The May Getting / Staying Sober Thread vs. April showers bring May flowers

[Mr.Scagnattie]

Hey everyone hope all is well. Almost done with the month of may. Besides being in a sober house my life is fucking mint these days, i got legit friends and a girl that really cares about me that has never fucked with drugs/booze. Parents are happy so I don't know what else to really ask for. I guess i'm not filthy rich which sucks but I'll get there Have a good day everyone.

Glad to hear it, Mass. Keep it up man.

 

[ad lib]

Hey everyone hope all is well. Almost done with the month of may. Besides being in a sober house my life is fucking mint these days, i got legit friends and a girl that really cares about me that has never fucked with drugs/booze. Parents are happy so I don't know what else to really ask for. I guess i'm not filthy rich which sucks but I'll get there Have a good day everyone.

Awesome awesome awesome! I'm happy for you

 

[aliencowstorm]

did my forth and fifth step tonight. was great :D

Wow...that's awesome. Makes me feel good about myself seeing others on this path. I remember doing my first 4th and 5th...they are such a wonderful / emotional experience.

You've got to be super stoked and proud of yourself, being able to do that 4th and share it with another in your 5th...inspiring!

 

[Timber]

Still hanging in there. No longer thinking I will have a quick fix to the fatigue issue. Still have some more tests on the heart to be done, but while the problems are there -- they are not likely causing all of the pattern of fatigue I feel. Immediate exertion fatigue, yes, delayed exertion fatigue? Not likely. I still have a couple minor (heh relatively speaking) surgeries in my future, but neither the cardiologist, nor the cardiothorasic surgeon thinks that it will correct the fatigue issue beyond just getting me better blow flow to my legs. So far the arteries going to the heart, and my brain itself are testing fine. They don't want to do anything with the heart valve itself as its not quite severe enough, but they still ordered another round of testing to make sure what is what. They used the dreaded CFS ... Which doesn't bring me a lot of optimism on that front.


I'll see what happens. If nothing else I get some very expensive video of my heart under stress (and I'll try to get a copy for home viewing).

Still hanging in there as far as staying clean, but definitely feeling the lack of pain control.

 

[ad lib]

Still hanging in there. No longer thinking I will have a quick fix to the fatigue issue. Still have some more tests on the heart to be done, but while the problems are there -- they are not likely causing all of the pattern of fatigue I feel. Immediate exertion fatigue, yes, delayed exertion fatigue? Not likely. I still have a couple minor (heh relatively speaking) surgeries in my future, but neither the cardiologist, nor the cardiothorasic surgeon thinks that it will correct the fatigue issue beyond just getting me better blow flow to my legs. So far the arteries going to the heart, and my brain itself are testing fine. They don't want to do anything with the heart valve itself as its not quite severe enough, but they still ordered another round of testing to make sure what is what. They used the dreaded CFS ... Which doesn't bring me a lot of optimism on that front.


I'll see what happens. If nothing else I get some very expensive video of my heart under stress (and I'll try to get a copy for home viewing).

Still hanging in there as far as staying clean, but definitely feeling the lack of pain control.

I hope your surgeries go okay You're doing great for being clean after undergoing surgery, that's for sure. I hope the tests/surgeries provide you with conclusive answers so you can start feeling better soon.

 

[Serotonin101]

Going back to work where the last time I worked there I was high daily was triggering. I had strange deja vu moments and felt like something was "missing". It'll pass though.

 

[neversickanymore]

hard week, but its all really good rite now.. hope everyone is doing well

 

[Mass08]

Recovery is startin to get challenging seems like all my best friends are either relapsing or getting arrested...sweet. I'm clean at the end of the day so that's all that matters. Have a good one everyone.

 

[ad lib]

Going back to work where the last time I worked there I was high daily was triggering. I had strange deja vu moments and felt like something was "missing". It'll pass though.

