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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

The I'm Fucked Megathread: FEED ME

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just awoke from a ketamized valiumated sleep after a heavy day of k dmt and lsd, today i will be mild on myself, rest a recovery, lots of green tea lol

spliff and maybe more sleep

good night EADD <3
 
gawd, i feel AWFUL. Practically passed out in the shower, and heaving loads. No way I can eat..., unfortunately since i REALLY NEED TO. Guess I'll have a helping of the protein milkshake mugz left behind. Can't believe it's sunday. This sucks.

Gonna find a film to put on and try to go to sleep through it. Then have some proper food when I wake up. If I wake up, feel like I'm at death's door.

I want huuuuuugz
 
returned from a night of booze, a small amount of mdma and mxe. probably the best mxe experience to date, that stuff is amazing. seems to be a different experience every time. feeling pretty good today, kinda enlightened. perfect dose.... whatever the dose was
 
Whoops. I meant to stop doing stims at about midday yesterday. But I'm still at it. I've been sat here faffing about for 36 hours. That's really quite disturbing... that
I've just sat at my computer for an ENTIRE DAY.

Got some sleep dep visuals going on. Not colours or swirls.... just everything is... animated and halo-d.

Right, this'un will be the last bomb. It will it will it will.

Hopefully I'll be able to nap for some of the afternoon and evening, don't want to feel like shit next week.


lol sort yourself out :P sat at a computer bashing stims for 36 hours solid is a sorry state of affairs
 
^ Your hardly one to talk, buying crap meph every week, drug disaster every week.. big whine thereafter about why you shouldn't of done it and how minced your head is.. that's a pretty sad state of affairs. Doing drugs but not being able to handle the after effects.

There's that many "my head is fucked" posts from you on here it's quite laughable you should give any advice or take moral highground.
 
^ Your hardly one to talk, buying crap meph every week, drug disaster every week.. big whine thereafter about why you shouldn't of done it and how minced your head is.. that's a pretty sad state of affairs. Doing drugs but not being able to handle the after effects.

There's that many "my head is fucked" posts from you on here it's quite laughable you should give any advice or take moral highground.

im fully aware of the error of my ways. im speaking from experience. and from my experience i can confirm that sitting at a computer bashing stims for 36 hours being fully aware its going to make you feel like shit is a sorry state of affairs. not that i really give a fuck as i dont know angelsmoke and cannot judge or criticize anybody elses choices in life as what they choose to do is up to them. but whatever, it appears ive just bothered wasting my time justifying myself to you
 
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10 seconds after writing that last post I got a phonecall. Was fed whiskey and ephedrine (wierd after the benzo's) to get me to play guitar at a party.

Woke up a half hour ago with my shoes on. Eugh.
 
hi guys, last night was fun, avatars and shivas mix well, gunna catch up on some sleep,maybe a vallie or 2, been free of beer since friday and been drinking nuff green tea :)
anyways a spliffwards is thee way forwards
 
just given my new batch of mxe a tester dose. seems better than the previous lot I had.
 
I gave up on film and just went to bed. Only just got up, so hopefully that'll help sort me out. Still feel pretty awful. So, I'm not fucked anymore, but thought I'd reply in here to kinda wave hi to ColtDan and say -- you've no need to justify yourself, and I agree it's a pretty sad state of affairs. More so if it becomes a way of life for me again.

Hopefully it won't. Shame I can't be a bit more convincing than "hopefully it won't" but what's the point? I don't feel convinced. I can easily see myself getting back into doing stims every night, which is scary given how much I screwed myself up on mephedrone. I need something else to live for, and I don't have anything to be honest. I've been thinking about uprooting and moving somewhere else in the country. Cambridge is so fucking bleak. My life is so fucking bleak. What course of action than self destruction is there when you feel depressed about your life...

Oops, self indulgent self-justification ramble. Maybe I'm just looking for any excuse to get out of my tree on stims. That could be it, too. I <3 stims.
 
