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What is the right thing to do?

dopemaster

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Mar 10, 2013
Messages
6,376
Location
Wherever I Lay My Head
So here is the thing an ex gf of mine started dating my friend. I have moved on and I have no romantic feelings towards her at all and I wouldn't even want to shag her.

Anyways my friend is a serious piece of shit, he just doesn't fuck me over.

So he is taking advantage of her doing things like stealing and worse. He had told me he is pretty much just using her. She is about to do him a serious favor or at least was.

So anyways she is calling me asking whether or not he will get clean and they will get married or something like that. I know he is gonna get this chick in serious trouble but she is in love with him.

I know he doesn't want her and doesn't really even like to have aex with her. I also know he stole alot from her abd pinned it on his sister who is also an ex of mine, but that is kinda irrelevant.

Really I hate all these people for the most part including my friend. We used to be good friends but I don't even trust this dude myself despite his attempts to make ammends with me.

So let me get to the point. This chick is calling me asking a shitload of questions. I could save her alot of heartbreak, money, and probably jail time if I was to say something.

I kinda want a few things of mine back from her so thats why I haven't totally blown her off. She did kinda fuck me over but I kinda used her a lil but damn did she get me worse.

Still she has a kid and she is really fucking dumb socially. So yeah this guy is pretty heavy duty scum which most people can't keep in check. He knows better than to mess with me. I threw him down a flight of stairs once....

So she wants to know whether he is into her or not and ifnshe is bad in the sack. I don't really have it in me to be like "look learn how to suck a dick and takena shower."

She has really gone downhill fast and I know a relationship with this dude will eat her alive and make her probably suicidal if she actually loves him which I think she does.

I would be betraying my friend to point out shit that really is quite obvious to most everyone else. I told her I would like to stay out of it yet she persist with questions that I won't answer.

Should I just let this all go down? I really wouldn't ask but I am starting to question my ethics as these are people of quite extremes.

Normally in a situation like this it wouldn't concern me in the least but this is the type of dude who will steal your car, try to fuck your mom, and sell your clothes but he never did anything like that except come on to my mother and me once hence the staircase incident.
 
I'd tell the girl to get out of the relationship, your "friend" sounds like a real piece of work.
 
Your not betraying your 'friend' at all by pointing out the obvious to the girl (who you must have at one time felt something for) - as long as you don't make stuff up and tell her the truth then, as you have no real 'friendship' with the guy why do you care? Tell her that he is bad news, you don't have to get into personal details/specifics etc.

Get your stuff back from her, then walk away from both of these people.

Bear
 
I already did all that. I said he is a scumbag and she is like he is great when he is clean. He has never been clean in the 13 years I have known him. I did say he steals. The only thing I think she cares about is if he will keep seeing her which is a big untill he violates his probation or finds someone new. I don't want to tell her she is looking pretty bad these days and he thinks he can do better. Plus she is kind of a bitch sometimes especially when provoked.

Also I know she is gonna try to get me to pity fuck her and that shit ain't happening.

I told her that she should know better to mess with people like him and his family. I keep in contact with dude mainly because he still pays regular installments on a debt with interest to me.

He "borrowed" her car the other day while she was sleeping and stole her stash which sounded like it was about 150 dollars worth. He then blamed on his sister and bounced woth his brother without a word at his family's house just leaving her blindsided.

She was all like "do you think it was him or his sister" and I say "fuck if I know, they all steal, why do you go there, its fucking filthy?" She then asked if I had heard from him today and I didn't tell her that he called me.

I'm pretty sure that it was him because he tried to sell me some of the same things she was missing. Plus he was the person who bounced when shit went missing.

I know he will still call her because he needs this huge favor. I don't know how saying "I don't think you two will have a romantic future" fails to drive anything in.

She asked me to elaborate and so I say I would rather not be in the middle because you will just tell him everything I said but yo I don't really need to elaborate because I am his only friend and he talks to me.

She is like what does that mean. I am thinking "wtf do you think I am trying to politely say."

I don't want to tell her that he finds her unattractive and she is kinda getting fat and strung out. She is also fucking sensitive so I think she will take this inevitable rejection personally or even worse think that I am trying to get with her.

I basically was like look its not gonna work out, trust me.