Memories and association is so hard for me too. I walked into my parents house the other week, and I couldn't help but think "wow, last time I was here I was high every single day" and it immediately initiated a craving. I felt so much stronger though upon leaving because I was able to see how far I've come.

hard week, but its all really good rite now.. hope everyone is doing well

Sorry to hear that you've had a hard week NSA Hope you're able to enjoy this long weekend.

Recovery is startin to get challenging seems like all my best friends are either relapsing or getting arrested...sweet. I'm clean at the end of the day so that's all that matters. Have a good one everyone.

You've come a long way. Recovery isn't easy, it's fucking hard. You're not living the life your friends are anymore- look where it's landing them. At the end of the day you have your clean time, your health, and your freedom. Keep it up

 

[Captain.Heroin]

Thanks, CH. That's old news though. Today is actually 61 no h. I have had some kratom this week, so I am not totally clean, but I am keeping everything legal.

Good news even if it's old news.

Congrats again man.

Keeping it legal is an important part of being clean.

Even though you have had some kratom I still consider you clean in my eyes.

Recovery is startin to get challenging seems like all my best friends are either relapsing or getting arrested...sweet. I'm clean at the end of the day so that's all that matters. Have a good one everyone.

A lot of my old friends either lost their minds and ended up in a psych ward, or died of an accidental/intentional overdose (it's hard to know for sure), or went to jail/prison, and some of my current ones are still suffering fates like this.

So trust me when I say I know how you're feeling man. You have to still take care of yourself as #1 priority and as long as you're staying clean and safe, congrats.

 

[neversickanymore]

Sorry to hear that you've had a hard week NSA Hope you're able to enjoy this long weekend.

Thanks.. not hard in bad.. not hard in the addiction kicking.. just allot of work this week and it was week two of quitting smoking, and I have not, and maybe never will learn, that sleep is to important to slack on.. needed some lovens as well.. so with some really good sleep, a long weekend, really sore abs from so much loven.. I'm heading up to a cabin in the woods... hikes, a bit of kayaking, grilling and a vid marathon.. YEAH IM DOING JUST GREAT.. hope you are well RX... everybody enjoy the rest of the weekend!!

 

[ad lib]

Thanks.. not hard in bad.. not hard in the addiction kicking.. just allot of work this week and it was week two of quitting smoking, and I have not, and maybe never will learn, that sleep is to important to slack on.. needed some lovens as well.. so with some really good sleep, a long weekend, really sore abs from so much loven.. I'm heading up to a cabin in the woods... hikes, a bit of kayaking, grilling and a vid marathon.. YEAH IM DOING JUST GREAT.. hope you are well RX... everybody enjoy the rest of the weekend!!

Ah that sounds like a perfect weekend! Enjoy, my friend

 

[Serotonin101]

I don't get weekend with my job. Or holidays. Oh well it is what it is.

 

[Ian937]

Same here /\ am off each Friday and do have tomorrow off :D
Still clean... Hooked up w a coworker lol this last 1.5 wk things have changed in a good way..she's 29 im 23 but ya we do have fun. I have $$ now that im not on that shit, got me a new place... Ayyy things are lookin' up!!

 

[Mass08]

Glad to hear that Ian. Age is just a number if you guys enjoy each others company.

 

[Serotonin101]

After I get off work today, I should have around 43 hours. They hate paying overtime so I'm hoping for a half day tomorrow and off on Wednesday

 

[Cartesia]

So I joined the march gettubg/staying sober thread at it's inception. Anyone else still around from back then?
I was tapering my opiate dose significantly and doing well. Then life happened. as it does. Actually moreso than it usually does.

I've put the rest in spoiler tags because there are probably alot of people here who should not read any of what I'm about to say. If you fear you're one of them, do not get curious, I dont want to trigger bad things but I genuinely need help I've found myself in a situation that is basically the worst I ever have, and it could end up being my undoing ( or yours). That said maybe if you've been in a problematic situation we can share and come up with strategies/help each other.

