Clipjaw
Bluelighter
Love seems so nuts to me...I see it as a weakness almost, or perhaps a sign of stupidity. My first love, if you want to call it that, because as all of the emotion war veterans know your first time isn't, was also the first time my heart ever got broken. The second time, as I was slowly learning, was for real. Yet again, broken. Perhaps twice as hard. And it happens again, and again, until just tonight I sat in my friend's basement, and the reality of it hit me across the head like one of those rare times when you see a bird fly right into a window and then fall down to the ground. You really don't know if it's dead, or just knocked out for a while, but at the time it really doesn't matter, does it? Anyway, I was sitting there, laughing heartily at the movie dogma with 6 of my friends, and I looked away for a second, at a girl that I've liked for a while now, just not too strongly thanks to the cruel twist of fate that some like to call, 'a boyfriend'. Now, she's been talking of breaking up with him very soon, yadda yadda, so I get ideas. Well, this girl, absolutely gorgeous, intelligent, you know the works- the kind where you know you have no chance with but you always fantasize about at the worst possible time, she sits up on the couch with me and gives me a hug, leaning into my shoulder and resting her head as we both watch the movie. She's happy, laughing, you know, the kind of giggle that melts normal men into sputtering piles of jello, and I'm just sitting ther, stunned, resting my arm around her, wondering if there is some greater force out there waiting to play yet another sick joke on me using fate. It was that moment, right there, the one I described earlier, that hit me like a sack of doorknobs upside my head, when I realized that I was getting emotionally attatched. That was the moment I took the step down from man to boy, and lost my mind. I've spent months building myself stronger, remaining silent and emotionless at times of distress, bottling up all the rage, sadness, and glee that was possible...and all it took was a girl to express the slightest amount of happiness towards me to send it all wrecking down again. But I suppose everyone has an Achille's heel, eh?
- A freeverse poem, sorry that it's so long.
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- Clipjaw
- A freeverse poem, sorry that it's so long.
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- Clipjaw
