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?? ? THE SOCIAL CLUB v. Come Say Hi! ? ??

How are you feeling tubsy? Not going to call dealer today I hope?
 
Did yesterday, fucker flaked... for the better probably, got some real sleep for the first time in years, more exhausted than I've ever been.
 
^^^ did you? Seriously? Make contact?

***claps hands together twice ***
STOP THAT! NNNNNNO !
 
Yeah I did, we talked price everything, he just never came back with anything. Am kind of glad he didn't, just haven't been feeling so great lately.
 
Lorne??? said:
Your as bad as me! 10 or 11 bars would be great... 7 bars would be fine

Ugh
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Still wondering if I'll make it out of this alive. There are so many problems. I was on opiates continuously for such a long tie. It's the 35th day off oxycodone as well and I still don't feel right. No initiative. I'm at an age where I should be full of health and energy I do a lot of hot yoga and take care of my health apart from the drugs and I still don't feel right. It gets boring after a while. It was nice when I used to be able to function.

Should count my blessings but wha's the point when the worst thing is experiencing day after day the wasted potential. I have a good education I shouldn't be burning out like this. I don't know where things went wrong but I haven't had things much worse than this. I am directionless it generates so much anxiety. The next step down would be homelessness / jail / psych ward (most likely)... it's just not how I saw my life more than 5 years after graduating with a great degree. Feel like I ruined my life.
 
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bptubbs said:
Yeah I did, we talked price everything, he just never came back with anything. Am kind of glad he didn't, just haven't been feeling so great lately.
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Well tubbs, sorry if I was tugging the whistle on my own meth train at every intersection, I didn't realize you were getting anxious over urges. Unless you meant cravings for a different drug, in which case let me know and I'll hook up the pneumatics.

Your as bad as me! 10 or 11 bars would be great... 7 bars would be fine
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I did the math based on a paper's math (linked somewhere): A fifth of liquor/day ~ 8 bars of Xanax in seizure and anxiety risk. Alcoholics will dissolve their esophagus at some point, tolerance can't go up forever; but I don't know where the upper benzo limit is. Even without one, I don't think any drunk has used a full liter of liquor just to "calm his nerves" before an interview.
 
I actually take less now, though seriously, 7 bars would be GREAT

And Nordazepam and a couple others are partial agonists, they have ceiling effects, and probably Librium

otherwise, it keeps going up and up, if you abuse them, or have one foot in the grave and they help you hold a fork when you rarely eat

Cloanzepam and certain similar benzos are serotenergic, making them more effective (or it) for certain disorders (neurological in particular) and making tolerance a bit less of an issue, along with it’s long duration (yes, studies backed that up)
 
Scrofula said:
Well tubbs, sorry if I was tugging the whistle on my own meth train at every intersection, I didn't realize you were getting anxious over urges. Unless you meant cravings for a different drug, in which case let me know and I'll hook up the pneumatics.



I did the math based on a paper's math (linked somewhere): A fifth of liquor/day ~ 8 bars of Xanax in seizure and anxiety risk. Alcoholics will dissolve their esophagus at some point, tolerance can't go up forever; but I don't know where the upper benzo limit is. Even without one, I don't think any drunk has used a full liter of liquor just to "calm his nerves" before an interview.
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That is too difficult to really extrapolate with full accuracy; people can drink a fifth a liquor, and get drunk, or just a sustained buzz, 8 xanax bars may knock them out, or having them with retrograde amsnesia and stealing things for no reason

Not calling it wrong, just complicated; ethanol also wears off fast, so long acting benzos cannot really be compared, or those with sub-unit selectively

Would like that link, seems a interesting:)

And thanks Tubbs, it is a transition that is now, tba
(Scrofula, my late father could drink a fifth and then sell a job for 4-500$; of course he also took /wasValium at the time, and possibly Wellbutrin, so who knows?
Happy post Valentines Saturday-anime is on, Kamel Reds are here; I am alive, for now :)
 
Well I can fly away at anytime... If only I. Oils sustain flight would never be found! Damn raccoon tail(it’s Tanuki suit, still basically a raccoon tail- so after that, What up? (And smokings not cool lurkers, it’s just, uh, not)
 
Careful now tubbs. It's so easy to get sucked back in. For me a lot of the draw to relapse is simple boredom. I spent so many years baked on something or another. I got off the oxy and went straight to the bottle hard, not knowing I had hep c. So my liver's in bad shape but I quit drinking and got the antiviral treatment. I'm not gonna lie-it does get boring sometimes.

I ended up finding Stranger Things on Netflix. Anyone seen this one? I'm not much of a sci-fi person but this show is well-done and kept me on the edge of my seat. Two thumbs up! I made it through the fifth episode but curious about the girl, Eleven. Is she the daughter of the scientist at the laboratory? She was calling him Papa but I had first assumed she was snatched up like the other kids.
 
It's so easy to get sucked back in. For me a lot of the draw to relapse is simple boredom. I spent so many years baked on something or another. I got off the oxy and went straight to the bottle hard
T. Calderone


So many people want to point to dark forces at work, but I agree. It really pissed me off when I finally made the next connection: I wasn't depressed, I was fucking bored, so bored I'd get angry then hopeless then depressed. Add a substance and maybe that pile of rocks over there is a little more interesting.

-

I liked Stranger Things cause they did a great job making it look like a movie from the mid-80's when I was that age. But the story is kind of weak once you're done with it. I think your questions keep going into season two.
 
They don't have a "preview for all phone types" feature, which would be damn helpful. It looks fucking gorgeous on my screen, though.

Do you know how long I spent rendering those women in ascii? I wanted that hint of eroticism while remaining classy.
 
BehindtheShadow said:
Morning Scrof
How are you?
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Hello. I am reasonably alright.

I see they extracted your avatar along with the bad parts. Even with some additional sleep, it is terrifying me. In a good way.

PS: I'm a little curious, this is what my sigline looks like to me:

E7a0woP.png


I'm wondering how garbled that gets on phones.
 
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