Too many meds, No Sex!

[Flutterbye22]

I am just wondering if anyone else is going through or has gone through this same problem? My husband and I have been together for 20 years total, and I am disabled with chronic pain and he was diagnosed with congestive heart failure, A Fib and diabetes. I love my husband dearly and have never cheated and I know the same goes for him. Problem is when he was diagnosed w/all this he started on approx. 15 medications and basically the sex stopped 15-16 years ago. He never ever wants to talk about it except to say "its the medications" I can understand that but I to at one time or another have been on medications that pretty much killed my sex drive but it always came back eventually. Before this all happened we had a fandamntastic sex life!!
I even went as far ( 8 yes ago) as to lie to him and tell him he had a routine doctors appointment and me being on disability he thought nothing of me going along. So when we both spoke with the doctor I carefully and respectfully brought up our dilemma. The doctor put him on one of those E.D. medications and I thought OK maybe things will turn around here! One day about a month later found the medications in the cabinet unopened and never touched. You can only imagine the thoughts that went through my head!! ( he doesn't love me, I'm too ugly, ect., ect.) We'll I may never win a beauty contest but everyone especially men hit on me constantly! A lot of them younger than my own two boys! As women go I'm extremely easy going, 99% of the time in a good mood, on and on...I don't want to push him but this is seriously getting on my last nerve!! And yes I have still stayed 100% faithful to him to this day!
Has anyone gone through this and does anyone have some serious suggestions?!? I think I may be a virgin again! LOL!! Thanx for you alls time!

 

[gmlifer]

Sounds like you have attempted to talk to him but have you stressed your need for sex? Would he have a problem with you going outside the marriage for sex? Is that against your religion?

Ultimately it's up to you. Can you continue to live this way?

 

[BeachBum4u]

You really need to have a serious sit down with him and explain how dire this situation is - to/for you. No attacks but use words like, when you do this it makes me feel like "fill in the blank". He needs to understand how bad things are for you right now and how bad they are making you feel.

There are meds out there that can help his situation, like testosterone (it helped me many moons ago because pain meds do mess with men's hormone levels). Maybe the ED meds he was given before could also be of assistance. However, the biggest thing is for him to truly appreciate your feelings while you also recognize all he's dealing with. I wish you both all the best!

 

[pofacedhoe]

bisopralol? or any one of those beta agonists that they give for atrial fibrilation

go to some kind of couples therapy with him