Opinion The New world order has arrived and the the final solution is in place. Bye bye the free world hail the new overlords

[dalpat077]

you dont know shit about what they are doing. They are literally madanting and firing all non vaxed people, which affects the people of the land the maoris the most. jacdina has introduced south african levels of aparatheid and about to build extermination camps at this rate

Alright. Well. I cannot comment on the above nor even poke fun at it as it wouldn't be the right thing to.

If any of my posts/jokes/insinuations on this thread have been offensive or judgmental then I apologize. Given that you and I have had some wonderful interactions over the months: all was nothing but a little bit of fun between friends is all. I know that you know that I know that you're Māori (try saying that fast three times).

As a result of my taking potshots at you on this thread I can, however, confirm that the average life expectancy of the Māori people is shorter by quite a margin when compared to the “European or other” ethnic group as a result of them being marginalized and socio-economic conditions. That suggests to me that something is awry.

Anyway. You've got a lot of mates here and that give a shit about you (including me)!

Life expectancy continues to rise, however gains slowing; Māori narrowing gap but large disparity remains

Kiwi male life expectancy rises to 80, edging closer to females' life expectancy of 83.5 years.

www.stuff.co.nz

 

[deficiT]

you dont know shit about what they are doing. They are literally madanting and firing all non vaxed people, which affects the people of the land the maoris the most. jacdina has introduced south african levels of aparatheid and about to build extermination camps at this rate

Ok, well if that's all going on, that doesn't really sound like a socialism thing, sounds like fascism to me dawg. Socialism is about workers owning the means of production. Whatever you're talking about isn't socialism or communism.

 

[Deleted member 521610]

Ok, well if that's all going on, that doesn't really sound like a socialism thing, sounds like fascism to me dawg. Socialism is about workers owning the means of production. Whatever you're talking about isn't socialism or communism.

yup it aint socalism i voted for socalism and instead we got some crazy facist bitch lol

 

[dalpat077]

fucking sheep all sleep go fucking take some dmt and wake up u fucking idiots

Don't push it i.e. misdirected anger and frustration.

As it is and as a result of this (possible?) shit show: I've already alienated and hurt somebody's feelings here and who meant no harm i.e. @AutoTripper. And for that I apologize. Although that was my doing i.e. cannot lay that squarely at your door.

 

[deficiT]

You can rail about the NWO or whatever all you want, but your privilege ends just short of insulting people here. No more personal insults please.

 

[Deleted member 521610]

You can rail about the NWO or whatever all you want, but your privilege ends just short of insulting people here. No more personal insults please.

says the endless insults on me lmaooo, idgaf bro if people want to support nazis and commies and aparatheid type fucking shit time will tell and we put them on trial for crimes agaisnt humanity, fuck thep lanett i hope its get deep fried by nukes so humans are no longer alive

 

[birdup]

maori

There is nothing preventing Maori NZ citizens or Australian Aboriginal citizens from receiving vaccines. I'm more familiar with the situation with Indigenous Australians. Vaccine rates are very low, but this is a problem that extends way beyond COVID-19. Medical intervention is often left until the last moment in remote indigenous communities for what can best be described as cultural reasons. The mandating of vaccines has complicated the employability of an already career-vulnerable demographic. This is a genuine issue, but not one that can be solved while maintaining the individuals freedom and dignity of risk.

 

[dalpat077]

There is nothing preventing Maori NZ citizens or Australian Aboriginal citizens from receiving vaccines. I'm more familiar with the situation with Indigenous Australians. Vaccine rates are very low, but this is a problem that extends way beyond COVID-19. Medical intervention is often left until the last moment in remote indigenous communities for what can best be described as cultural reasons. The mandating of vaccines has complicated the employability of an already career-vulnerable demographic. This is a genuine issue, but not one that can be solved while maintaining the individuals freedom and dignity of risk.

NOW you show up! I could have used some fucking backup here in the past two days you know!

Nice post by the way. As always: rational, insightful, and thoughtful! That's why I hate it when the likes of you and @Perforated go off track and go dark (silent). It's a waste. Been meaning to say that for a while now.

