My story is a long one and can probably be broken up into a few different areas:
First time i got high on marijuana i was 16 in 2002. The day went like this, we were sitting around a table playing spades it was the summer before high school (classic time to start) someone in the group said "do you guys wanna smoke some weed" Now small background I had never used drugs to get high before or drank at that point. I had tried alcohol but couldnt stomach it. So naturally i said "yes how much money do you want" and I gave him 20 dollars and he put in 20 so we could all smoke. I didnt know better because i had literally never encountered drugs in my life but i knew i was curious and wanted to try them. So we all smoked out of an aluminum can and spent the day acting a fool. It wasnt until the 3rd time that i got so high i cant even remember walking back inside. I just suddenly "came too" and was mid sentence about how i was forgetting shit as it was happening and was crying. Right after that i got over it and stopped it was like i couldnt control myself and was concerned for my well being. I still smoke to this day.
For opiates it was a similar story. It was the following year and my friends father got percocet 10mg for a surgery and my friend asked if i wanted to buy them. A senior told him they were valuable and bought 6 so he offered me 2 for 15 dollars. I took them again because i had wanted to try them and figured why not (this is a huge repeating pattern for me) so i spent that day nodding out and answering questions with my head down, ever the participating student lol. Cocaine happened in a much similar fashion the only one that has a different story is heroin.
I starting doing heroin with my current fiance and we discovered it together. We had both had a similar pattern of us, we think something is intriguing and we do it. We had both been doing pain killers very very irregularly until we met each other in fact i think we were both on 6 months since our last oxy when we did it. This of course is where the common pattern started. Weekends became days off of work too which became every 3 days, then 2, then heroin (3, 2, 1, Heroin! lol seemed funny)
Anyway we went from snorting too shooting. I got a better job right before we got into dope and I was making about 75% more money so we could buy even more opiates! Her depression would worsen our addiction would grow, i would get on subs to get clean so we didnt have to feel the effects financially so much, she left her job for a better one which didnt work out again right before dope. Dope stole a lot of her confidence (she always had self esteem and confidence issues) so she never got a job. So the pattern was i would work she wouldnt i would buy drugs and for a while do them and then once on subs i wouldnt so she would get more dope and complain less thus making my life easier. I got into crack because i wanted something that was "my thing" as i would call it. That stopped after my recent relapse, that went on for 3 months i hid it from her for 2 weeks but its hard to hide an IV heroin relapse from someone shooting up for 3 years daily (i also injected her every single time never taught her to do it... suicidal depression on her worst days so no IV teachings for her
)
Here i sit she is on day 12 of no methadone and i am on 20mg. She is back to the girl i met 5 years ago and we are way better for our struggles. We only smoke weed now and are starting to get new friends... i read more about chemistry then drugs for the first time in my life drugs are losing their grasp on me. And i mean the time i devote to them learning about them or getting them not doing them. I know most people gauge stuff by how often they do drugs but drugs take up all aspects of life and i used a shit ton of brain energy understanding their chemistry, I devote that energy to where it should have been, the chemistry of organic compounds as a whole. Its about time!
*It should be noted that when i relapsed i knew what would happen but i was so sick of living the same day over and over spending money on opiates i didnt use. At that time my little bro wasnt in prison and i didnt mind paying for the dope he was getting us but it got to the point where both my girl and my brother were expecting my paycheck and it really pissed me off finally lead to me exclaiming one day when i couldnt get it "wtf why is everyone in the car pissed szuko cant get paid except him!" so i relapsed and now we are all clean lol go figure. didnt plan it but it happened that way and not by my doing at all my relapse just set stuff in motion for my girl and i*
