Tonight.

[KurtAurelius]

Tonight we gloss the thumbnails of videos,

Free domain to help advise those many lost,

Another way instead to find food for the inner critic,

To take a title of a concept and apply it to mean the entire reason you see yourself as a failure.

What to do when the fun runs out?

You spent so long indulging yourself for no other means than escape?

I’m not escaping death, merely sensations,

Cover the unpleasant sensations with good ones, determine each slither of the day.

Nothing to feel sorry for, understanding no more blame, but still witnessing the disjointed and angry ego.

Who do you want to be? I know I’ll be who I feel like. I’ll pretend harmoniously to be a fake epicurean, like those who misunderstand the man and take the word for its own meaning.

Just like how I intake this reality, to see it as a discomfort.

To continue being selfish to bog myself down in my feelings.

Every failure has been an opportunity, and each time I feel bad, it’s only due to letting a critic win.

I don’t want to be me, unless it feels good.
I don’t want to die, just because there’s one more thing to think of.
I don’t want to live, for the effort I perceive it to be.

We had gotten past the point of a singularity, for determining reality for one pleasant sensation or concept, but I let myself do it anyhow.

Lest here I can speak to myself, and understand there is no explanation, no answer, and no single truth, to any of this.

Best calls to defend a organic mass, and a mind crafted to let loose.

I can choose naught, but I’ll choose to atleast say this, that I understand the choices I made, and that any I have left, are mine to make for however I wish to go forward. Pain can be mine if I want it so.

 

[Mushoku_Sensei]

Not sure whether you intended to get comments, but...
Usually my nights turn into: Why didn't I just sleep when I could?

I relate to the depressing elements and the attempt to manipulate one's emotions according to wish... Wish it still worked though.
And while I try to make sense I already know I'll regret it tomorrow.

 

[streaM Freak]

I didn't know whether to comment or not, or like vs heart honesty too, because it feels so deep but my emotions are sort of shallow, I have to say here. Sounds weird to say out loud, but I just want you to know why I don't know what to say.

The world needs more people like you honestly. Don't let the world's chaos change you too much. Always try to remember the things that make you who you are, even if society or whoever makes them feel like they are not good things.

And also, people change over time, so please try not to judge yourself too harshly. The majority of people meander through life with their heads in the cloud so you're already many steps ahead.. which comes with the price of an early midlife realization

 

[Ki3ly]

Self- love isn't spa days and sending candles. It is doing the uncomfortable stuff that future you will thank you for. You won't heal by thinking about healing.

You heal when you stop performing, start feeling, and let the truth be messy for a while. You don't find your worth in other people. You build it every time you

stop shrinking yourself just to be liked.


We don't need closure from someone else. We need it from ourselves. Stop rereading the last chapter, trying to make sense out of it, and move on

to the next one.


And most of the time it's not anxiety, you are just dehydrated, scrolling too much, and haven't seen the sun in three days. Go outside, touch the grass,

drink some water, then come back and face your stuff. There you go.