 

[dalpat077]

It's not easy to try and quell an uprising in a foreign country e.g. NZ and stop people carrying on like wild animals in the streets remotely and on your own!

 

[AutoTripper]

Don't push it i.e. misdirected anger and frustration.

As it is and as a result of this (possible?) shit show: I've already alienated and hurt somebody's feelings here and who meant no harm i.e. @AutoTripper. And for that I apologize. Although that was my doing i.e. cannot lay that squarely at your door.

You need not apolagise from my view.. you did neither of those things to me, never have. It isn't in your heart or mind, I am too mature and aware to take any offense where none is intended.

I have just hit true rock bottom. I thought I had been there alteady. But rock bottom means zero will to live. The mindset alone will terminate you if you hold it.

Things went down at the start if the week. Damage done and escalating stress. I think I did break my right hand too. Adrenaline was so high for days and a lot of LSD kept me immune to the elements for several days. Flu and pneumonia for 3 weeks now on top of so much already atm. I have little will but life is so physically tough atm it's easy to lose focus.

I see my chiropractor today, 5 weeks snce last, 3 weeks ago we cancelled a drive elsewhere due to petrol shortage.

I'm too weak physically to stand but I need to evacuate my lungs of heavy mucus congestion.

No food, weed, kava, tea, outings, activity energy, comfort or mental rest until that task is done. It's an exhausting and torturous process though. I have 5 hrs until appointment and I need every minute, just to be washed, dressed, breathing air and put the door. It's a mountain climb, will and a basic formula the vital ingredients for survival.


I did take one step though. Experimental. Maybe risky? Email from a Dutch shop yesterday, Etizolam is gone.

I never was well enough to sort out BTC order to see me through any ength of taper.

Nothing the doctors could give me can I tolerate.

So no Etizolam pure powder = zero Benzos.

And my doses went up this week in order to basically manage escalating stress and anxiety and depression. 2 days ago I took 20 mg's. Yesterday, nothing. I managed symptoms a bit, wiped out by tiredness, in bed mostly 2 days & a night.

I don't know if I'm pushing things physically but I'm trying to address the psychological dependence aspect. Or I will keep using large amounts then be up shit creek. I am already.

I have been Dreading having to clear all this mucus from my airways in order to go to a treatment I desperately need in order to keep living no exaggeration five weeks between treatments is just too much at the moment.

I've tried to pick myself up but then maybe not in a sustainable way perhaps I just have to ride something through but really an entirely new direction in life is urgently called for I don't see where it's coming from.

So I'm just in a very extreme frame of mind, lots of pain and discomfort, and broken will. It isn't even all my fault.

But absolutely none of it is your own even slightly @dalpol077 you never have. I'm sorry I allowed you to assume that's what my post meant it was a very general admission. Ouch. My hand does hurt too not being on lots of drugs for once.

I will probably be later. It will be required.

Speaking of which. Because it has proved to be true until now amazingly on reflection- Where there is a will there is a way.

And vice versa.

 

[ageingpartyfiend]

hings went down at the start if the week. Damage done and escalating stress. I think I did break my right hand too. Adrenaline was so high for days and a lot of LSD kept me immune to the elements for several days. Flu and pneumonia for 3 weeks now on top of so much already atm. I have little will but life is so physically tough atm it's easy to lose focus.


I see my chiropractor today, 5 weeks snce last, 3 weeks ago we cancelled a drive elsewhere due to petrol shortage.

If you have actual influenza perhaps (definitely) you shouldn't be going to see the chiropractor - if I were him/her and you gave me flu knowing you had it I'd be fuming

If you have broken your hand you need to see an actual medical doctor 100%

If you have just hopped off 10mg etiz per day and have indeed ran out completely you seriously need to see doctor/hospital today if you cannot score any benzo-type drug -

come on now man

 

[birdup]

Benzo is withdrawal is hard, @AutoTripper.

It doesn't last forever, though.

Seek help if you need to. Benzo withdrawal can kill you.

