety, and it will also buy me some time just in case I still haven't completely worked through my anxiety once I'm off the benzos for good. It's like the Suboxone of benzos, lol.
I'm not trying to preach here at all or tell you how to run your life, but like I said... it sounds like you want to change your situation... and I can honestly say from first hand experience that a good addiction specialist can work absolute wonders.