I gave up on film and just went to bed. Only just got up, so hopefully that'll help sort me out. Still feel pretty awful. So, I'm not fucked anymore, but thought I'd reply in here to kinda wave hi to ColtDan and say -- you've no need to justify yourself, and I agree it's a pretty sad state of affairs. More so if it becomes a way of life for me again.

Hopefully it won't. Shame I can't be a bit more convincing than "hopefully it won't" but what's the point? I don't feel convinced. I can easily see myself getting back into doing stims every night, which is scary given how much I screwed myself up on mephedrone. I need something else to live for, and I don't have anything to be honest. I've been thinking about uprooting and moving somewhere else in the country. Cambridge is so fucking bleak. My life is so fucking bleak. What course of action than self destruction is there when you feel depressed about your life...

Oops, self indulgent self-justification ramble. Maybe I'm just looking for any excuse to get out of my tree on stims. That could be it, too. I <3 stims.

hi Angel smoke, have you got some downers that you could take to get the edge of stim needing/fiending? hope you are ok, i bet youve been up hours!
 
I gave up on film and just went to bed. Only just got up, so hopefully that'll help sort me out. Still feel pretty awful. So, I'm not fucked anymore, but thought I'd reply in here to kinda wave hi to ColtDan and say -- you've no need to justify yourself, and I agree it's a pretty sad state of affairs. More so if it becomes a way of life for me again.

Hopefully it won't. Shame I can't be a bit more convincing than "hopefully it won't" but what's the point? I don't feel convinced. I can easily see myself getting back into doing stims every night, which is scary given how much I screwed myself up on mephedrone. I need something else to live for, and I don't have anything to be honest. I've been thinking about uprooting and moving somewhere else in the country. Cambridge is so fucking bleak. My life is so fucking bleak. What course of action than self destruction is there when you feel depressed about your life...

Oops, self indulgent self-justification ramble. Maybe I'm just looking for any excuse to get out of my tree on stims. That could be it, too. I <3 stims.

I have often stayed awake for days staring at my computer just hammering stims into myself.

After my last 4/5 day sesh with no sleep at all I got a bit worried(theres a thread around somewhere) The only way I could stop was to cut off my route of supply. I deleted my numbers and have avoided all those contacts it was hard but it worked.

Havent touched a stim since then (3? 4 weeks? dono). Just replaced them with other stuff, alcohol mostly again. So its not as if one is better than the other but at least this way I can sleep every couple of nights for a while.

Anyway, I know how you feel. All the best hun.
 
I gave up on film and just went to bed. Only just got up, so hopefully that'll help sort me out. Still feel pretty awful. So, I'm not fucked anymore, but thought I'd reply in here to kinda wave hi to ColtDan and say -- you've no need to justify yourself, and I agree it's a pretty sad state of affairs. More so if it becomes a way of life for me again.

Hopefully it won't. Shame I can't be a bit more convincing than "hopefully it won't" but what's the point? I don't feel convinced. I can easily see myself getting back into doing stims every night, which is scary given how much I screwed myself up on mephedrone. I need something else to live for, and I don't have anything to be honest. I've been thinking about uprooting and moving somewhere else in the country. Cambridge is so fucking bleak. My life is so fucking bleak. What course of action than self destruction is there when you feel depressed about your life...

Oops, self indulgent self-justification ramble. Maybe I'm just looking for any excuse to get out of my tree on stims. That could be it, too. I <3 stims.

move to devon =D its beautiful down here

you have loads to live for, just sounds like your stuck in a quite a rut, much like myself. repetitive cycle of bullshit. find the motivation to make some changes... self improvement instead of self destruction :) i love stims as well, makes you feel so alive... its a shame they're so destructive. make my emotions all over the place on the come down. lost count of the amount of times i said i was going to stop doing drugs, drinking so much and messing myself up... oh well fuck it. weekend use only seems to be alright
 
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