 

[dalpat077]

You need not apolagise from my view.. you did neither of those things to me, never have. It isn't in your heart or mind, I am too mature and aware to take any offense where none is intended.

I have just hit true rock bottom. I thought I had been there alteady. But rock bottom means zero will to live. The mindset alone will terminate you if you hold it.

Things went down at the start if the week. Damage done and escalating stress. I think I did break my right hand too. Adrenaline was so high for days and a lot of LSD kept me immune to the elements for several days. Flu and pneumonia for 3 weeks now on top of so much already atm. I have little will but life is so physically tough atm it's easy to lose focus.

I see my chiropractor today, 5 weeks snce last, 3 weeks ago we cancelled a drive elsewhere due to petrol shortage.

I'm too weak physically to stand but I need to evacuate my lungs of heavy mucus congestion.

No food, weed, kava, tea, outings, activity energy, comfort or mental rest until that task is done. It's an exhausting and torturous process though. I have 5 hrs until appointment and I need every minute, just to be washed, dressed, breathing air and put the door. It's a mountain climb, will and a basic formula the vital ingredients for survival.


I did take one step though. Experimental. Maybe risky? Email from a Dutch shop yesterday, Etizolam is gone.

I never was well enough to sort out BTC order to see me through any ength of taper.

Nothing the doctors could give me can I tolerate.

So no Etizolam pure powder = zero Benzos.

And my doses went up this week in order to basically manage escalating stress and anxiety and depression. 2 days ago I took 20 mg's. Yesterday, nothing. I managed symptoms a bit, wiped out by tiredness, in bed mostly 2 days & a night.

I don't know if I'm pushing things physically but I'm trying to address the psychological dependence aspect. Or I will keep using large amounts then be up dhit creek. I am already.

I have been Dreading having to clear all this mucus from my airways in order to go to a treatment I desperately need in order to keep living like exaggeration five weeks between treatments it's just too much at the moment.

I've tried to pick myself up but then maybe not in a sustainable way perhaps I'll just have to write something through but really an entirely new direction in life is urgently called for I don't see where it's coming from.

So I'm just in a very extreme frame of mind, lots of pain and discomfort, and broken will. It isn't even all my fault.

But absolutely none of it is your own even slightly @dalpol077 you never have. I'm sorry I allowed you to assume that's what my post meant it was a very general admission. Ouch. My hand does hurt too not being on lots of drugs for once.

I will probably be later. It will be required.

Well I'm really sorry to read all of this. I had no idea. But please believe me when I say there's one or two things that you've posted about that I understand only too well.

Anyway. Thanks for taking my retort to you in such a fashion. It's no excuse but I was rather abrupt and direct at the time because I saw all of this shit unfolding and was thinking to myself that the OP was losing his shit mentally. But you only had good things to say at the time so I dunno why I chose that course of action.

I'm more concerned about your shortage of meds. and not being able to taper though. That too I understand only too well. I don't know what to say or how to help though. I just hope you can handle the withdrawal is all i.e. it ain't fun by any stretch of the imagination. And with all of your other issues: I hope it's bearable if it comes to that.

 

[AutoTripper]

Well I'm really sorry to read all of this. I had no idea. But please believe me when I say there's one or two things that you've posted about that I understand only too well.

Anyway. Thanks for taking my retort to you in such a fashion. It's no excuse but I was rather abrupt and direct at the time because I saw all of this shit unfolding and was thinking to myself that the OP was losing his shit mentally. But you only had good things to say at the time so I dunno why I chose that course of action.

I'm more concerned about your shortage of meds. and not being able to taper though. That too I understand only too well. I don't know what to say or how to help though. I just hope you can handle the withdrawal is all i.e. it ain't fun by any stretch of the imagination. And with all of your other issues: I hope it's bearable if it comes to that.

Thanks for again words from the heart and always so considerate and selfless as well.

Which is why there is no way I could ever feel offended or hurt or patronised or anything I have witnessed you saying that would just be silly and a matter of misinterpretation.

