My anti-theological beliefs do not bar me from feeling all things spiritual. The "spiritual" activity of my heart and soul are related to the life I live.
I am physically present, part and party of the great whole, as are you. I cannot explain my heart or reason but the answer to these questions will come out of the same flesh as I am made of.
I may think very odd things but there is an ongoing battle to stop believing nonsense. They are pages in a book and the words are not something to cling on to.
Keep the book shut, fight against religious thoughts, and this robs you of a great comfort in your life.
When the page is free to turn in the wind, the spirit is lifted, but it is not a spirit wind.
It is shameful, whoever tried to sell you your own thoughts. I will not lie to you. Tell your prayers to your hands and never let anyone, even yourself, label them as something.
Atheism is indistinct, free of rules. There is no goal, no tithe, no punishment, no priest. You let all that go, because you know things are wrong in the beliefs and there is no emptiness from losing them. The one making the claim is asking an atheist to believe and an atheist is not.