dragonfog019
Bluelighter
my first post in this forum - please be gentle.
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"thoughts on a withering life"
time
measured in
skittles eaten
and
ciggarettes smoked.
"it's all going so fast!" she whispered,
blue eyes wide and innocent.
and the grungy man is still there,
alone on the field
yelling at the sky -
"Always go right! Always go right!
And by that I mean
- slightly to the left."
but it doesn't listen.
and the world is rushing out of control
things seem to be going quite sideways
tumbling along, tighten your jaw
lash out at the melting shadows
"where are we? where are we?
we're dying, dying, all of us dying."
her dark hair blowing in the wind,
a curious smile on her face.
because none of us know what we're doing,
no matter how hard we pretend.
"everything seemed so right. perfect.
and yet everything was wrong.
and it scared me.
- really scared me."
he feels it too
- the imminent madness.
and i'm walkng along with you,
explaining how everything is so much better now.
so clear.
how i've understood what it means to be alive.
all the while, i'm running desperately from reality.
but it's always close on my heels.
one can only keep running for so long...
tears the next night as i come crashing back down.
fears, too - what am i doing?
am i really smart enough, strong enough, to stay in control?
i'd like to think so - but then why do i feel like this?
all this rationalizing - it can't be right.
images of a broken future loom large in my mind
- "she was so promising.
so lucky.
why did she throw it all away?"
so why do i keep going forward?
well, perhaps it's because i can't go back.
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sometimes i feel like everything is perfect. this is the best time of my life so far. i can understand why things are the way they are.
but then this worry creeps in. i can't go on this way. but if the alternative is going back to the way things were - well, i can't even consider that. "how foolish these mortals be" - we never recognize a good thing. of course, sometimes idiocy amuses in masquerading as happiness, making fools of us all.
------------------
~po
"she said it's so funny how life burns out so fast, it's just another wasted day."
--------------------------------------
"thoughts on a withering life"
time
measured in
skittles eaten
and
ciggarettes smoked.
"it's all going so fast!" she whispered,
blue eyes wide and innocent.
and the grungy man is still there,
alone on the field
yelling at the sky -
"Always go right! Always go right!
And by that I mean
- slightly to the left."
but it doesn't listen.
and the world is rushing out of control
things seem to be going quite sideways
tumbling along, tighten your jaw
lash out at the melting shadows
"where are we? where are we?
we're dying, dying, all of us dying."
her dark hair blowing in the wind,
a curious smile on her face.
because none of us know what we're doing,
no matter how hard we pretend.
"everything seemed so right. perfect.
and yet everything was wrong.
and it scared me.
- really scared me."
he feels it too
- the imminent madness.
and i'm walkng along with you,
explaining how everything is so much better now.
so clear.
how i've understood what it means to be alive.
all the while, i'm running desperately from reality.
but it's always close on my heels.
one can only keep running for so long...
tears the next night as i come crashing back down.
fears, too - what am i doing?
am i really smart enough, strong enough, to stay in control?
i'd like to think so - but then why do i feel like this?
all this rationalizing - it can't be right.
images of a broken future loom large in my mind
- "she was so promising.
so lucky.
why did she throw it all away?"
so why do i keep going forward?
well, perhaps it's because i can't go back.
------------------------------------
sometimes i feel like everything is perfect. this is the best time of my life so far. i can understand why things are the way they are.
but then this worry creeps in. i can't go on this way. but if the alternative is going back to the way things were - well, i can't even consider that. "how foolish these mortals be" - we never recognize a good thing. of course, sometimes idiocy amuses in masquerading as happiness, making fools of us all.
------------------
~po
"she said it's so funny how life burns out so fast, it's just another wasted day."