Now I've given a wrong impression because I don't actually have a shortage as such I don't know how much I do you have it's probably 5 g of powder which is equivalent to 7000 diazepam tablets that's a lot but taking 20 mg a day and in a situation where it is mentally and emotionally dangerous and risky to even attempt a taper or even to not go above a certain level like 15 mg even some days I need to take that in one single dose, to avert a high level panic attack.

I would have just placed one more order if I could have done to make absolutely sure that I did not need to mentally switch the tapering process knowing that I had more than enough to see me through it if say I don't reach a mentally stable position with access to support which I have tried but have failed to find or receive in the society with my physical health conditions being the real obstacle because I'm not really able to reach public places at certain times of the week or day.

So I basically just need to be moving in the right direction gradually rather than leaving it until the last gram because then I really would be up shit creek.

My mindset and thinking is so extreme though that really I wish it was an option for me to starve myself it would be so much easier than living anyway as it has been for decades now. That would save the problem of withdrawals to face which there is no way I can mentally and emotionally cope with at the moment I'll be done using the benzodiazepines two years ago to manage the anxiety disorder which was making it impossible for me to eat and gain weight, I was only 50 kg and dropping continually.

I stabilised myself at the time installed a new mindset and outlook and picked up in every way physically mentally personality wise I've got really steadily onto my feet early 2020 and physically I was actually the best I've been since 2005.

My plan was to not exceed say, 5 mg's daily then taper down.

Things actually went to plan but I did not anticipate March 2020 and all access to regular treatments being denied for the rest of the year add everything else in there is no way that I was not walking into one serious pit.

With no means of support or escape and a sickeningly depressing world.

January this year I was the worst I've ever been in my life from extreme to extreme and again.

None of this really could I have prevented I just did my best to survive it and this has been driving my own passionate declarations of protest against this agenda against humanity as I personally still see it.

@birdup hi there. Yes I am very aware that benzodiazepine withdrawal can be fatal and is a dangerous and risky game and must be approached with an understanding and caution and practicality but support is absolutely vital as well.

I'm about to begin my allergy routine the other side of that I will be able to access some peace again and I will be in a much better physical shape in a day.

Then I can focus on desensitising nerves again and releasing trauma and stress.

Now despite everything I mention I'm referred to honestly if I just could breathe normally round-the-clock without suffocating to death on mucus unless I massively restrict what I eat and ingest as well as fighting with every muscle in my body to keep clearing this mucus 24/7 just to see you another day, then Life would be a breeze and a pleasure even in this dark world but you put them all together and it's impossible living.

Those are the real problems in my own situation which nobody could possibly relate to not even my younger self.

 

[AutoTripper]

If you have actual influenza perhaps (definitely) you shouldn't be going to see the chiropractor - if I were him/her and you gave me flu knowing you had it I'd be fuming

If you have broken your hand you need to see an actual medical doctor 100%

If you have just hopped off 10mg etiz per day and have indeed ran out completely you seriously need to see doctor/hospital today if you cannot score any benzo-type drug -

come on now man

My chiropractor is a lady for a start I've seen this lady for years she understands her own body and immune system and mine as well and we both understand influenza it's not something which you catch because a bug is in your presence it's because your immune system is totally down and your energy is not there.

Survival of the fittest not exactly but the fit enough. The only way you get through six week influenza which I do have genuinely for the fifth time since December 2014 is by getting stronger and that includes mentally dropping what is not serving you and just focusing on what you need to get through.

This has worked for me the 4 previous times identical six week illnesses with pneumonia constantly springing up but I'm able to treat this and this time is by far the worst case of influenza I've had because I was in the worst mental and physical energy condition going into it unprepared so early in the season.

Now if I don't see my chiropractor for another five weeks I will definitely be dying here I'm not being dramatic I would have died earlier this year before the first treatment from her and I picked up a lot from there I just haven't had regular enough treatments and so many things have happened trauma and stress number one.

