Two poems titaled 'Maverick'

[drug_wench]

written for my horse.......wud b curious to know which is preferred in general....

MAVERICK #1
His eyes hold fire
But pray for peace
Just feel his coat
You'll find release
His breath is sweet
A fragile bird
His ears flick round
At sounds he's heard
I share his trust
A bond I treasure
Always riding him
Is pleasure
He jumps the moon
If you should ask
Always faithful
Likes a task
Like a child who's
Raised by me
He knows I love him
Ceaselessly


MAVERICK #2
Lone star riding
Freedom's ghost
To chase the moon's
What he wants most
Space-age traveller
Coast to coast
Leonine mane
He shakes to boast

Proud and staunch
His beauty true
Captivating
All of you
Just climb aboard
He wants you to
So light of feather
Gleaming blue

Magic spring
A glowing ride
Now you know
You've learnt to glide
You'll never run
You'll never hide
When he's the horse
That you're astride

 

[yakksoho]

I enjoy the descriptive ethereal language you use in both of these "gleaming blue" and the allusion to animals (lion, horse, birds). The first paints a portrait and the second tells a story. The short sentences make them exciting while the phrasing makes them peaceful. They are both beautiful.

 

[drug_wench]

thank you! i am glad they were successful, i used as colourful imagery as i cud, glad to read sum positive feedback already :D

 

[Raz]

There are bits and pieces of them both that I like equally...if I had to choose one, I'd say I prefer the second; I like the way the verses are broken up.