This time I said "no"

[ShelleBear]

This time I said “no”
Ive heard it all before.
I expected it, while at the same time thought no way.
Then I saw it, the flame…..
The look on your face…….
How you could have no restraint Ill never know.
As the flame heated the bowl, I felt as though my heart had a flame burning it.
I want to help you…….
But “you don’t need help.”
Rock bottom…..what does it feel like? I wonder…….
You had it all, why didn’t you realize it?
Had to chase the ultimate high……..just once.
A bowl of bullshit to me….just as your bowl makes that rock.
You got your rock, Ive got mine. One I wish I could use to knock some sense into you with.
Except mine will be used to put a wall up around my heart as I watch the you I know deteriorate.
The rain started as a light drizzle, and slowly its turning into a thunderstorm.
I see the winds picking up speed……almost a hurricane now.
“Try it” you said. The same words I heard almost a year ago while a white powder was laid out before me.
The first time I experienced addiction.
I said ok back then….hesitantly.
This time….I said “no”. You can lose yourself, and I will lose you in the process, but I will not lose myself.
I will remember you. The you that isn’t you anymore. Maybe the storm will go away and you’ll see yourself again…..
But the tornado is already lifting you up off the ground.
Have a nice flight, alone.
This time I said “no”.
This time I want to be alone.
Enjoy your crack.
The ultimate of highs.
Take your flight alone.
This time I said “no’.
Ill be alone….and pray that you will eventually land safely.
Goodbye.
This time I said “no”.
[This message has been edited by ShelleBear (edited 09 June 2001).]

 

[honEbee]

I'm sorry that your friend wasn't strong enough to stop. But, thankfully, you were. That's something you can be proud of. It's hard when you want to be strong for someone, but after a while you have to realize that its ultimately their decision anyway. So why drag yourself down with them?
Good luck. I hope your friend wises up.

 

[Mellabopper]

great work, girl

thats awesome that you said no to it - it takes a lot of courage to do that sometimes.

Mella

 

[cand-E bamber]

beautiful work, haunts me a bit of my own past too.. ive been there.. its hard, harder to let a friend fall like that.
------------------
Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too? - Douglas Adams

 

[LiQwidVibeZ]

Everybody was kung fu fighting daa da da...everyone sing along. Had to give this one a bump Im going through somewhat of a similiar situation but I think my friend is so completely lost in denial. I wish you and the muse for your writing the best of luck.
*Jessica*
~Screw you guys im going to the jungle room!~

 

[FunGuy]

you could make that an awesome song.