I cannot guarantee that nobody will contract influenza from me visiting a public building today but I do practice and astoundingly high level of personal hygiene I keep my hands washed I never put my hands near my mouth or cough or sneeze onto them if I suspect I have contracted any germs onto my hands from a surface or from my own body onto my own hands I consciously avoid touching anything and wash my hands and not even touching the taps with any surfaces I am protecting.

I will also be fresh out of a hot shower with new clean clothes on or symptoms managed so there will be no running nose and fresh thick kitchen papers should I need to blow my nose which I am extremely hygienic about and understand how to keep the germs in the centre of the folder tissue with no exposure or chance of leaking out not like every surface of a handkerchief used 100 times over like people like Giuliani, live n TV who are supposed to be fucking clever lol, mid pandemic too!

Presidents bloody lawyer. Lacking the intellect to appreciate how germs can be spread.

So there is actually in my mind a very very low chance of me passing influenza to anybody today there is no chance of passing it to my chiropractor because you do not get influenza unless your immunesystem is heavily compromised that's how it works.

Also the way that hygiene is working at the clinic because of the other thing going on the whole treatment room is cleaned down with steam cleaning in a very professional and comprehensive manner every surface and part of the floor between each patient for five minutes a time a major inconvenience to the great lady but she does it without moaning at all (please don't deflect that back at me, I know I moan I do it because it hurts and it's hard, Not because I consider it an unalienable right)

So that risk you consider just isn't there how you perceive it in this situation and if I stay here I won't see her for five weeks now and there is no way I will live through this.

So when you say come on man as if I'm being unreasonable I say it's the other way round, And that that is an unfair assertion and judgement that you make here.

10 mg's of Etizolam was never sustainable. I'm not saying it's responsible or clever and I've never encouraged anybody to use it themselves make out it's a good safe thing.

You probably saw above maybe not but I haven't run out I still have a lot left but I'm not in any position or foothold to even commence a tapering process it will just the dangerous while the situation remains so volatile potentially.

There is no way the doctor could prescribe me an alternative benzodiazepine which I could tolerate without suffocating to death on it faster then I would die from a cold turkey withdrawal I would have more chance that way.

I do need to seek the in town walking service addiction team of nurses and doctors just for consultation and sounding board and basically discussing the facts of the matter with people who I'm hoping are qualified to understand and appreciate the implications and severity of various aspects of my situation.

So I am coming on. I do you feel you can give me a hard time and criticism I don't fully deserve at times I'm sure you might not agree there.

This is one such example though.

As far as my hand goes I didn't think it was broken because I can still use it and manoeuvre it if anything it's a fracture which is not affecting my fingers only the knuckes on the small two. And pain. Whatever it is I don't see any sort of splint been necessary or helpful and there is no medication I would be prescribed except pain medicine which again I would be allergic to in every case I have my own pain medicines.

 

[dalpat077]

I recalled the below from memory (but then found it and quoted it now). Laughed my head off at the time!

Well shucks me I thought I was a right boring cunt, I just checked seems I’ve attracted 23 followers?

 

[AutoTripper]

I recalled the below from memory (but then found it and quoted it now). Laughed my head off at the time!

Haha. There are far more popular people than myself being popular is not something I aspire to but regardless this is another statistic which makes this world to my own mind very wrong again. Just, MO lol.

 

[dalpat077]

My chiropractor is a lady for a start I've seen this lady for years she understands her own body and immune system and mine as well and we both understand influenza it's not something which you catch because a bug is in your presence it's because your immune system is totally down and your energy is not there.

Survival of the fittest not exactly but the fit enough. The only way you get through six week influenza which I do have genuinely for the fifth time since December 2014 is by getting stronger and that includes mentally dropping what is not serving you and just focusing on what you need to get through.

This has worked for me the 4 previous times identical six week illnesses with pneumonia constantly springing up but I'm able to treat this and this time is by far the worst case of influenza I've had because I was in the worst mental and physical energy condition going into it unprepared so early in the season.

Now if I don't see my chiropractor for another five weeks I will definitely be dying here I'm not being dramatic I would have died earlier this year before the first treatment from her and I picked up a lot from there I just haven't had regular enough treatments and so many things have happened trauma and stress number one.

