jeebus13
Bluelighter
All around are the clues.
Everyone says it's crazy,
but when you feel it
even you can't tell that lie to yourself.
The bright lights
of a too-small city
are more blinding than I had imagined
and occasionally
the lights come from the sky...
Not possible?
Or maybe too possible.
Dying seems less dramatic
when viewed from the inside...
and when you return
everything seems brighter.
Terror and another night without sleep-
the only gifts they have given me.
I feel despotic
treading on such unfamiliar ground
as the truth.
It never sounds as real
when it comes from the endless clicking
of a keyboard.
Maybe it's less dangerous
with the lights on...
better not to tempt fate again.
Maybe they'll sing to me again,
though they haven't done that since I was twelve.
Now it's all silence
and unspoken questions... but sometimes they answer...
in their own way...
just like me...
in my own way.
I can't decide whether to thank them
or to curse them-
either way seems petty and insufficient.
I guess that's the conundrum
of being another crazy
typing out his irrelevant rants
at a screen that never answers.
Maybe this time
I'll wake up
and it'll all be the same-
except for me.
Everyone says it's crazy,
but when you feel it
even you can't tell that lie to yourself.
The bright lights
of a too-small city
are more blinding than I had imagined
and occasionally
the lights come from the sky...
Not possible?
Or maybe too possible.
Dying seems less dramatic
when viewed from the inside...
and when you return
everything seems brighter.
Terror and another night without sleep-
the only gifts they have given me.
I feel despotic
treading on such unfamiliar ground
as the truth.
It never sounds as real
when it comes from the endless clicking
of a keyboard.
Maybe it's less dangerous
with the lights on...
better not to tempt fate again.
Maybe they'll sing to me again,
though they haven't done that since I was twelve.
Now it's all silence
and unspoken questions... but sometimes they answer...
in their own way...
just like me...
in my own way.
I can't decide whether to thank them
or to curse them-
either way seems petty and insufficient.
I guess that's the conundrum
of being another crazy
typing out his irrelevant rants
at a screen that never answers.
Maybe this time
I'll wake up
and it'll all be the same-
except for me.
