I thought I'd share my experience of my mild addiction to and withdrawal from kratom over the past three weeks. I have no prior history of addiction save for cigarettes, and my intake of those was limited and quitting relatively painless. Although familiar with several different opiates, my usage had always been very infrequent.
My usage of kratom up until three weeks ago had been virtually daily (only 1 to 3 days off per month) since September or October.. However, I only ever dosed one time per day, at night, using a sedating Bali or Indo. Indeed, the idea of dosing multiple times per day was never enticing or even considered. Extracts were only ever used on several occasions, and always in conjunction with plain leaf. Having taken days off for various reasons before, I knew what that day of withdrawal felt like: Fatigue. A feeling throughout the entire body I suppose could be described as "chills," but different from and not as bad as the often-compared-to flu chills are. Inability to sleep more than 5 hours that night. Some RLS, but not extreme. Heightened emotionality (and not necessarily in a bad way, indeed moments of happiness or awe are magnified more than negative emotions and were tear-inducing at times). None of these symptoms appreciably interfered with daily functioning, however.
Although I only ever used once a day, I quit because I came to realize that I was shutting out parts of my life so that I could drift off into kratom-land at night. My friends were increasingly neglected, and my partner too (including sexually all too often, kratom pretty much demolishes my libido). Kratom for me is a very solitary drug, and I have always associated the experience with being at home, by myself or only with my partner. Whenever I would be invited out or asked what I was doing, I would often turn it down with some poor excuse. On the occasions that I would decide to do something else at night, the choice was often agonizing... getting me out my door or to avoid my house altogether was a remarkably difficult task.
Upon pushing forward in days without kratom, the mild withdrawals remained just that: mild. The physical aspects were virtually over by day 4, and in the days prior were easily masked by exercise or etizolam (which I obtained a bit of for withdrawal and used 1mg of for three nights, granting me a solid 8 or 9 hours of sleep each night!). As others have noted in other threads, usage multiple times per day (which also seems correlated with prior opiate addiction...) is what really seems to be set off bad withdrawals for people with this plant, if kept to once daily and using only plain leaf I expect that my experience lies somewhere in the middle of the bell-curve as far as intensity of withdrawal goes.
The psychological pull, however, is very powerful. As I noted prior, my behavior and personality changed quite dramatically once I reached daily use of the plant (a process that took several years, with long, long breaks in between use). Night time was kratom-time and mostly alone-time. Undoubtedly the wintertime also contributed to being able to easily fall into this pattern - I become more of a recluse and frequently depressed every winter, but never to the extent of this winter, and clearly the kratom compounded that tendency! Since quitting, I have been rekindling friendships, my relationship, finding new activities, exercising much more, going out more, etc.
After ten days without kratom, I took a tiny bit one night. It felt great, and my tolerance was way down. Today, almost 2 weeks after, I have taken a little bit again. I am hoping greatly that with the beauty and energy of the spring and summer, that I will be able to use this plant more sparingly. I am taking steps in my life to expand my horizons socially and personally, which I feel will help greatly in that process. But I still have the clarity to call a spade a spade: I have used kratom twice after quitting it and wanting to quit it because I saw how it was negatively affecting me.
Total sobriety has always been a very difficult thing for me, scarcely a day has gone by since my teenage years that hasn't included some sort of substance use even if its just alcohol or marijuana. Even though I've never been one to use all the time and do not feel that my use has ever been a problem that threatens my daily functioning or growth as an individual, I do find a strong psychological pull towards intoxication that is hard to resist. Kratom is a relatively benign substance (and also one which I enjoy very much!) which I believe I can incorporate responsibly and sparingly into my life as long as other things remain the focus of life. I guess we'll see where it goes from here!