I cannot guarantee that nobody will contract influenza from me visiting a public building today but I do practice and astoundingly high level of personal hygiene I keep my hands washed I never put my hands near my mouth or cough or sneeze onto them if I suspect I have contracted any germs onto my hands from a surface or from my own body onto my own hands I consciously avoid touching anything and wash my hands and not even touching the taps with any surfaces I am protecting.

I will also be fresh out of a hot shower with new clean clothes on or symptoms managed so there will be no running nose and fresh thick kitchen papers should I need to blow my nose which I am extremely hygienic about and understand how to keep the germs in the centre of the folder tissue with no exposure or chance of leaking out not like every surface of a handkerchief used 100 times over why people like Giuliani, live n TV who are supposed to be fucking clever lol, mid pandemic too!

Presidents bloody lawyer. Lacking the intellect to appreciate how germs can be spread.

So there is actually in my mind a very very low chance of me passing influenza to anybody today there is no chance of passing it to my chiropractor because you do not get influenza unless you're a mean system is heavily compromised that's how it works.

Also the way that hygiene is working at the clinic because of the other thing going on the whole treatment room is cleaned down with steam cleaning in a very professional and comprehensive manner every surface and part of the floor between each patient for five minutes a time a major inconvenience to the great lady but she does it without moaning at all (please don't deflect that back at me, I know I moan I do it because it hurts and it's hard, Not because I considerate and unalienable right)

So that risk you consider just isn't there how are you perceive it in this situation and if I stay here I won't see her for five weeks now and there is no way I will live through this.

So when you say come on man as if I'm being unreasonable I say it's the other way round, And that that is an unfair assertion and judgement but you make.

10 mg's of Etizolam was never sustainable. I'm not saying it's responsible or clever and I've never encouraged anybody to use it themselves make out it's a good divorce thing.

You probably saw above maybe not but I haven't run out I still have a lot left but I'm not in any position or foothold to even commence a tapering process it will just the dangerous while the situation remains so volatile potentially.

There is no way the doctor could prescribe me an alternative benzodiazepine which I could tolerate without suffocating to death on it faster then I would die from a cold turkey withdrawal I would have more chance that way.

I do need to seek the in town walking service addiction team of nurses and doctors just for consultation and sounding board and basically discussing the facts of the matter with people who I'm hoping are qualified to understand and appreciate the implications and severity of various aspects of my situation.

So I am coming on. I do you feel you can give me a hard time and criticism I don't fully deserve at times I'm sure you might not agree there.

This is one such example though.

As far as my hand goes I didn't think it was broken because I can still use it and manoeuvre it if anything it's a fracture which is not affecting my fingers only the knuckes on the small two. And pain. Whatever it is I don't see any sort of splint been necessary or helpful and there is no medication I would be prescribed except pain medicine which again I would be allergic to in every case I have my own pain medicines.

Is there a particular thread somewhere around these parts where you have detailed all of your ailments that I can go read up on?

I'd really like to know and discuss. But I fear if we carry on here then a) @TripSitterNZ is going to think that the CCP has hijacked his thread on purpose and b) @Zopiclone bandit will come mow us all down (and I think he's in the UK also so don't want to expose you to any further health risks)!

 

[AutoTripper]

Is there a particular thread somewhere around these parts where you have detailed all of your ailments that I can go read up on?

I'd really like to know and discuss. But I fear if we carry on here then a) @TripSitterNZ is going to think that the CCP has hijacked his thread on purpose and b) @Zopiclone bandit will come mow us all down (and I think he's in the UK also so don't want to expose you to any further health risks)!

TripSitter is my bro. Maybe this offtopic deflection is a healthy detour while everybody takes stock, as it seemed there was no direction here?
I have detailed a lot around. Lol. Details. It will be so scattered I'm really not sure how I would direct or retrace it would all be there but my head isn't really very functional currently.

