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Wedding etiquette

Cheap presents are a polite way of saying: I hate you, i dont want to be at your crappy wedding but im a sucker for free booze
 
Put On A Weading, I'll Get My Trowel!

^
Or,
perhaps,
I spent all my money on booze,
here's somethink
cheap
to make up an 8th of what I'm
about to
consume.

I've heard.

From me.

:)
 
Anyone posting in this thread, feel free to make me a bridesmaid, I could do with a new dress %)
 
vanth said:
Anyone posting in this thread, feel free to make me a bridesmaid, I could do with a new dress %)
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I want to be a bridesmaid but Im not real keen on the dress idea...........If I ever get asked, you can have mine ok.
 
im anti gift registries.

this issue arose when we received a wedding invite this week; and inside was a registry card and list from Myer. the lowest items on the list began at $70 and increased to as high as $1200 (which is absurd in my book). i thought a gift was just that; and a personal gesture of recognition? this "new" tradition just doesnt sit right with me.

...kytnism...:|
 
vanth said:
Anyone posting in this thread, feel free to make me a bridesmaid, I could do with a new dress %)
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I'da made you a bridesmaid vanth, you do sound like a very good sport about the costs! =D

(despite what I said I'm kinda miffed no-one's ever asked me... even my own sister :( )
 
kytnism said:
im anti gift registries.

this issue arose when we received a wedding invite this week; and inside was a registry card and list from Myer. the lowest items on the list began at $70 and increased to as high as $1200 (which is absurd in my book). i thought a gift was just that; and a personal gesture of recognition? this "new" tradition just doesnt sit right with me.

...kytnism...:|
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i agree with you. but at the same time i can see the usefulness as a way to avoid duplicating gifts- eg when my friend got married they received 12 platters/trays- there were only 25 guests at the wedding! And then she had the dilemma of trying to work out who would be least offended if she returned it! I am also in two minds about couples that ask for money- while yes it means u can contribute as much or you can afford, or hardly any if you so choose, I always get a weird vibe when i get the invite and it says to contribute to the new fridge or whatever!

I am glad there is no wedding on the horizon for me so those kind of dilemmas don't have to worry me
 
I'm also an anti-registry person, with anything. My dad's ex girlfriend is Dutch, and they are really big on sending out 'wish list'. She asked me to send through my birthday wishlist and was baffled when i said i didn't have one, and that any present I got would be wonderful. :\
 
Well I absolutely love the idea of registries and especially money donations - if they're 'towards' something, like a honeymoon or renovations etc.

Personal gifts are all well and good but that's really about YOU and what YOU want to give; it's rarely about what the couple would like to recieve. I want the satisfaction of knowing my money was well spent on something the couple both needed and wanted, and if that's a honeymoon because they've been living together for 6 years and already have every nick-nack and white good under the sun, then so be it :) They're happy - I'm happy.

But I think the registry debate can get pretty out of hand ... you should see the catfights on the bridal forums!
 
I don't mind a wishing well - especially if, like SLM said, the couple have been living together for years, and i do see the point of a registry; it would be frustrating getting 3 of the same thing and 5 toasters. ;)

However, it can be a slightly embarassing for some people who may not be very financial to be faced with registry gifts starting at $100 or so dollars... We had a wishing well at our wedding, and some people brought a small gift - we didn't expect anything really, it was just an option.

I just feel it could be awkward for people who may not have alot of money to spend, and are faced with a registry- if all the less expensive gifts are taken, i wouldn't want my friends to be really out of pocket because they feel obligated to buy me something. :(

It was my choice to get married, my choice to invite them to share in my day, i don't want anyone put out because of something i've chosen to do. :)
 
Its just that the gifts are all so boring. I dont want to buy one of my best mates a set of towels or luggage or something. If there was some fat trance cd's on the list it would be good! ;)

Eh, I'll see how it pans out, there may be alterations and additions to the list as time goes on. Its not for a couple of months really. :)

:D
 
A bloody registry of gifts?

I thought that idea was a joke when i first heard of it.

I think anyone who dares to give me some list and expect me to buy from that list can go and take a running jump.

I would be extremely offended.

And whats more if someone did that to me then they would not be getting a gift either.
 
samadhi said:
I don't mind a wishing well - especially if, like SLM said, the couple have been living together for years, and i do see the point of a registry; it would be frustrating getting 3 of the same thing and 5 toasters. ;)

However, it can be a slightly embarassing for some people who may not be very financial to be faced with registry gifts starting at $100 or so dollars... We had a wishing well at our wedding, and some people brought a small gift - we didn't expect anything really, it was just an option.

I just feel it could be awkward for people who may not have alot of money to spend, and are faced with a registry- if all the less expensive gifts are taken, i wouldn't want my friends to be really out of pocket because they feel obligated to buy me something. :(

It was my choice to get married, my choice to invite them to share in my day, i don't want anyone put out because of something i've chosen to do. :)
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I agree with you, I actually like wishing wells (or 'tangible money registries', like honeymoons) much more than set dollar-amount gift registries. We had some people put $20 on our honeymoon registry, which was absolutely fine with me!

I find it really awkward too when the only thing I can afford off someone's registry is a set of Sheridan facewashers. Oh goodie! That's a gift to remember me by! :D I'd rather have given them the cash.

But I'm still happier with a gift registry than no suggestions at all ... maybe I am just shocking at thinking of good gifts. =D
 
MazDan said:
A bloody registry of gifts?

I thought that idea was a joke when i first heard of it.

I think anyone who dares to give me some list and expect me to buy from that list can go and take a running jump.

I would be extremely offended.

And whats more if someone did that to me then they would not be getting a gift either.
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LOL.... good luck finding a wedding these days where the couple doesn't give any indication at all as far as gift suggestions. :D It's practically a faux pas not to. People are all lost at sea, it's like sending an invite without dress code.
 
Really??

Well it still doesnt change how I feel.............honestly I consider it offensive.

I always put a lot of thought into gifts and will continue to do so............. There is a lot of stuff about this new world that just sucks balls and thats one of them.
 
MazDan said:
I want to be a bridesmaid but Im not real keen on the dress idea...........If I ever get asked, you can have mine ok.
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I'm getting married next year...I've already picked my bridesmaids but if someone drops out you can be a bridesman Maz. You'll have to wear a dress though but I'm happy to pay.
 
Doofqueen, I think it's pretty normal to ask bridemaids to pay for their own dresses. It's just sad this crazy wedding industry has got to the point where things are so expensive it can really be a strain for people. A friend of mine is getting married soon who I am a bridemaid for, and we are splitting the cost of the dress ($150 each). At my own wedding I'm planning to pay for all of the bridesmaids stuff (dress, hair, shoes etc) but might just do our own makeup. I really want my friends to enjoy the day with me. I feel that they're doing me a real favour by giving up their time to be there, and I don't want there to be any chance of them feeling resentful or stressed about money. I don't have heaps of money but I can afford it and it's a priority for me. Having said that I feel fine about paying for my friend's wedding - I know her wedding is really causing a financial strain, so it really comes down to what you can afford. Your friend might be happy to pay for some of it if you can't afford it.
 
yellowfrog said:
I'm getting married next year...I've already picked my bridesmaids but if someone drops out you can be a bridesman Maz. You'll have to wear a dress though but I'm happy to pay.
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woohoo, but I still want to be called a bridesmaid. lol.
 
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