Originally posted by base615:
Not having a go here, just interested to know but why don't you plan to try these when you do plan to try things like PCP (and with a reasonably extensive list of drugs already tried)? Like I say, just interested to know.
Re: My decision to avoid LSD and MDMA.
I have made personal decisions to draw lines and limits in the past, and I put coke, meth, and injecting on the off-limits side. Now I'm doing coke every other day and meth at least once a week. Injecting I haven't yet tried, but for some reason I haven't ruled it out for H or K, although I'm really thinking that I shouldn't go that route.
The reason I'm not going to try MDMA is that I have been diagnosed with depression and take a bunch of meds for it. These meds don't really interact with uppers and downers, just psychedelics. For me, a coke comedown isn't *depressing* in that I can deal with it without getting bummed the next day or anything. It feels like a physical thing mostly. From what I hear about MDMA, I believe it would be especially enlightening for me and I don't want to deal with a craving that I foresee myself developing. I have a friend who went through 9 months of depression after rolling once. I know it sounds really strange that I do coke and think I'd get hooked harder on E, but that's just a limit I've put out there for myself in the interest of my mental health.
LSD scares me because of what I've read about how it can zap your short-term memory and leave you in some hole you don't think you'll ever leave. A friend (who introduced me to coke, actually) sold it for a couple years and did his share with (he claims) 450 trips over the course of 2 years and tells me never to try it because I'd like it too much and think I found some kind of higher truth that I will take seriously enough to apply to my life outside of drugs.
Basicly, I like uppers, downers, and opiates because of the predictability. They're not mind-expanding like psychedelics, but that's not what I'm after at this point in my life. I've never had a bad trip on mushrooms, but after a traumatic experience with someone else flipping out (and I got thrown in jail), I'm staying away. I don't smoke weed because I get down on myself and depressed when I'm coming down. This is more unpleasant to me than the extreme paranoia I've had on meth crashes. I just don't like drugs that make me feel stupid.
I would like to try PCP because of how much I liked DXM for so long. I've only done ketamine once and I was crashing hard on coke at the time, but it felt wonderfully comforting to lie there and watch the closed-eye visuals and know that my "trips" were only in my head. As long as I'm with someone I trust (and even someone that could hold me down if I were to freak out by some chance) and can't go do stupid things on the dissociatives.
*breath*...
Yeah, I've had a bit of adderal today and I'm extremely verbose, but I hope you made it through the whole thing.