There are so many things I'm supposed to be doing which I normally would like orders to place for health supplements and foods people to contact private messages to follow up on and just bits and bobs in life which I have to completely abandon for now in quite a helpless condition.

If I can just pick my head up again and begin to depend less on benzos and also actually take a rest from LSD I've now taken 354 doses at 100 µg since February and recently probably more in a set time frame and ever. Like 150 tabs maybe in 5 weeks. I could figure it out accurately just by thinking back to the last seven trips but it's not necessary and the figures were clocking up so fast I just stopped fussing about it that's an overall count is worth keeping because then I know how much I have used and what remains of each it's more a stock tally thing.

Right it's finally steam and her lotion time I can breve a lot better than I could when I got up the initial steps of the treatment process.

Turmeric and cayenne pepper next is amazing at facilitating mucus evacuation right before the steam nhalation.

Once I have started the steam it's just dominoes to get to the other side of it and I will be able to breathe 90% more comfortably in less than one hour.

I will have a cup of black coffee which will be nice after lots of sleep also a big dose of edible cannabis which will be made lifting.

A hot shower and then I will prepare some Kava to be drinking en route and home.

I'm going to try and pick myself up here I really am I've been resting in bed to get enough physical energy to do this today now I need to get comfortable and able to breathe then I will be able to actually feel a sense of joy and relief and comfort then I have a treatment which will be life-saving or sustaining at least.

I then I will have a chance again with nervous system and immune system and digestive function restored and rebooted after it crashed heavily again from influenza and stress directly.

Thank you @dalpol077 For helping me to accomplish this determined bid to keep pushing on which I always was going to do but it was feeling a lot harder just one hour ago.

 

[dalpat077]

TripSitter is my bro. Maybe this offtopic deflection is a healthy detour while everybody takes stock, as it seemed there was no direction here?
I have detailed a lot around. Lol. Details. It will be so scattered I'm really not sure how I would direct or retrace it would all be there but my head isn't really very functional currently.

There are so many things I'm supposed to be doing which I normally would like orders to place for health supplements and foods people to contact private messages to follow up on and just bits and bobs in life which I have to completely abandon for now in quite a helpless condition.

If I can just pick my head up again and begin to depend less on benzos and also actually take a rest from LSD I've now taken 354 doses at 100 µg since February and recently probably more in a set time frame and ever. Like 150 tabs maybe in 5 weeks. I could figure it out accurately just by thinking back to the last seven trips but it's not necessary and the figures were clocking up so fast I just stopped fussing about it that's an overall count is worth keeping because then I know how much I have used and what remains of each it's more a stock tally thing.

Right it's finally steam and her lotion time I can breve a lot better than I could when I got up the initial steps of the treatment process.

Turmeric and cayenne pepper next is amazing at facilitating mucus evacuation right before the steam nhalation.

Once I have started the steam it's just dominoes to get to the other side of it and I will be able to breathe 90% more comfortably in less than one hour.

I will have a cup of black coffee which will be nice after lots of sleep also a big dose of edible cannabis which will be made lifting.

A hot shower and then I will prepare some Kava to be drinking en route and home.

I'm going to try and pick myself up here I really am I've been resting in bed to get enough physical energy to do this today now I need to get comfortable and able to breathe then I will be able to actually feel a sense of joy and relief and comfort then I have a treatment which will be life-saving or sustaining at least.

I then I will have a chance again with nervous system and immune system and digestive function restored and rebooted after it crashed heavily again from influenza and stress directly.

Thank you @dalpol077 For helping me to accomplish this determined bid to keep pushing on which I always was going to do but it was feeling a lot harder just one hour ago.

Alright well at the risk of us getting into shit for going W-A-Y off topic:

I guess, and to be direct, I'm asking you exactly what your health problems are about. I mean to say: are we talking about physical health problems here or substance abuse problems or both? Mental health: I'm sure there's well founded issues (you're not alone I assure you on that one).

What I'm trying to figure out: exactly WHAT are your issues in life. Not for any other reason than to figure out if there's anything I or anybody else can do to help i.e. certainly not to take the piss or preach.