time out

[mr_fluffy]

how are you?
such an easy question to ask,
the words just roll off the tongue.
how are you?
such an easy question to answer,
whith a glib 'fine, and yourself?'
or a 'not so bad, but getting there.'

and yet the answer is not so simple
and not so glib.
how am i?
tired, drained, afraid and uncertain.
how am i?
scared.
so many of my friends are crumbling
and for once i'm not worried about them
but i am trully afraid for them.

and yet, why do i care so much
i have my own worries
my own issues.
i struggle through each day
against that which i crave,
knowing it is bad for me.
why worry about others?
charity begins at home.

finally, my life is good
i have someone that loves me
and who i love very much.
someone special, someone i dreamed about
a dream i expected to remain unfulfilled.
and yet, daily i am drawn back to the past
daily i wish to return to what was
hey, at least i knew i was fucked up
and that i had nothing worthwile to offer.
now it's up to me to deliver.

how am i?
i'm struggling
dealing with it day to day
and ultimately i slip far too often.
but it's my self-respect, my self-belief
and my love for you that get me through.
and as much as i try to hide it
people know i'm not fine
but hopefully they can see i'm dealing with it
if not always coping.

i need some 'me' time
i need a break
i can barely deal with myself
right now you're too much.
please don't think me bad
or imagine me selfish
'cos i will be back.
i only hope you'll still be here.
by the time i return.

 

[plazma]

<=>=

I understand those feelings oh so well man.

Beautiful words.

-plaz out-

 

[bisKi]

it's only natural one needs some time to oneself, and the friends who really do matter, will still be there when you return. xoxoxo //j

 

[PsychoKitten]

Much love and beautiful as always.

I hope you get your time out and your beautiful ending, those that care will always be waiting for your return. Enjoy the journey and don't be gone too long