Mental Health Wanting to Avoid Opioid Addiction From Prescription--Not Sure How Much is Safe

[AlphaMethylPhenyl]

So, I am having surgery soon.

I was given 5mg hydrocodone pills to take as needed for pain.

I've taken them the last five days, 15mg per day in divided doses. That's three per day.

But one time I accidentally took three of them at once because I was drunk and had horrible short term memory as I didn't have caffeine that day too. Seriously, by accident. If you know me, you know I hate opiates because I was addicted to them before (by prescription). The feeling is just too good. I'm not drinking again.

I don't get high per se, but there's definitely a mood lift for 2-3 hours followed by a crash which I would describe as worse than that of amphetamine. I do have pain, but I also get feeling good. Over the counter meds don't quite cut it. I'm kind of scared.

Am I in the danger zone? Should I not take any more until after my surgery? How long would it take for me to become psychologically/physically dependent? I can keep it to three per day (sometimes I take two).

I'm also prescribed clonazepam.

I've made so much headway in my mental health recently that I don't want to risk backtracking.

Just ask for any other information. Thanks.

 

[Nicholai]

Dosing with that regimen....honestly, I would probably think it would take MONTHS for you to get physically addicted....

 

[endotropic]

How do you feel when you wake up, or whenever the longest period between doses is? How do you feel if you skip a dose? That should give you a good indication of where you stand right now.

 

[AlphaMethylPhenyl]

I feel kind of puffy and a bit sick, say 2/10 at its worst when I wake up. A slight feeling of stiffness and muscle tension, a tad bit of a runny nose. Teary eyes and yawning, but that goes away after about 20 minutes--I don't sleep well, so it could be because of that. Some hotness. It's hard to distinguish from alcohol withdrawal, though. I've been drinking 1-2 beers every night since three years ago with very few breaks and I stopped recently. And I'm addicted to caffeine so that may be it right when I wake up, too. I smoke 20 cigarettes/day.

I haven't taken any today to test the waters. I feel a bit flat and tired, nothing that bad. I do crave it a bit. My girlfriend lashed out at me and I was able to not fight with her. Depression is a normal part of my life--but I do get these dips when it wears off. They're there, but not too significant. At least not yet.

I was also given 5mg morphine tabs from the back surgeon who inspected me. Since I ran out of the other narcotic, I have to take those if I want relief.

I will take a maximum of one today and see how I sleep and what happens when I wake. What do you think?

 

[Rybee]

For me I think it's quite important to distinguish the psychological element of addiction, and the physiological element of dependence.

I've been physiologically dependant on drugs such as Effexor (Venlafaxine), Lyrica (Pregabalin), Prozac (Fluoxetine). I'd suffer horrible withdrawal symptoms if I missed my dose, but I was never 'addicted' to them.

Then on the other hand I've been psychologically addicted to a whole range of Benzodiazepines. I'd crave them, constantly think about them, do stupid things to get them, wrongly prioritise them as more important than other aspects of my life etc... But I wouldn't necessarily get withdrawal symptoms if I didn't have them.

And somewhere in the middle of the two was my relationship with Opiates. I'm both psychologically addicted to them, and physiologically dependent on them. As with the Benzodiazepines, I crave them, constantly think about them, do stupid things to get them, wrongly prioritise them as more important than other aspects of my life... but worse still, I do suffer horrible withdrawal symptoms if I don't take them.

I think it's important to stick to a regime, (whether one you've drawn up yourself, or as directed by your doctor) and stick to that regime, you'll be fine. You may build a tolerance, you may become physiologically dependant on them... but it's generally not a problem. You can increase your dose to help with the tolerance issues, or you can taper off slowly to help with the dependence issues.

However, the dangerous point and the moment in which you should really question yourself, is the moment in which you start drifting from your routine for illegitimate reasons, for cravings, for fun, for that 'little something extra'. It's that moment in which you cross the line from being a drug user to a drug abuser. It's that moment in which you need to take a step back and evaluate what you're doing and why you're doing it. It's that moment in which use becomes abuse.

Be aware of that moment, and be open and honest with yourself. Other than that, you have nothing to fear. I've been in your shoes before and the best thing you can do is physically write down your medication regime and stick to it. Once you start seeing the signs that you're drifting from it, don't be afraid to reach out for help. Just be honest with yourself, it's okay. You're only human

 

[AlphaMethylPhenyl]

I've been dependent on antidepressants too, as well as other pharmaceuticals and drugs. Thankfully it's been quite a while.

Thanks for the lengthy response!

I've limited myself to a couple per day.

I will update in a few days/weeks.