ValentinoSix
Greenlighter
Five years ago, a Bluelighter named LiLc posted the question, "What's the worst thing you've done to get drug money?" There are some horror stories in that thread and few innocents. But that doesn't mean that no good things have come from being a "tornado, roaring through the lives of others."
As I was cooking up a response to LiLc's post and reflecting upon some of the shameful things I have done, my mind kept wandering back to the days of living next door to a government projects designed exclusively for the elderly and the handicapped. For the addict, living next door to such a place is like living next door to a goldmine. Or winning the lottery. Or some other cliche that suggests a "land of plenty."
During the 5 years I lived next door to the projects, I became very good friends with some very desperate people. The government had pretty much warehoused them, and though it kept them alive, it kept them in poverty (you lose benefits if your life improves). I'd give elderly women rides to the food bank, I took leftover food over after Thanksgiving and other holidays, I kept an eye on people's grandkids while they went to buy lottery tickets and cigarettes, I spent hours and hours talking with a paraplegic dying of loneliness. I did all sorts of things that normal people who are members of normal communities do, but there was the underlying fact it was motivated in part and at first by addiction.
In the first year or so I was doing it primarily for the drug connections. "Need a lift to the food bank? No problem. I'll pick you up at 5. By the way can I get a couple of Opanas when we go?"Over time, however, I actually grew into being a member of the community, and I felt it my duty to help those in need however I could. Drug connections and cheap prices on pills were just additional benefits.
Providing company to the aforementioned paraplegic was probably the noblest thing I ever did for drugs. Tony was an amazing guy but he was hard to look at due to his injuries and deformities, which contributed to his loneliness. We'd spend hours putting together conspiracy theories, apocalypse predictions, imagining the atrocities we'd commit against our enemies, tearing apart computers and sometimes rebuilding them, watching movies he'd illegally downloaded, and chatting up various passersby in the neighborhood. I like to think that my company gave him a little light in his life, and that perhaps he lived as long as he did because I my own drug habit kept him from his habit's full potential. Sadly, and after the last time I saw him, he was dead within hours. One of the few people from a semi-sordid past whom I truly miss.
Though selfish, self-centered, self-seeking, and all that stuff, alcoholics and addicts can also improve the lives of those around us. So I ask Bluelight members this: What's the noblest thing you've done in the pursuit of drugs?
As I was cooking up a response to LiLc's post and reflecting upon some of the shameful things I have done, my mind kept wandering back to the days of living next door to a government projects designed exclusively for the elderly and the handicapped. For the addict, living next door to such a place is like living next door to a goldmine. Or winning the lottery. Or some other cliche that suggests a "land of plenty."
During the 5 years I lived next door to the projects, I became very good friends with some very desperate people. The government had pretty much warehoused them, and though it kept them alive, it kept them in poverty (you lose benefits if your life improves). I'd give elderly women rides to the food bank, I took leftover food over after Thanksgiving and other holidays, I kept an eye on people's grandkids while they went to buy lottery tickets and cigarettes, I spent hours and hours talking with a paraplegic dying of loneliness. I did all sorts of things that normal people who are members of normal communities do, but there was the underlying fact it was motivated in part and at first by addiction.
In the first year or so I was doing it primarily for the drug connections. "Need a lift to the food bank? No problem. I'll pick you up at 5. By the way can I get a couple of Opanas when we go?"Over time, however, I actually grew into being a member of the community, and I felt it my duty to help those in need however I could. Drug connections and cheap prices on pills were just additional benefits.
Providing company to the aforementioned paraplegic was probably the noblest thing I ever did for drugs. Tony was an amazing guy but he was hard to look at due to his injuries and deformities, which contributed to his loneliness. We'd spend hours putting together conspiracy theories, apocalypse predictions, imagining the atrocities we'd commit against our enemies, tearing apart computers and sometimes rebuilding them, watching movies he'd illegally downloaded, and chatting up various passersby in the neighborhood. I like to think that my company gave him a little light in his life, and that perhaps he lived as long as he did because I my own drug habit kept him from his habit's full potential. Sadly, and after the last time I saw him, he was dead within hours. One of the few people from a semi-sordid past whom I truly miss.
Though selfish, self-centered, self-seeking, and all that stuff, alcoholics and addicts can also improve the lives of those around us. So I ask Bluelight members this: What's the noblest thing you've done in the pursuit of drugs?
![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
