This tug of life, a scar

[EllaDesbals]

I am not fragility;
I am more than you think.

I am more than I think;
this room cannot hold me

with its bright eye above us
and the silence that you give it.

You are only
traces of a man,

your house
a forest of bone.

You neglect to play me music now,
you drink but do not rage.

I am somehow inverted by this place,
an antithesis of your fear,

your undoing of time
with fingers once gentle,

now locked and trembling;
your mourning

for the scotch
now swallowed.

You with your frosted gaze,
you were never ready for this:

my appetite to be free
of your shady, autumn humanity.

If I stride out now
it will be in acceptance

of this tug of life,
a scar under your eyes.

 

[Dastrix Slogan]

I think this is damn good, theres a hollow feeling that echoes through this piece, reinforced by some clever imagery!

your house
a forest of bone.

 

[RareForm]

^agreed. this is fresh. it resonates in my mind, unconventional and original. i take my hat off to you.

 

[EllaDesbals]

Thank you both!

 

[(Wordy)]

*bump!*

 

[Raz]

Very eloquent...good bump, I missed this the first time around!

 

[(Wordy)]

Yeah me too!

 

[katmeow]

Me three!

Nice structure

 

[Amanita Mary]

This piece hit close. Ive been through having to see my love withdrawl, and the hurt of his memory loss... And more painful than that, having to look into the glazed eyes of someone who's just not there. I'll stop whining...nice work

"Your undoing of time
with fingers once gentle,

now locked and trembling;
your mourning

for the scotch
now swallowed.

You with your frosted gaze,
you were never ready for this:"

simply beautiful

 

[up all night]

I wish this person was still around and posting. Nice bump wordy.

 

[colicolo]

Agreed, excellent choice of bump material.
Wordy, you're an essential beat to the heart of words.
When i count my heroes, i count you thrice.