I am not really trying to give her something to cry about for months. They have been dating for a couple weeks and he goes in her purse and takes her car out for some dope and she is all worried about where he is 12 hours later after leaving his own home without saying a word.

I knew where he was but if I told her she might have been dumb enough to go there and endanger herself.

This woman is acting fucking retarded. Darwin?
 
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Sounds like a bunch of low lifes doing low life junkie shit. If you really hate all of these people like you say you do, then don't be bothered by it.
 
I think I will just stay out if it.

I can probably get ny stuff back if I talk to this chick a lil and have to take another call when she has questions.

Then she will probably want to talk face to face but she gonna have to give me my belongings. I don't even know why she would keep shit useless to her except to hold it hostage.
 
IMO, neither of them sound like people you want to be around to be associated with.... Remember the saying, "lay down with dogs, get up with fleas" or "you are judged by the company you keep"... Well both of those apply to this situation. I think you should stay out of the situation and the relationship. Just straight up tell her you want your belongings back (in a nice way) & state you will be over to pick them up on a specific day & time...then get your stuff and cut ties with both of them. She isn't going to listen to anything you say about him or their relationship, she's just looking for pity & for someone to talk to -- maybe she wants out of the relationship & thinks if she talks to you enough then you'll feel bad for her & she can score with you so he will leave her? I don't think the guy is a real "friend" because a true friend wouldn't do what he does. He's a little boy, not a man & it shows by how he treats his friends & S/O. I think it would be best for you to stay out of it so that way neither of them can blame you.
 
Yeah that is pretty spot on because I don't live like those people, they just have my phone number.

I dated that woman I really long time ago. I guess I feel bad her kid has contact with or even worse this man as a father figure. I suppose the longevity I have known this woman and seeing her kid grow up yearning for a father figure play a huge part in my thought process.

As far as getting my shit back this bitch has my computer cords and her mom fixes computers but never fixed mine cuz this bitch never got her to.

When I went to get them they were misplaced and now they were thrown out cuz they were garbage when in reality this shit is almost 200 bucks.

I really don't have the money or even a working computer so I would really like my cords which she just admitted to having. But its like she wants info for shit she stole from me.

I know this woman and she would fucking quote me no matter what I say or conviently lose reception if I said I was coming to pick my shit up followed by a text "I don't know where your stupid worthless cords are cuz you are a shitty friend and I can't find them. "

Maybe its time to cut my losses but damn I am not exactly above the poverty line so no cords means no computer.

If I agree to meet and tell her she will give me my shit. She won't be able to resist insider info. The guy she is dating still thinks I am his best friend in the world even though I won't let him in my house.

I am considering just kinda bullshitting my way to my property if just being nice to her does not work.

I get online with my phone.
 
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Well, if I were you, I'd just cut my ties with them, once and for all.

Just have one final conversation and be done with it.
 
$200 for computer cords? Christ, what are they made out of gold?

Fuck if I know. My father paid about 4k for a computer and got online with no antivirus.

He was about to give it to goodwill so I said I would take it and fix it.

Everyone is right about cutting ties which I had for years.

I am going to call her after this calms down and ask her to meet me with the cords even if it means I have to take her to Starbucks. (Shudders)
 
Start answering the girl's questions and telling her the truth but tell your "friend" you plan on doing so first.
 
Its done and over with.

I can't go into details as it could seriously blow any degree of anonymity I have here.

I did get most my stuff back and I didn't hurt anyones feelings or fuck up their lives.

I think things worked out for the best.

The whole thing was like watching a train wreck.
 
walk away from them both and dont look back

A billion times this.

Do not keep people like that in your life. They will destroy any chance that you will ever have at being happy. It's not worth the time or the emotional turmoil to try and fix anything about that relationship, as it's obvious that they are either going to destroy all three of you, or destroy each other. Let them figure their own shit out on their own.
 
I don't give a shit about them. My primary concern was for her child who I had grown attached to her child. I had given up rights to my only known children.

I cut people loose all the time as it is a necessity and can become one on an instant.

I suppose my only bad habit with people is collecting debts. This debt by my "friend" was incurred without my authorization. I suppose if I subtract interest he doesn't really owe but the interest is over the initial debt.

I really ain't about that type of thing anymore but its hard not to collect owed money.
 
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