Thinking about getting on the meth program

[lozgod]

Just went through 2 days of opana withdrawal after a week long run of shooting up 5's IR. Looked on the narc converter and according to it, it stated that IV'ed oxymorphone is equivalent to 150mgs of oxycodone PO (oral). I couldn't believe it but after the last one about 8 hours later the withdrawal started and it was bad enough to say I will never touch Opana's again. I was throwing up and squirting for 14 hours straight. Took 80mgs of Valium to get me 3 hours of sleep after I stop vomiting. Got lucky and had a friend that needed money to get his script out so I pawned my $1100 plasma for $85 to get his script out and he gave me 25 15mg oxys. I took 10 of them and haven't felt shit but I ain't sick anymore.

I thought people were exaggerating opana withdrawals but I seriously was considering calling an ambulance. I was vomiting and dry heaving yellow disgusting something. I couldn't do anything but lay in the bed with a bucket next to me.

Anyway. I hate suboxone, and am thinking about methadone. I'm too much of a pussy to go through withdrawal and quit. I think I have some kind of endorphin deficiency because opiates made me feel normal for the first time ever in my life.

Has anyone seen methadone as a bad thing in their lives? Has it caused them to lose jobs or make their life worse than it was being a junkie? I can't go on like this, spending all of my money on pills and dope. I need to get back to being a normal productive person. I am talented, smart, and it is all going to waste being a junkie.

 

[Lolie]

I live in an area where a lot of people are on the methadone programme. For the majority, their lives revolve around their methadone in the same way they previously revolved around heroin or other opiates. There are definitely health and financial benefits to taking methadone alone, but it's not some magic bullet which can stop you from copping and using other opiates.

I think you need to be realistic about what you expect from the methadone programme and to remain aware that being a "normal productive person" is going to depend a great deal on how much you put into achieving that goal.

 

[Missykins]

I live in an area where a lot of people are on the methadone programme. For the majority, their lives revolve around their methadone in the same way they previously revolved around heroin or other opiates. There are definitely health and financial benefits to taking methadone alone, but it's not some magic bullet which can stop you from copping and using other opiates.

I think you need to be realistic about what you expect from the methadone programme and to remain aware that being a "normal productive person" is going to depend a great deal on how much you put into achieving that goal.

Agree. I don't know how someone can get to a methadone clinic each day and still go to school, have a job, etc. My employer would not be tolerant of a daily clinic visit, especially when you can't disclose and can only say "I can't be at work before 11:00 am every day."

OP, why do you hate Suboxone?

 

[oliphill]

If you wanna get off opiates entirely in the end I wouldn't recommend it, but if you feel you could stick to a maintenance script then go for it. I just could never stick to my script, I was using on top pretty much every day, it was an absolute nightmare and when I did finally get off it, it was 10x harder.

 

[Lolie]

Agree. I don't know how someone can get to a methadone clinic each day and still go to school, have a job, etc. My employer would not be tolerant of a daily clinic visit, especially when you can't disclose and can only say "I can't be at work before 11:00 am every day."

OP, why do you hate Suboxone?

A lot depends on how the programme's delivered in the OP's area. A large portion of people on methadone maintenance take their dose at their local pharmacy here which makes fitting it into your daily schedule relatively easy.

In some suburbs there are no pharmacies willing to service methadone clients so those people have to get their dose from a clinic (these are always located at hospitals) and that can involve a fair bit of time on public transport in addition to waiting your turn.

 

[User Name Here]

It sounds like methadone maintenance would be better than what you're currently doing (you pawned an $1,100 TV for $85 in order to get a few pills?!?!) but like someone said earlier, if you want to quit entirely, you need to consider a number of other options in addition to methadone (which seems to be hard for most people to quit entirely).

 

[lozgod]

I got a loan on the TV I didn't sell it. I'll get it out with my unemployment check tomorrow.

You can go to the meth clinic around here starting 5a.m. so it should be able to fit in the schedule.