NSFW:

Spoiler

It's been like willy wonka's drug factory around here lately, and the cash has been thrown around far too irresponsibly (had a viable small business/self employed venture going, making me ~ $100-200 a week on top of my normal job, started up with a partner who provided half the startup capitol (capital?) . Partner bailed. I offered to take over his half. Blew it instead ($1300 owed now and no more liquid assets for said business venture, hence no additional income). I bumped into a handfull of people with ridiculous access to all sorts of things I've always wanted but never had. I dont believe in heaven and hell but satan himself planned my May/June. I'm on 4 weeks holidays from my regular job too, culminating in my best friends birthday which is going to be off the absolute hook of course. (I am his housemate too.)

Now I am facing not only the same old opiate addiction (back at my old higher dose), but also the possibility of developing an amphetamine addiction alongside it.

I'm convinced if I play my cards wisely I can poly-drug my way out of addiction, but I'm playing with fire with a history of burning myself and it scares the shit out of me. As of today I begin tapering the opiates on the provision that I will allow myself any other drug in their place as long as it is a STEEP taper and I do not rely on the same drug to offset the opiate withdrawals every day (to prevent new addiction)... When I say new addiction.. I dont mean 'I felt uncomfortable after taking drug 'x' for 'z' weeks.. I mean.. Years of being a slave to it. Short term development of dependance is not something that I fear, except for the fact that it itself is the beginning of long term dependance.

I hope you guys will still have me in the sober living thread. I am really struggling in a mental battle at the moment, everyone around me IRL is pushing me the wrong way. (I'm on a months holidays, just met these people with the sources, just met a girl in the honeymoon stage of daily addictive drug use, parents are melting down a'la old-skool (youd think i could escape this after I left home sigh), business partner bailing on my right when business takes off drastically and now I've got a tonne of angry/annoyed clients thanks to my own actions/irresponsibility.

All of these events precipitated out of one single action in my life... moving house. If it had not happened, I might have been tapered halfway off the opes.
But then I suppose something in life was bound to come along, and I need to find new ways to deal with that.

I hope you all will still have me here in the sober living thread. I know technically its nothing like that, maybe I am a cheat. But I really need a support group and you seem to be the ones. I'd also love to help anyone I can. My experience ranges anything up to but not including needles, for 10 years. If anyone would like to talk privately please dont hesitate to let me know.

Please, some advice. Obviously avoiding things, focusing on the long term.. are all... obvious. If anyone can give me a practical tip that would be the greatest, I dont see myself standing much chance against practicality. Has anyone done the 'anything buy your addiction' plan? or anything else related? can anyone offer me assistance? There is one big benefit I have over alot of you. Where I am you can't really score 'on the street'. So if I cut ties, ties are cut. (Not that I could actually bring myself to cut ties properly.)

Just realised may is already almost over... But I want to start this now. If anyone needs a last minute may boost please hit me up too, I find it much easier to talk sense to others than myself.

 

[neversickanymore]

Neversick here.. staying strong.. Took a crazy 6 year SB addiction down to a exTARcuric.. up to a methadone, exTAR, roxy, xannax addiction and in august after a three week taper I came off 150mgpd Methadone, 260mgpd roxy, 6mgpd xanax.. and now i'm rolin clean lookn at getn on six months.. have to remember that becoming a junkie doesn't cure me of my love of alcohol.. Thanks to everyBLiter that's fightin and supporting everyone whose taken a place on our line of this battle field..

^from march.. yep Im around

 

[NeckHudson]

today is exactly 21 days with suboxone 1-2 mg every other day. coming from a gram a day habit. I just took my last piece today im nervous about withdrawal. any advise. I hate the crippling anxiety. I just got an amazing new job and am ready to leave that life behind. this job is what is saving my life. im so busy I don't have time to even try and score. also making double my old salary. now I wont have time to sit at home and kick the subs. any advise would be amazing. everyone have a blessed month thank you.

 

[Serotonin101]

Stay hydrated, eat even if you feel you can't, maybe get some clonidine from your doc, immodium, and some herbal sleepaids (sedating antihistamines may cause/increase rls during withdrawal).