Why???

[djxlr8]

Have just found out that one of my best friends has committed suicide. I don't know any other details, his ex girlfriend just called me and told me the bad news. I hadn't spoken to him for about 4 weeks, but my other best friend saw him 2 weeks ago and everything seemed fine (I guess). This isn't the first time something like this has happened. The four snowboarders who went missing at Thredbo - they were also good friends going back to school days, the girl who died in Austria was a friends girlfriend - I dj'ed at her 21st. I'm not a religious person, but these were all good people, not just good friends. The scary thing is this morning, I went for a surf at Fairy Bower (near Manly), there are cliffs which you can look down about 40m to the rocks below. Anyway, I went for a bit of a walk before I went in, and just looked over the edge, and for some reason I just wondered what it would be like to jump from that height - not that I would do it, but just curious. Then I get home and the phone rung. I haven't spoken to any of our other friends yet, still coming to terms with the shock of it all, I have all these emotions running around in my head yet all I feel is emptiness. I'm angry - yet I'm sad, I'm bitter, yet feel some strange sense of relief that I cannot explain. This is probably because in the last 2 1/2 years I have seen him go from doing quite well for himself to living on his own and not doing quite so well (don't want to go into details). He wasn't a big "user", but smoked quite a bit of pot which "may" have lead to some depression, but he was always happy to see me and other friends when we dropped by, or went for a surf. He always pushed me in the surf, to catch bigger waves, take off deeper and to always charge!
Daniel, wherever you are, I hope you are riding the biggest wave of your life!
Tim

 

[tranquilo]

There are no answers to the questions you ask, I have asked some of them myself from time to time. I am not a religious person in any traditional way either but will say a prayer for you as, I am sure, will other people out there who read this board.
My girlfriend suffered a traumatic accident last year, which I was responsible for causing in a moment of stupidity. It is impossible to find reasons why things happen and it is a long and difficult process accepting this. I am not even half way there myself yet. Talk to people though, friends, family, complete strangers...I guess you don't need me to tell you that 'cause it took some guts to write the post above.
Take care man.

 

[Hamlet]

Sorry to hear sad news like that...eventually life will end on its own...no need to cut it short yourself...

P L U R

princehamlet

 

[djxlr8]

Just an update, apparantly it was an "accident" not suicide as I had been told. Don't worry, I know i've got too many good things happening in life to risk cutting it short. Thanks for the replys.
Timbo

 

[Orion]

i'm very sorry to hear about your loss.
I admire you for being able to share this news with us.
I can say though, that i was in a position exactly like this and time does heal all.
My prayers are with you.