As far as Suboxone I tried it buying it off the street, I used it for about 2 months and after 3 weeks of "the miracle" I lost all my ambition, sex drive, etc. Iy was like I was a zombie. I don't think our brains are made to function on Partial agonists.

I should just suck it up and do the week of hell CT. I did it before. I am unemployed. Won't have to worry about calling out and losing my job. I just don't want to go on like this. Suicide isn't in me. I tried it and failed and don't have the balls to do it. So it's get clean or get on methadone.

 

[Missykins]

As far as Suboxone I tried it buying it off the street, I used it for about 2 months and after 3 weeks of "the miracle" I lost all my ambition, sex drive, etc. Iy was like I was a zombie. I don't think our brains are made to function on Partial agonists.

If you're using Suboxone without the supervision of a physician, then it's not going to work. Using it effectively is a little trickier than one would think. I rarely hear of someone who's getting it off the street and taking it haphazardly have much sucsess with the drug. They invariably end up snorting it, shooting it (neither of which makes sense to me given the way the drug is designed), or returning to active drug use.

 

[izzy66]

So it's get clean or get on methadone.

imo you'll regret ever getting started on methadone. if you have had this much trouble w/ opana, methadone has the potential to turn into an incredible nightmare for you. you want your life back? just get clean.
best of luck to you.
-izzy

 

[Lolie]

imo you'll regret ever getting started on methadone. if you have had this much trouble w/ opana, methadone has the potential to turn into an incredible nightmare for you. you want your life back? just get clean.
best of luck to you.
-izzy

^^^

Unless you want your life to revolve around methadone for the next twenty or thirty years, you need to have a plan for tapering off methadone at some point. I'd suggest sooner rather than later.

 

[mthdne]

I have been on methadone for 4 years now but I wouldn't reccommend it because it is a million times harder to get off of then any other drug and the withdrawal symptoms are a lot worse and last a lot longer.

If you can quit without the methadone I would....

 

[lozgod]

If you're using Suboxone without the supervision of a physician, then it's not going to work. Using it effectively is a little trickier than one would think. I rarely hear of someone who's getting it off the street and taking it haphazardly have much sucsess with the drug. They invariably end up snorting it, shooting it (neither of which makes sense to me given the way the drug is designed), or returning to active drug use.

I didn't do any other ROA's. Just sublingual. Started at 16mgs and got down to 4 quickly. At 16 I had no cravings but massive headaches and insomnia. 4mg worked like a charm side effect wise but lost my ambition and love for life. Seemed like substitution with a long half life.


To other posters. I can imagine methadone becoming a lifetime committment if I can't quit the opiates with only week long withdrawals then something with withdrawals that can last months would be a no brainer. I would stay on as long as I could be it 30-50 years. That can't be a way to live either. I did the CT with no comfort meds before when I wanted to be clean more than I wanted to use. I also attended NA meetings. People on here have an anti-NA sentiment at times but it worked for me and seen it work for people I know personally for years and years and are still clean. I guy I grew up with started sniffing dope at 14, was the first one in the neighborhood shooting at 16. Got clean around 22 and is clean to this day at 35 years old. No dope, alcohol, weed, nothing. Even gave up cigarettes.

Maybe I'll give NA another shot. It kept me clean from a cocaine addiction for 2 years till I stopped going figuring I could handle it on my own. Then came a drink or two with the old gang, then pills, and now whatever opiate I can get my hands on or afford and doing things I swore I'd never do. First I'd never shoot up dope, then pills, God knows what's next. I've been sick and contemplating robbing banks and jewlery stores. I spent 4 years in prison for trafficking cocaine when I was on the other side of the fence in my younger years. When I looked down on people like me and thought they were choosing to live like this. So I know the criminal element is in me but couldn't imagine being told what and when to eat, sleep, shower, watch TV, etc in my late 30s vs when I was a young buck and had nothing to lose.

Maybe I will try NA before methadone but I can't go on forever like this. I ain't at the point of wanting to quit because I want to. I am at the point I want to quit because I need to. There's a difference. Nothing beats a made up mind. If you WANT to quit you will quit. If you need to quit you might, or might not.