wizekrak
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2000
- Messages
- 4,250
Ok here's my take for what it's worth, its a little long
First of all those who are attractive have a greater chance of attracting those of the opposite sex. These people usually know that they can get what they want, and they do. They usually become the ones looking for one night stands or just some fun. Now I'm not saying this is the case with everyone but usually most.
Most people want someone who they find to be better then themselves, (ie: better looking, more money, more fun to be with, more exciting, better social scene) it's the challenge of having to work for something you could otherwise get easily (namely getting those who are as attractive or less attractive then you).
Of course there are exceptions, but usually it is the average/ugly people who are the nice guys/girls. They can't get what they want and tend to lack the confidence that comes with repeated success with the opposite sex. Instead of building this confidence early on they are stuck in sexual limbo.
Now most guys who complain about not finding nice girls usually want hot women. And to find hot women they go to bars. The bar is not a good place to pick up "nice" people (this applies to both sexes) those at the bar are "usually" there to get laid, and the women who frequent them are there for the same reason. If you want nice girls to college/university, go to church, volunteer, play organized sports.
Don't forget that only 10% max of the entire female population is very attractive, and relationship material (just an observation don't kill me). The problem happens when 60+% of the male population is gunning for the same girls, not everyone can win, and it's usually those at the very top who get them (ie: attractive, good job, funny, good personality, smart). Those who aren't at the pinnacle lose and complain about there not being any nice girls when they typically aren't desirable enough to compete (when a guy means "nice girl" he usually means nice girl and attractive). Now if a guy has one of these 10% girls odds are he doesn't want to let her go. So all the best ones are usually taken. So the hot girls who are left are typically those with weak personalities, emotional baggage or other problems. It's not that there aren't any nice girls, it's that you don't rate well enough to get one, or they are taken. Keep in mind when I say 'you' its in a general sense.
Most girls value the same things in a mate that guys do. I've seen it before, they go for who they think rates the highest, then they go for who rates the highest among those they think are obtainable.
The problem lies in a combination of things. Since childhood we are told we are special that we are amazing people, but not all of us are. Many believe that they are more desirable then they really are, and rather then accept that they don't rate, they complain. They put the blame on others instead of on themselves.
Also those who complain often don't try to fix the situation. They can do things to make themselves more desirable but don't. So what it comes down to is this:
1) If you are in the top 10% for either sex you got it made.
2) If not change yourself (not everyone wants to),
3) lower your standards (few will do this)
4) get used to being alone while you press on for your ideal mate
OK thats my take, in case it matters I'm a guy, but i'm sure you have probably guessed that by now.
First of all those who are attractive have a greater chance of attracting those of the opposite sex. These people usually know that they can get what they want, and they do. They usually become the ones looking for one night stands or just some fun. Now I'm not saying this is the case with everyone but usually most.
Most people want someone who they find to be better then themselves, (ie: better looking, more money, more fun to be with, more exciting, better social scene) it's the challenge of having to work for something you could otherwise get easily (namely getting those who are as attractive or less attractive then you).
Of course there are exceptions, but usually it is the average/ugly people who are the nice guys/girls. They can't get what they want and tend to lack the confidence that comes with repeated success with the opposite sex. Instead of building this confidence early on they are stuck in sexual limbo.
Now most guys who complain about not finding nice girls usually want hot women. And to find hot women they go to bars. The bar is not a good place to pick up "nice" people (this applies to both sexes) those at the bar are "usually" there to get laid, and the women who frequent them are there for the same reason. If you want nice girls to college/university, go to church, volunteer, play organized sports.
Don't forget that only 10% max of the entire female population is very attractive, and relationship material (just an observation don't kill me). The problem happens when 60+% of the male population is gunning for the same girls, not everyone can win, and it's usually those at the very top who get them (ie: attractive, good job, funny, good personality, smart). Those who aren't at the pinnacle lose and complain about there not being any nice girls when they typically aren't desirable enough to compete (when a guy means "nice girl" he usually means nice girl and attractive). Now if a guy has one of these 10% girls odds are he doesn't want to let her go. So all the best ones are usually taken. So the hot girls who are left are typically those with weak personalities, emotional baggage or other problems. It's not that there aren't any nice girls, it's that you don't rate well enough to get one, or they are taken. Keep in mind when I say 'you' its in a general sense.
Most girls value the same things in a mate that guys do. I've seen it before, they go for who they think rates the highest, then they go for who rates the highest among those they think are obtainable.
The problem lies in a combination of things. Since childhood we are told we are special that we are amazing people, but not all of us are. Many believe that they are more desirable then they really are, and rather then accept that they don't rate, they complain. They put the blame on others instead of on themselves.
Also those who complain often don't try to fix the situation. They can do things to make themselves more desirable but don't. So what it comes down to is this:
1) If you are in the top 10% for either sex you got it made.
2) If not change yourself (not everyone wants to),
3) lower your standards (few will do this)
4) get used to being alone while you press on for your ideal mate
OK thats my take, in case it matters I'm a guy, but i'm sure you have probably guessed that by now.
.That's sadly how I currently feel 
